Blogs 4 Brownback

October 12, 2007

Early Christmas Alert: Nintendo DS

Nintendo DSThe B4B tipline recently received information about this gaming device and its devious and virtually unknown (by parents) backdoor giving child predators access to millions of children. Don’t let your child be a victim. Slam the backdoor shut by refusing to put this dangerous device on your Christmas list this year. And if you already purchased one, get out your hammer. You’re going to need it.

Introduced in 2004, the Nintendo DS (for Dual Screen or Devil Screen), this game machine has sold some 700 million or so units. That’s an epidemic. It’s undeniable that it has been a “success” for its Japanese manufacturer, Nintendo (makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires). It’s also been a tremendous success for pedophiles everywhere.

And get this (brace yourselves): the slogan for this evil piece of “hardware” is “Touching is good.” How’s that for hiding the truth in plain sight? In fact, all marketing slogans around the world for this product aimed at young children revolved around the word “touch.” There’s something seriously wrong here.

Now the problem with this abomination is not simply that it is a gaming machine which introduces and encourages our children to engage in violence for fun. No, it’s much worse than that, as if that wasn’t enough in itself. I shall elaborate on the evil that lurks within video games in general in a future Investigative Report, so stay tuned. No, the problem with this contraption is that it can easily be used by child predators and molesters to get access to your children.

Nintendo DSI have been notified by one parent whose child was solicited to “come to the mall and we can go shopping and do other fun stuff. Don’t tell your mom because she might spoil our fun. Parents are such a drag. LOL.” Fortunately her parent was watching Susie (a pseudonym) that day, as all parents should, and reacted the way any good, loving, responsible parent would. She deftly ripped the offending device out of her hands, sent the reply “stay away from my baby, you psycho” and triumphantly snapped the unit in half. Nintendo TP (two pieces). It’s garbage now.

Don’t take my word for it about the dangers of this thing. Watch an informative report that presents the objective facts, then you decide. Roll the clip, please.

Now I know that most good parents out there are aware of the danger of video games in general and would be loathe to have them in their homes. But many have probably been convinced (pestered) by their children, acting as a proxy for the video game companies (pushers), to buy an X(rated)-Box or a PPS or NES or some other newfangled video gaming gadget. I understand what can happen in a moment of weakness. I’ll give you all the reasons you need to unplug and throw out these devices at a later date. I promise.

Nintendo PervertBut if you already have a Japanese Nintendo DS in your home, the time to act is now. Snap it in half like Jill (not her real name) did and excise it from your child’s life. Your child might cry or complain or even throw a temper tantrum, but that’s far better than him or her becoming a just another statistic. Once your child has been violated or, worse, ends up on a slab at the morgue, it’s too late. Don’t wait. The time for parenting is now. Your child will thank you, eventually. So be strong. It’s the right thing to do.

Rest assured that we will have some helpful gift hints as Christmas approaches. So keep your eye on B4B. And be sure to visit our store. There’s some great gifts for the adults on your list right there, as long as they aren’t helioleftists.

Update: This is an older news item from last year, but it will shock you. Hold onto your hats and find out about the PlayStation (what a sick innuendo of a name) Portable, also known as the PlayStation Pornable.

In the comments for that video was this:

lol im 15 and no one can stop kids seeing porn, porn is a good thing, kids are sexually curious and need to learn about these things

Right (maybe), wrong, wrong, wrong and wrong. Let me reiterate: video games should not be on your Christmas list this year, or any year. Parents need to be aware of this and other dangers and need to just say no.

Update 2: Semi-related: video game expert Jack Thompson explains the danger of games like Grand Theft Auto, while a game industry shill tries to justify this unacceptable garbage, a carjack cop-killing hooker-loving simulator. Nice try, but no cigar.

Update 3: Apparently gaming insiders refer to the chat feature as “pedochat.”

Pac ManUpdate 4: Another popular game that coincided with a dramatic rise in the use of illicit drugs such as “acid” and “extasy” (by design) was Pac Man. The player’s character, “Pac” races around a carnival funhouse maze gobbling psychedelics. In the corners of the maze are “power pills” which pack a punch. The enemy ghosts, including Clyde, “trip out” when Pac downs a super pill, allowing Pac to eat his enemies alive.

Pac Man is DeadAn interesting side note is that the game was originally going to be called “Puck Man,” but knowing how foul the youth of the day were, they changed the “Puck” to “Pac.” You see, by etching away part of the “P” in “Puck,” vandals could easily spell out a profane word. The youth of the day, as in this day, loved curse words almost as much as drugs. “Pac” is probably a reference to foul-mouthed rap artist “Tu-Pac.” (Translated it means “you pack” as in packing heat.) Pac Man is not played much today. Not enough kicks.

Update 5: Here is a typical DS “game.” It will shock you.

The problem with witches is that they look like ordinary 13 year olds, which gives Japanese men no choice but to corner and feel up every young girl they come across.

Ugh. It will sicken your soul.

Update 6: See also: Video Game Perversion, by yours truly. More quality information for concerned parents about the vileness of video games.

Update 7: There is now a brief follow up to this post.  Thanks for all the positive emails.  We really appreciate it.  Thanks to all the wonderful parents who are making those snaps heard around the world!

– Psycheout

315 Comments »

  1. this is reely grose whats rong with parunts today anyways? when i was a kid we worked on tha farm and didnt have these stupid wate of time games and molesturs shud have ther balls choped of sick sick sick

    Comment by JOE — October 13, 2007 @ 3:08 pm | Reply

  2. Nintendo (makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires).

    Actually he was just a play on King Kong… And the game had Nothing about sexuality in it. AS had no other Nintendo game I ever knew. It´s against Nintendo´s corporate politics.

    And get this (brace yourselves): the slogan for this evil piece of “hardware” is “Touching is good.” How’s that for hiding the truth in plain sight? In fact, all marketing slogans around the world for this product aimed at young children revolved around the word “touch.” There’s something seriously wrong here.

    It has probably something to do with the fact that the DS incorporates a touchscreen-system?

    Comment by PG — October 14, 2007 @ 11:19 am | Reply

  3. In large part, Psycheout, I agree with you.

    However, I should point out to you that Hillary Clinton, the daughter of Satan, worked diligently to restrict GTA: San Andreas. Also, the military does use first person shooters to train recruits. I trained a couple of kids with 2D brawlers in case they have to fight Satan in a 2D world, and I noticed no moral decay. So I think that, with no sexual innuendos, video games are acceptable. God never said anything about restricting violence.

    Comment by Bob_Corker — October 14, 2007 @ 6:26 pm | Reply

  4. *YAWN* your tireless raid on these insubstaintial subjects have no bearing on the real world. There is no evidence that a pedophile has ever used any of the current handheld gaming systems to make contact with a child. Any social medium has the possibility to introduce dangers of child predators into it. So … by your reasoning… DEAR GOD BLOW UP YOUR CHILDS SCHOOL THERE COULD BE A CHILD PREDATOR THERE! Either teach your children to use these social mediums responsibly or become a hermit, cause that is the only way your children will ever be truly safe.

    Comment by Otakuchan — October 15, 2007 @ 11:31 am | Reply

  5. So true Otakuchan so true….

    Comment by Epex — October 16, 2007 @ 9:54 am | Reply

  6. “*YAWN* your tireless raid on these insubstaintial subjects have no bearing on the real world. There is no evidence that a pedophile has ever used any of the current handheld gaming systems to make contact with a child. Any social medium has the possibility to introduce dangers of child predators into it. So … by your reasoning… DEAR GOD BLOW UP YOUR CHILDS SCHOOL THERE COULD BE A CHILD PREDATOR THERE! Either teach your children to use these social mediums responsibly or become a hermit, cause that is the only way your children will ever be truly safe.”

    Statistically, most molested children are accosted by their family members, so becoming a hermit is probably the worst thing you could do. One might also point out that the DS is as popular as it is because they have approached the adult market (not meaning porn, just meaning adults use the thing) with ‘games’ designed to help with memorization and math skills and other learning tools.

    Comment by Ducks — October 18, 2007 @ 11:58 am | Reply

  7. _Hilarious_

    Wonderfully mastered satire.

    ****

    P.S. Please inform me when you are hired to write for a TV show.

    Comment by Ben Dover — October 19, 2007 @ 5:27 am | Reply

  8. “Video Game Expert”?

    That would imply knowledge and understanding, of which Jack Thompson has none.

    Comment by Werrick — October 19, 2007 @ 5:27 am | Reply

  9. I’m sick of these pedophiles in disguise claiming that all these “NEW FANGLED WEIRD GADGETS” are associated with anything bad.
    Games have ratings, kids aren’t allowed to buy games that are out of their age limit.
    Stop fucking complaining about video games, there’s a rating system, yet that’s not enough for you freaktards?
    Grow up and address something that is IMPORTANT.

    Comment by haha, oh wow. — October 19, 2007 @ 5:43 am | Reply

  10. A masterful work of trolling, this is perfection of the domain. 10/10 would read again.

    Comment by Anonymous — October 19, 2007 @ 6:46 am | Reply

  11. A very clever piece of comedic parody.
    Either that or a piece so filled with inaccuracies that theres no wonder Brownbacks campaign has derailed.
    DS Pictochat is actually proxmity based, meaning you have to be within 100ft of each other to use it. It does not use the internet to chat across.

    So reading through this. It has to be a brilliant parody… Else, Jesus wept…

    Comment by Paul Kerton — October 19, 2007 @ 8:20 am | Reply

  12. If this blog post isn’t a hoax, then I weep for the ignorance of mankind.

    Comment by Jim Sterling — October 19, 2007 @ 8:26 am | Reply

  13. Come on, it’s obviously fake. People can’t be so stupid… can they?

    Comment by Fenix — October 19, 2007 @ 9:02 am | Reply

  14. Is it caturday yet?

    Comment by Mistouze — October 19, 2007 @ 9:02 am | Reply

  15. wow. just wow. how much more mis-informed can you get?

    0% effort went into this, but hey, bible thumping christians will buy anything labled anti-god.

    Comment by SADKERMIT — October 19, 2007 @ 9:03 am | Reply

  16. [...] their children. Presidential wannabe Sen. Sam Brownback is an evangelical Christian (uh-oh) with an unofficial blog that speaks out against the horrors of the Nintendo DS, and how it is a tool that pedophiles can [...]

    Pingback by Pictochat? More like Pedochat! Sensationalist story on the DS and pedophilia at Destructoid Gaming Blog — October 19, 2007 @ 9:08 am | Reply

  17. For the love of god you should stop wasting your money there is no way that there are enough morons in the United States to make that feasible, although there were enough idiots in Kansas to get you into the Senate.

    Remind me never to go there.

    Comment by Tdiddy — October 19, 2007 @ 9:20 am | Reply

  18. I heard that child molesters know how to use phones, cars, doors, sidewalks, airplanes, stairs, bicycles, and the english language. And you know what’s even scarier? They can use any of these newfangled devices to contact your child!

    Comment by john — October 19, 2007 @ 9:26 am | Reply

  19. Thanks for pointing out the inherent evil in any child enjoying themselves in idle pleasures.

    Better to give your child a good beating than to purchase video *games*.

    God bless GWB and America!

    Comment by Prince of Darkness — October 19, 2007 @ 9:34 am | Reply

  20. Also, I really hope this is satire. I really do.

    Comment by Tinlion — October 19, 2007 @ 9:40 am | Reply

  21. The slander (aka the entire article) made me lol. 5/5

    Seriously, if you were still in the race, you would’ve lost any chance of getting my vote. It amazes me that a former runner for President of the United States will drop to the level of “obvious troll” for attention. Do you think that you’ll be respected for posting ages-old slander in an attempt to dissuade parents from buying a harmless video game system? You won’t. What did Nintendo, Sony, and/or Microsoft ever do to you, anyway?!

    Comment by Tinlion — October 19, 2007 @ 9:42 am | Reply

  22. hahahah! yea, if this isn’t a parody i pity this poor stupid freaking idiot…

    sadly, more violence throughout history has been justified by religion/God/Christ… so.. maybe the problems w/evil in the world aren’t because of the DS but because of ignorant white religious men who think they can talk with God and God made them do it (killing off of thousands of poor, ‘evil’ lost souls all for the name of religion/christianity/God).

    haha…

    Comment by seamonkey420 — October 19, 2007 @ 9:42 am | Reply

  23. WOW….just WOW.
    you people are idiots.
    I am a mid-30s business exec with 3 kids and
    a love of videogames.
    Calling Donkey Kong a sexually driven games is just
    nuts.
    I am now officially ashamed for being in the same
    party at Mr. Brownback.

    Comment by Responsible Gaming Parent — October 19, 2007 @ 9:43 am | Reply

  24. Wow you’re really good at inventing stuff Psycheout and I think you’re very lame.

    First of all, no one’s ever called it Devil Screen.

    It hasn’t sold 700 million. It has only sold about 50 million.

    And the part about the parent snapping the DS, that’s a completely made-up story you stupid sad motherlover.

    Comment by Shigeru Miyamoto — October 19, 2007 @ 9:43 am | Reply

  25. This is a joke right?

    If not I am shocked that the author has the intelligence to use the keyboard, let alone know how to blog.

    Comment by Prof.Who — October 19, 2007 @ 9:50 am | Reply

  26. What exactly does this mean for Brownback? At least you could have tacked on a sentence about Brownback trying to wipe out the “Devil Screen”. Either way, you PHAIL.

    Comment by Joshua Wu — October 19, 2007 @ 9:56 am | Reply

  27. Seriously, can we get confirmation that this post is for real? If it is, I truly do weep for the future of American intellect. It’s frighteningly inaccurate and shows no real understanding of…well, anything. If this is representative of Brownback’s supporters, it makes sense that 90 percent of America hasn’t heard of the guy.

    Comment by jeffk — October 19, 2007 @ 9:57 am | Reply

  28. Excellent satire!

    Comment by jay — October 19, 2007 @ 10:02 am | Reply

  29. My first thought was “way too obvious” but I guess a few people actually believe this so maybe I’m wrong.

    In any case, it makes SDF look like a real site.

    Comment by Robert Aitchison — October 19, 2007 @ 10:10 am | Reply

  30. I’m going to be laughing. My. Arse off, when Nintendo of America come knocking for you witha ‘cease and desist’ order. I really am.

    And its a *PSP*

    PPS could only stand for Poor Pastorly Story.

    Comment by Frozenjoker — October 19, 2007 @ 10:16 am | Reply

  31. I love people who misconstrue facts and lie to their readers only to promote a fanciful crusade who’s leader is currently under scrutanty and currently awaiting trial for contempt of court with the possibility of being disbarred.

    I left pictochat, the DS’s chat feature, open and awaiting an invitation for a full day (over 24 hours), and the only person to attempt to talk to me was my girlfriend, who lives with me, jokingly wondering why I was staring at the Pictochat screen instead of playing Rated-E game which encourages children to work hard and never give up when someone you love is in trouble. My yes, Zelda sure is evil too. Come to think of it, that also sounds a whole lot like Donkey Kong. Rated-E (for everyone), simply save the girl, and don’t give up. Pretty harmless right? I suppose King Kong just wanted to get it on too, huh?

    If you want to hit on a game being creepy and disturbing, why not go with the Left Behind game, a game where Christians kill everyone that doesn’t agree with them, converting where they can. Fun facts include: Only men can fight. Oh yes, no women in God’s army. Also included is Us-or-Them Mentality! If they’re not with us, you can kill them, God will be pleased by it.

    But you won’t. Instead of making a difference in the world, and making it a better place for everyone, you devote your time to bullshitting readers and constituents and hoping that’ll be good enough to make you money. Enjoy your new Hummer while you destroy the planet and your own children, who will no doubt turn to video games as a replacement-parent.

    Comment by Morte - Gamer for 19 yrs, Murderer/Psycho/Molestor for O yrs. — October 19, 2007 @ 10:23 am | Reply

  32. Seems I’m late to the party, but none the less, I agree with a number of the comments that came before mine. You’re a flaming idiot of the highest caliber. The fear mongering BS is the kind of stuff that has truly screwed up America. What kind of world is your child growing up in when the parent brandishes a hammer at anything that might be a potential channel for pedophiles? Might want to destroy your TV (or DV for DevilVision) your Telephone (or devilphone) and hey, destroy your windows (Devildows), too because pedophiles can see through those. Oh, and please disconnect yourself from the internet, not just because there are pedophiles on it, but just because no one ever wants to hear from you again.

    You are a disgustingly ignorant and if anyone has listened to you, I fear that they need to be committed to a psych ward immediately. What era are you living in where the initial response is “Burn it because of possibility!” We’ve come a long way from the witch burnings of Salem, but I’d support a throw-back to the era to deal with people like you.

    Comment by ChrowX — October 19, 2007 @ 10:35 am | Reply

  33. Honestly, after reading that piece of excrement, I’m left to ponder a couple of things. Firstly, just where exactly did you get the idea that it makes more sense to warn parents about the near non-existant dangers of letting a child use a DS versus the more realistic dangers of letting a child use a PC? Why not tell them to pick up their keyboard and smash it through the screen as they read your blog, just to be sure. Secondly, how on earth did you manage to turn on your own computer, get on the net and post a blog? I mean that’s quite a feat for someone as obviously moronic as yourself. You should give yourself a pat on the back. Presuming you know where your back is and how to operate your arm.

    Comment by Fergal Martin — October 19, 2007 @ 10:39 am | Reply

  34. Oh, and please disconnect yourself from the internet, not just because there are pedophiles on it, but just because no one ever wants to hear from you again.

    I must have hit a nerve. The truth hurts and makes people angry sometimes. Rest assured that B4B will never shy from the truth.

    Comment by Psycheout — October 19, 2007 @ 10:45 am | Reply

  35. Video gamers are no different than the Satanist Hippies from whose loins they sprang, evidently. These junior leftist kooks should be conscripted into the Army. Having to fight for their country instead of squandering money to use the same technology pederasts use to conduct unspeakable crimes might give them a newfound respect for God and the United States.

    Comment by Sisyphus — October 19, 2007 @ 10:58 am | Reply

  36. “Video gamers are no different than the Satanist Hippies from whose loins they sprang, evidently. These junior leftist kooks should be conscripted into the Army. Having to fight for their country instead of squandering money to use the same technology pederasts use to conduct unspeakable crimes might give them a newfound respect for God and the United States.”

    PARODY CONFIRMED!

    Comment by jeffk — October 19, 2007 @ 11:10 am | Reply

  37. How’s it feel to be the new laughing stock of the internet? People like you belong in the 19th century, churning butter and dying of cholera.

    Comment by Brownback Mountain — October 19, 2007 @ 11:11 am | Reply

  38. This blog post, which is full of mis-information and outright lies, should give you an excellent idea of why the Brownback campaign is doomed. If you are straining this hard to work your Chicken-Little Christian base into some kind of towering Jesus-based rage over a child’s plaything, you’ve already lost.

    Comment by Ryan — October 19, 2007 @ 11:14 am | Reply

  39. Hilarious.
    You should also disconnect the electricity to your house, because your kids can look at dirty magazines using the DEVIL’S LIGHT! Of course, this is perfectly normal for most kids anyway, but who knows – if they were raised in a household with such absurdly conservative knee-jerk preemptive strikes like that, then seeing something from the real world might just trigger a mental breakdown…

    Comment by Aka — October 19, 2007 @ 11:21 am | Reply

  40. Good stuff, its these kind of lies that will eventually push your fellow Republicans into the RonPaul2008.com camp

    Comment by john arbor — October 19, 2007 @ 11:24 am | Reply

  41. Wow what a loser. I hope none of you idiots ever have kids. Your retarded genes shouldn’t be passed on. That includes this ignorant excuse for a Senator. You make George Bush look like Albert Einstein. I doubt you retarded evangelical technology ignorant morons even know what Wi-Fi is, but pictochat doesn’t have it. That means it can’t be used online, and can only be used within 100 feet of someone. If you sad excuses for human life have your kids within 100 feet of child molesters then you have problems of your own. I’m surprised any of you morons knew how to turn on a computer much less post a blog or comments on it. Enjoy being mocked by the intelligent humans in this country.

    Comment by Nick — October 19, 2007 @ 11:29 am | Reply

  42. FraK YOU GO UNDER YOUR LITTLE ROCK AND DON’T COME OUT THIS TIME

    [Ed Note: Nice language, vulgarian.]

    Comment by THIS GUY IS A FreaKING RETARD — October 19, 2007 @ 11:34 am | Reply

  43. I hope for your sake that this was an attempt at humor. If you’re serious, do the world a favor and never talk to anyone, ever.

    Comment by DS — October 19, 2007 @ 11:34 am | Reply

  44. you do not speak the TRUTH. there are soo many things wrong with this piece of crap. do some research so you are at least knowledgable about the products before misinforming the misinformed who follow you.

    Considering pictochat is proximity based, that means a child molester would have to be right outside your house…AND your child would have to be sitting there with pictochat open. c’mon seriously that Will never happen. give it a break, go after a sero=ious problem, like the internet….and the thousands of ways for you r child to be corrupted there.

    Comment by wiiamputee — October 19, 2007 @ 11:41 am | Reply

  45. You got Kotaku, congrats :)

    http://kotaku.com/gaming/hysteria/brownback-blog-late-to-handheld-dangers-party-312816.php

    Keep writing man, this stuff is gold!

    Comment by A guy — October 19, 2007 @ 11:41 am | Reply

  46. “Video gamers are no different than the Satanist Hippies from whose loins they sprang, evidently. These junior leftist kooks should be conscripted into the Army. Having to fight for their country instead of squandering money to use the same technology pederasts use to conduct unspeakable crimes might give them a newfound respect for God and the United States.”

    i dont have any respect for the united states, and god has taught me not to jusge others.what has god taught you?

    Comment by wiiamputee — October 19, 2007 @ 11:44 am | Reply

  47. Yeah, if this is serious, you have no clue what you are talking about.

    Comment by Ernie — October 19, 2007 @ 11:46 am | Reply

  48. “i dont have any respect for the united states, and god has taught me not to jusge others.what has god taught you?”

    That those who hate America are often Hellbound Unitarian blasphemers, like you.

    Comment by Sisyphus — October 19, 2007 @ 11:48 am | Reply

  49. “Yeah, if this is serious, you have no clue what you are talking about.”

    Thanks, Ernie. We should pray for this William Putee’s soul together.

    Comment by Sisyphus — October 19, 2007 @ 11:49 am | Reply

  50. If G-d taught you not to judge others you would respect the United States. Wii, you just disappeared in a puff of logic.

    Comment by Psycheout — October 19, 2007 @ 11:49 am | Reply

    • Honestly, leave logic out of any discussion involving God.
      Otherwise you sign your own defeat.

      Comment by The Schwarzenator — April 14, 2010 @ 6:26 pm | Reply

  51. Bill is a sodomite. He hates America because he’d rather masturbate to tiny pictures of imaginary demons than fight for this country in Iraq. The man-child’s a complete degenerate, and should never be allowed to air his beliefs in a public forum.

    Comment by Sisyphus — October 19, 2007 @ 11:53 am | Reply

  52. LOL!

    Is this a joke?

    Comment by Sky85 — October 19, 2007 @ 12:23 pm | Reply

  53. Wait, let me get this straight: If I have a JAPANESE Nintendo DS in my household I should snap it half? What if it’s an AMERICAN Nintendo DS? Are those the ones that are safe for us? I wouldn’t even know how most Americans would get a Japanese DS, unless they imported it. Oh those Japanese…

    Great way to throw that in there. You guys make me ashamed of calling myself a Republican. Glad this guy’s campaign is going down the drain.

    Comment by fred — October 19, 2007 @ 12:27 pm | Reply

  54. This reads like a parody. Seriously. You make Jack Thompson look reasonable and sane (Hint, he isn’t.)

    Thanks for the chuckle though!

    Comment by Sian — October 19, 2007 @ 12:31 pm | Reply

  55. The fact that everything in that blog was wrong, annoys me.
    Do some proper research on Wikipedia or something before you go talking crap.

    [Ed Note: Wikipedia is full of liberal lies. Anyone can edit it and they do. It's not a reliable source of anything other than lies and misinformation.]

    Comment by Chimera — October 19, 2007 @ 12:41 pm | Reply

    • This is me replying to the Editor Note: Excuse me, but I’m more than sure I can cite the source of any information I get from wikipedia to determine it’s validity. Research the source, obtain more information and then write about it with assurance that the information I gathered is accurate.

      Cite your sources for this Susie and Jill story, otherwise, if you think you can discredit Wikipedia with the same strawman bullshit, than I, too, am going to discredit your little anecdote about a snapped DS.

      Also, Pac-man was released in the eighties and Tu-pac wasn’t famous until the early nineties. Please, do yourself a favor, and I mean this sincerely, and just turn off your computer. The internet is no place for a Extremist Christian, you don’t belong here. The internet welcomes all, even those people who are like you, but the fact is that you don’t welcome the internet. Yes, bad shit can be found on the internet, in fact, you could make a Devil-worship site in five minutes and have it published without anyone checking it for morality. The internet is not moral.

      So, if you don’t wish to see all this sin you’re so afraid of, then just turn off the computer. You are fighting a losing battle.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 9:52 pm | Reply

    • Wikipedia is a far more reliable source of information than this blog, at any rate. If I wanted to look something up, such as salmon, and google brought me to the salmon Wiki, if I scroll to the bottom, there are sources cited like any other proper credible source, any college-level thesis, any document at all with any basis in fact. If any information is not cited, there will be a note that says [citation required] to let you know that that info may not be credible. If someone changes a Wiki, the change will be reviewed, and if it’s a blatant lie and not at all credible, then it will be removed and amended by the administrators and moderators.

      You see, the difference between Wikipedia and this garbage blog is that Wikipedia and it’s users desire to document all the information they gather as accurately as possible. All you wish to do is present your side of any given information as sensationally as possible. (See the parallel there?) It’s what’s referred to as propaganda. It works because it excites people when they read it in both good and bad ways. Some people see the cheapness of your journalism and are outraged by it because they know that it is wrong, and not at all what any just lord or any reputable news source would intend. Others get excited because they believe anything they hear and want to be outraged at something.

      In short, you just like to piss people off. You piss off people who see you for what you are, which is a coward. You piss off people who are over-protective of their children, causing mass hysteria over nothing at all. I can say this with certainty, as Jack Thompson has become a laughing stock, a totem of stereotypical white christian extremists with no morals unless they are thrust upon them. (“Oh, lordy, lordy, I just said thrust, I must be a pedo.” This is most likely your reaction, seeing as how if you read this you’ll look past my legitimate case and points and only condemn me as a devil-worshipper, and further ad hominem conduct which only leads those with any sense to stop taking you seriously.) Also, I can say this with certainty because no staggering details about pedophiles raping children using nintendo devices has surfaced in, oh, 5 years and shut down nintendo with all the costly recalls.

      In any case, you are no shepherd. You’re just an outlandish propagandist.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 10:15 pm | Reply

  56. update: Let me amend that to ‘Brilliant Parody’. Thanks. :D

    Comment by Sian — October 19, 2007 @ 12:47 pm | Reply

  57. Hey, Mr. Brownback: if I solicit your child with this website, will you have to snap your computer in half?

    Comment by yowzers — October 19, 2007 @ 1:02 pm | Reply

  58. It makes me very glad to know that you will never ever be president, but it scares me that you gave it a shot.

    Comment by Eric — October 19, 2007 @ 1:03 pm | Reply

  59. I wholeheartedly agree that everyone who owns a DS should immediately do a barrel roll.

    Comment by Peppy Hare — October 19, 2007 @ 1:08 pm | Reply

  60. [Ed Note: Wikipedia is full of liberal lies. Anyone can edit it and they do. It’s not a reliable source of anything other than lies and misinformation.]

    But at the same time can’t it be bias to the right wing as well as “anyone can edit it”.

    And if its all “liberal”, then what does that say about the public’s political views?

    [Ed Note: Conservatives have better things to do than to blatantly lie on the Internet.]

    Comment by A logical guy — October 19, 2007 @ 1:12 pm | Reply

  61. How sad…..your ignorance is so apparent it’s disgusting.
    It’s simple enough to tell your child not to use pictochat in a mall or to just check up on your child like a RESPONSIBLE parent should.
    You obviously don’t seem to understand Japanese culture either to realize the slogan is completely harmless. Perhaps shame on YOU for thinking that it would imply such things?
    I also laughed really hard when I read “video game expert Jack Thompson”. This man knows virtually nothing about video games save for what he sees from videos. He is a failed lawyer who was revoked from the state bar in Alabama, among other blunders by him. Whenever a school shooting happens, he will quickly blame any and all video games, despite the fact that there is no link between the two, that there ARE people out there mentally deranged that will do these things REGARDLESS of video games, that parents do not take RESPONSIBILITY for their kids (or that responsibility thing…huh…) anymore….I could go on and on.

    Lastly, on Pac-Man, from wikipedia:
    The game was developed primarily by Namco employee Toru Iwatani over 18 months. The original title was pronounced pakku-man (パックマン, pakku-man?) and was inspired by the Japanese onomatopoeic phrase paku-paku taberu (パクパク食べる, paku-paku taberu?),[10] where paku-paku describes (the sound of) the mouth movement when widely opened and then closed in succession.[11] Although it is often cited that the character’s shape was inspired by a pizza missing a slice,[4] he admitted in a 1986 interview that it was a half-truth and the character design also came from simplifying and rounding out the Japanese character for mouth, kuchi (口) as well as the basic concept of eating.[12] Iwatani’s efforts to appeal to a wider audience — beyond the typical demographics of young boys and teenagers — would eventually lead him to adding elements of a maze. The result was a game he entitled PUCK MAN. When first launched in Japan in 1979 by Namco, the game received a lukewarm response, as Space Invaders and other similar games were more popular at the time.[6]

    So, you may have gotten the ‘puck man’ right, but there is no link between that and Tu-Pac, since the game came out when Tu-Pac was NINE YEARS OLD.

    Objective article? I’m laughing so hard right now.

    Comment by A. — October 19, 2007 @ 1:26 pm | Reply

  62. Outstanding piece of satirical writing – really top notch stuff. Stephen Colbert would be proud. Playing off such radical and alarmist views regarding a video game machine as viable evidence of their “threat” to children is pure gold. You even managed to best the king of ignorance and misinformation, Jack Thompson, in your wild and biased overview of these “satanic” gadgets. What’s even better is the irony in your using of a computer, an even “greater” threat to children than a simple game console, right? Surely that was part of the subtext, though. Someone with your talent and education and “open-mindedness” was no doubt an asset to Brownback’s campaign…

    Thanks for the laugh.

    Comment by Dash — October 19, 2007 @ 1:26 pm | Reply

  63. . . . . .

    THIS IS SATIRE, RIGHT?

    . . . If the writer of this was being serious. . . Words can not adequately express the mind-blowing idiocy. Not to mention blatant lying!

    Comment by Ryan — October 19, 2007 @ 1:32 pm | Reply

  64. Here’s a good tip to have a Nintendo DS and still keep your children safe.

    Learn how the device works. Nobody can contact your child over the Nintendo DS system unless they have exchanged a “Friendcode” with your child beforehand. These codes are meant to keep children playing the DS safe, and it is in fact against the Nintendo Terms of Service policy to exchange Friendcodes over the internet.

    All you need to do is check the friendcode list your child has composed over his time with the game and ask him or her about any suspicious names on the list. If the Friendcode was exchanged over the internet with an unknown party, then nip it in the bud and delete that person from your child’s list. You can then explain why it is dangerous to talk with strangers over the internet and all that.

    Also, remember that for each Wi-fi compatible game that goes into the DS (You can check if a game is Wi-fi compatible by checking the cover for a little light-blue icon that says “Nintendo Wi-fi”) a unique friendcode is generated, and thus a new friendlist. Games do not share friendcodes or friend lists.

    The one feature that has the potential to be dangerous is the “Pictochat” function. This is, however, easily remedied by keeping an eye on your child as he or she uses Pictochat. PChat is not over the internet, remember. it is strictly a local area network chatroom with other DS users, and because it is so limited, most people don’t use it, including, most likely, your kids. For a pedo to actually pick up a kid using pictochat, they would both have to be using pictochat on DSs, and would have to be within about 100 feet of eachother. If you keep an eye on the pictochat while your child uses it, you can nip any problems in the bud.

    Also, if your child is using Pictochat in the home, and he or she gets Pictochat signals from a predator, that means the predator is most likely next door, or somewhere in the neighborhood. Snapping your child’s DS in half in this case actually destroys the only chance you have to find out who the guy is. Nice one.

    If you actually learn how technology works, you can take steps to protect children from technology, while still teaching them how to use it. Compared to the home PC, the DS is actually an extremely benign piece of hardware, and all of this overreacting is just silly.

    Comment by Dot — October 19, 2007 @ 1:44 pm | Reply

  65. Man! PsycheOut, nice job only responding to the comments which you can think of some snarky response to.

    It’s things like this that are half the reason I’m not patriotic at all. In fact, first chance I get, I’m moving to Osaka.

    I sincerely hope that not every senator is as misguided as you, Brownback. Seriously, “DevilScreen?” That’s… hilarious, actually. Where do you get “devil” from games that help with memory, or sunshiny Mario adventures, or games about being an attorney, or solving puzzles and fighting evil in the new Zelda game? Oh, but wait, memory helps people remember they’re pedophiles, Mario only wants to rescue the princess to get some sex, defense attorneys are the ones who save the criminals, and fighting is never the answer.

    Using your logic, anyone could find faults in ANYTHING! Why don’t we ban GRASS because if it’s tall enough pedophiles can hide in it? Let’s ban blogs, too, in that case, because misguided fools of senators can try to spread their “truths” to impressionable soccer moms everywhere?

    Comment by Am a Lolicon — October 19, 2007 @ 1:46 pm | Reply

  66. [Ed Note: Conservatives have better things to do than to blatantly lie on the Internet.]

    Apparently not if the article you wrote is any indication.

    Comment by Ferdinand — October 19, 2007 @ 1:48 pm | Reply

  67. By the way, sorry to double post, but nice job with the racism there. “Japanese Nintendo DS.”

    Comment by Am a Lolicon — October 19, 2007 @ 1:48 pm | Reply

  68. First off, let’s try to get our info from someplace OTHER than Fox news, home of paranoia and hubris. As a “good, loving, responsible parent” you shouldn’t shirk your parental responsibilities onto a company who made a handheld device, and marketed it to EVERYONE, from adults to children.

    This plays so well into the hyper-conservative, schizophrenic mindset who follow Fox News as it were gospel truths and not fabrications. Nintendo has advertised all over the pictochat features, and the 65′ radius of communication is for the DS itself, the WiFi will automatically extend that… that’s fairly basic knowledge of computers which and “good, loving, responsible parent” should know before allowing their kid a device like this.

    And what is this “Playstation Pornable” crap? The PSP has a removable memory stick which can be uploaded with photos. obviously the intention is family snapshots, etc., but anyone could upload pornographic images. But so does every digital camera, PDA, cell phone, etc etc. And as far as accessing the internet for pornographic images, yes it is totally possible, but it’s also possible on your home computer as well, except the PSP has a more obvious internet history cache which is easier to access to tell where the owner has been.

    Why is it that hyper-conservatives (who give Republicans a bad name, btw) speak so much about responsibility and personal rights, and then turn around and BLAME everything they possibly can without a shred of evidence. rock music, heavy metal, D&D, video games, movies, comics, books. let’s just burn em all, right? we’ll all sit around and read the bible together. sounds fun. Not one person has ever caused harm, received harm, or harmed themselves with any of those interests, no matter how in depth, unless they already had a previously existing mental disorder. Columbine’s shooters listened to Rammstein and Marilyn Manson, sure. But Charles Manson was a devout christian and listened to The Beatles.

    Nothing in the blog above is true, whatsoever. The Fox fright factor of “evil groups who prey on strange children” is fallible as well, as the VAST vast VAST majority of children harmed are caused by family members and close friends of the family. THAT is a fact. If you’re going to attempt a ‘crusade’ against a toy, especially in an era when the world is filled with suffering, at the very least be capable of backing it with some hard facts, not conjecture and assumptions made by the most faulty news source in the world.

    Comment by Matthew — October 19, 2007 @ 1:52 pm | Reply

  69. Hey Ed., you’re giving “conservatives” a bad name by lumping yourself in with them. You’re on the way-way-out lunatic fringe, and your misinformed ranting is a disservice to the cause you seem to support.

    Scanning through some previous posts, this blog calls Obama’s campaign staff “race pimps.” Do you realize that this makes you a degenerate bigot? Maybe that plays in Bible-humper territory, but head to the coasts and urban centers and you’ll be branded the mouth-breathing coward that you are. The video-game stuff makes sense in context: You’re completely out of your mind.

    Comment by jeffk — October 19, 2007 @ 2:08 pm | Reply

  70. YOu are pathetic. Pac in pac man is pernounced like Pack not poc like in Tu Poc. Its borderline retarted that you would even come up with the bullpoop that is in the article. DS devil screen? Wow thats the most original piece of informatnoin I have ever heard. You are going aganist very republican ideals by writing this article. What ever happened to the first ammendment. Freedom of speach and expression more specificaly.

    [Ed Note: Psycheout was exercising his right to free expression. Got a problem with that? Lurn too spel by thuh waie.]

    Besides picto chat can’t even go online? YOu have to be in 30 feet of someone. ANd that bullpucky news story lied. I can’t even get picto chat across my house let alone through a mall. If brownback who I dispise for his flip flopping taticts and amnisy for illegal alieans fellons [Ed Note: Huh?] I must remind you supports this blog. He is truly phatetic. He’s a descrase to the republican party and I would never cast my vote for him as my Govenor.

    Yes I’m christian and yes I’m a true conserative. You guys who agree with this article are the liberals who are degrtading free speach in the nation.

    [Ed Note: You swear like a liberal. You're no conservative, pal. Nice try. And please try to resist commenting while drunk.]

    Comment by A concerned Teen Republican — October 19, 2007 @ 2:09 pm | Reply

  71. [Ed Note: Conservatives have better things to do than to blatantly lie on the Internet.]

    I assume you’ll trying to be funny, sadly it fails, because its ture. Conservaties have the same ablity to lie as any other group and have done in the past, and will continue to. I’m not having a go at the Conservatie’s point of view when I say that, its human nature and the same number of Liberals lie as the number of Conservatives. But remeber, just because somethuing doesn’t agree with YOUR view doesn’t means its wrong nor Liberal

    But back to topic ,the thing is, that you have overlooked, gamers are divided polictal just as much as any group, some conservaties, some liberal, some socialist, etc. But what you have done to alienate ALL gamers is to attack their past time/hobby/social networking paltform (depending on what your view is), what makes it worse, you have attacked with a very little understanding of the industry and VERY little sources to back up your view.

    At the end of the day not all games are GTAs, pichochat is a VERY limited software with the pedo having to be IN the room to talk to your kid with and games are most gamers are normal people.

    I would love to have a proper chat on this, but only if your facts are ture, if they were, alot of people would have much more respect.

    Comment by A logical guy — October 19, 2007 @ 2:18 pm | Reply

  72. lol, great article!

    Wait. This isnt satire? Wow.

    Comment by Kyle — October 19, 2007 @ 2:23 pm | Reply

  73. your sir are stupid..go find some other thing to criticize upon. this is whats wrong with people like you, you dont get technology so you bash it.you disgust me..attach the word “pedophile”,”terrorist” or any negative word like that to something as incredible as the DS and PSP and Xbox..etc..to make it look bad.i cant stand parents and old near to death people like you. “i dont understand how to work a remote..soo it MUST be the devil’s tool”..Get a hobby!..or something..dont like it turn the F**k around!!..IGNORANCE is contagious nowadays…isnt it..next thing youll probably say is that mixing cement and building roads is demonic..just so you and people like you will stay away from doing work like that..in the words or a great comedian..”REEETARDED!!”

    Comment by laughable — October 19, 2007 @ 2:29 pm | Reply

    • It’s called buzzwording, and it’s alot like name-dropping. It’s designed to get a reaction. Ewe Laws Dug Aim.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 10:25 pm | Reply

  74. This is the most ridiculous blog entry on any blog that I have ever read, that attempts to take itself seriously. Anyone with even a hint of the concept of propaganda and misinformation for the benefit of a party could see what this unapologetically ignorant post this is. I’m a proud republican; Posts like this make me wish that YOU were not. Knee-jerk reactions, intentional and unintentional misinterpretations, and just plain wrong facts are all here, in this post, and you may not believe this, but all of these fallacies are very easy to see. Everyone reading this: Do not give this man control of your opinions, and of your mind. He is targeting topics that you many not know much about and feeding you beliefs that, if you believed them, would be most convenient for him. Please, before taking a side on this topic, do your own research, from many different sources, and then make your own opinions. I’m confident that you will not come to the same ridiculous conclusions that this man has come to.

    [Ed Note: Perhaps you should change your handle to "Concern Troll." You sound about as proudly republican as Hillary Clinton.]

    Comment by Concerned — October 19, 2007 @ 2:37 pm | Reply

    • To the Editor, ad hominem attacks render all your comments fallacious.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 10:40 pm | Reply

  75. Have we gone back to the 80s, I mean he mentions the NES so…just maybe

    Fact is, you are talking complete rubbish. You mention that “Oh Lordy Lordy, cast away thy evil Nintendo DS young fellow or ye will be burned”. What about parents who like video games? My entire family plays video games and guess what Kojak, none of us have killed anyone! I and my family will be playing video games for years to come and not listen to some jumped up idiot who thinks that if you even touch a video game then you’ll turn into a psycho who likes to kill people. I’m not even going to talk about the pedophille comment because it’s just utter garbage and diverts people from the real reasons which could prevent further sick acts against children happening. I swear, something becomes popular and it some idiot just has to try and get it banned or destroyed. I’m leaving this post now because i’ll just get more angry at the blog poster’s stupidity

    Also i’d just like to mention that my Nintendo DS is sat right in front of me and it’s not conviencing me that I should kill anyone.

    Also Jack Thompson is not a video games expert, anyone stupid to think he is really does need their head checking so quickly go phone your doctor and book an appointment because it may just save your sanity

    Signed, a fifteen year old gamer and his family

    Comment by Doctor Who — October 19, 2007 @ 2:44 pm | Reply

  76. Notice how the blogger keeps feeding the trolls? This is probably the most traffic this craptastic little site has ever gotten in a day. Nothing brings in the clicks like a half-wit posting inflammatory misinformation!

    Comment by jeffk — October 19, 2007 @ 2:56 pm | Reply

  77. Wow. What a ridiculous article…Get a clue you fraking douchebag. If your such a Jesus crusader, then why do you try and manipulate people and cause hysteria over bullpoo? Jesus doesn’t like liars and bullpoopers Mr. Brownback.

    [Ed Note: Please watch your language. This is a family friendly website. Thank you.]

    Comment by Ben Gwinner — October 19, 2007 @ 2:58 pm | Reply

  78. hey ED…..Eat a Dick…..thats from my Entire family.

    Comment by Ben Gwinner — October 19, 2007 @ 3:08 pm | Reply

  79. Awesome article, great satire. I find it amusing that the majority of commenters on here don’t realize you are joking. Shows how completely insane a lot of conservatives really are!

    Comment by Kris Erickson — October 19, 2007 @ 3:14 pm | Reply

  80. Try doing real research before you post hilariously uninformed articles such as this.
    Picto-Chat is certainly included with every DS system. However, to talk to another person, there must be someone using the same program within a certain physical range of you. Usually it’s around thirty feet, so said offender would likely be within the same room as the child that had received the message.

    The nickname of pedochat, as far as I have seen, is in reference to articles (satire or not) similar as this. It’s meant as sort of a joke.

    Also, “Pac” from “Pac Man” being a reference to the rapper Tu-Pac? You’re really reaching here. The rename occurred way before he had ever, or was even old enough to release an album. Or at least, I’m pretty confident he never did when he was somewhere around the age of ten.

    I would also, given the tone of the article, like to know the writer’s stance on Japan, specifically Japanese technology companies. Nintendo and Sony, for example.

    (By the way, “… PPS, NES or some other newfangled video gaming gadget” is an excellent line. No idea what a PPS is, other than a possible typo, and the NES is well more than twenty years old.)

    Comment by Stacy — October 19, 2007 @ 3:16 pm | Reply

  81. What kind of backwater hicks are you? You guys who wrote this are full of outright falsehoods and lies. This thing, called factual accuracy, would like to talk to you.

    Comment by Realism — October 19, 2007 @ 3:45 pm | Reply

  82. This article is as silly as damning oxygen because criminals breathe it.

    Comment by A concerned citizen — October 19, 2007 @ 3:46 pm | Reply

  83. I for one support your cause Mr. Brownback. I am worried with the direction this country is headed and I don’t believe these foreign games are making anything any better. This article has really opened my eyes to the evils that surround us in these dark times. Each morning I pray for a candidate with the wisdom to follow His path and His word, something that is becoming less and less likely in this country.

    My 11 year old daughter owned a “Nintendo DS,” however, after reading the article “Pokemon” on those “Pocket Monsters” I have grounded her from using that machine. Not a moment too soon either. I only wish there were more responsible parents out there who had the strength and moral backbone to decide what is truly best for their children.

    Comment by Supporter1 — October 19, 2007 @ 4:07 pm | Reply

    • Your kids will grow to resent you until you take a second and do some actual research on their interests. Pokemon? seriously, how can that be evil. You catch fictional charcters to be your friends and pets as opposed to hunting and killing actual animals for sport. This is the least evil thing I can think of.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 10:48 pm | Reply

  84. This is by far the dumbest thing I’ve read. The idiot who wrote this obviously didn’t get his facts straight.

    Comment by Chris — October 19, 2007 @ 4:18 pm | Reply

  85. Now I’m not sure what is more stupid, the comments beliving this to be real or the blog post itself.

    Comment by A really concerned citizen. — October 19, 2007 @ 4:36 pm | Reply

  86. to seriously believe pac-man is based on tu-pac is lunacy. you’re kidding right? pac-man came out in 1981 for god’s sake. read a damned book before another one of your wal-mart employee voters reads this and takes it as fact. you are not funny if this is satire, and an outright idiot if this is serious.

    Comment by Matthew — October 19, 2007 @ 4:54 pm | Reply

  87. You are so horribly misinformed that I’m not sure why I’m even going to bother trying to correct you.

    1) Pictochat’s range is only about 30 feet and ANY object between the DS’s can greatly shorten that range. It is NOT capable of online chatting. It can ONLY be used in very short range.

    2) The PSP was not intended to carry porn. The only reason one can put porn on it is because of it’s use of memory sticks. All a parent has to do is bother to block porn sites on their computer and they can’t be downloaded in the first place.

    3) Jack Thompson is certainly NOT a specialist. He is EXTREMELY biased – apparently just like you.

    4) I’m a frequent user of popular video game-centric forums like the ones on GameFAQs, and I have never heard the term “pedochat” used.

    5) Someone didn’t do any research. The use of “Pac” in Pac-Man actually came from its original name in Japan, which was Puck-Man. Because vandals could make the character’s name rather vulgar in English by erasing a part of the “P”, they decided to go with the similar-sounding name Pac-Man.

    [Ed Note: Learn to read, Laura. #5 was covered in the article. Learn to watch, Laura. The range is far beyond 30 feet as shown in the video report.]

    Comment by Laura — October 19, 2007 @ 4:56 pm | Reply

  88. i am a frequenter of many gaming forums and am quite versed in the gaming world, but i am not an insider. however, two of my friends very much ARE and have been for 20 years. Pedochat is NOT a term used in either setting. what is with the hyper-conservative morality plays centered around pedophiles? i mean, in the 1800s, a girl not wearing a hat was scandalous, so now you guys gotta up the shock ante, then complain about our culture of shock?

    Comment by Matthew — October 19, 2007 @ 5:07 pm | Reply

  89. the person who makes this blog is a retard.

    Comment by asfas — October 19, 2007 @ 5:12 pm | Reply

  90. Is… is this a joke? Like a joke website, posting funny things? because if it is, then you got me! If it isn’t, Jesus Christ man, pull your head out of your ass!

    Comment by Leon Baillargeon — October 19, 2007 @ 5:14 pm | Reply

  91. You are sick or crazy. The games is just for fun and nothing more.
    If you will be consider the games as a seriose problem, than it will be a problem.
    Be easy. ;)
    the children carry natural cruelty to virtual enemies and don`t to theire friends…
    Better look what does your children do whan they played on the streets…

    WE had a shock than we knew that your children can free get a real weapon.
    THIS IS A PROBLEM, Not The Games. Think about it.

    Comment by Loki — October 19, 2007 @ 5:20 pm | Reply

  92. P.S.From Russia with Love… =))))

    Comment by Loki — October 19, 2007 @ 5:22 pm | Reply

  93. What the heck don’t you hate, honestly?

    [Ed Note: Watch your language, pal.]

    Comment by God — October 19, 2007 @ 5:31 pm | Reply

  94. [Ed Note: Learn to read, Laura. #5 was covered in the article. Learn to watch, Laura. The range is far beyond 30 feet as shown in the video report.]

    I see you edited your comment to my post shorty after you posted it, so I don’t have to comment about Pac-Man.

    As for 5, I watched the video. I have tested it myself, and at about 30 feet, it doesn’t take much between us to disconnect us. It can hit 65 feet only if nothing is between the players. Besides, I’m am not going to believe “research” from the same people (Fox News) that have previously claimed you can use PictoChat online, and the idea that a pedophile in a car is going to somehow stay within range, drive well enough to stay in range while using PictoChat, and the kids in the other car just so happen to be using PictoChat as well is simply preposterous.

    Oh, and the chances of a pedophile not only finding a kid playing their DS in public small, since most parents are concerned that they’ll lose their DS, but the chance that the kid is also playing PictoChat is very minimal, since it’s just a novelty that gets boring quick. When they play, they are usually playing one of the much more enjoyable games available. I have a DS(Original and Lite versions), I play it often, and I haven’t touched PictoChat since nearly two years ago, when I first got the original DS.

    Comment by Laura — October 19, 2007 @ 5:38 pm | Reply

  95. EDIT: I see the mistake I made, but my points are still valid.

    I’ve posted my opinion, and I have nothing more to say, so don’t bother arguing or posting counter-points.

    [Ed Note: Okay.]

    Comment by Laura — October 19, 2007 @ 5:43 pm | Reply

  96. It freaking amases me somtimes how stupid and over compulsive some people are.

    Games are for fun. If you didt have a perverted mind in the firsts place you would think like that. [idiots]

    Comment by sciz_bisket — October 19, 2007 @ 5:47 pm | Reply

  97. alot of that was lies also.

    Comment by sciz_bisket — October 19, 2007 @ 5:48 pm | Reply

  98. This was a very amusing joke. I give it five stars.

    Comment by アイス — October 19, 2007 @ 6:15 pm | Reply

  99. Okay, you OBVIOUSLY have some misguided facts in this.
    1. The DS pretty much requires you to be within speaking distance of the other person. So if you ever encountered one over the network, you’d merely have to look within a 50-foot range for somebody else playing a DS.
    2. It clearly states in the systems manual to be careful about who you talk with. If the parents don’t read the manual, it’s their fault – not Nintendo’s.
    3. Are you SERIOUS? Do you actually think you have a chance of winning ANY sort of popularity contest, especially one where the fate of a country hangs in the balance? Your extremism makes you a modern day Hitler. Just replace the word “Jew” with “Gay”, and your political stances are one and the same.
    4. Jack Thompson is a corrupt moron, who knows next-to-nothing about what he protests.
    5. PacMan supports DRUG USE? Honest to god, just stop talking. Every word you say merely makes you seem like more and more of a jackass.
    6. It’s called PICTOchat. Do some research before you start getting mad over something.

    Comment by Chris Berg — October 19, 2007 @ 6:18 pm | Reply

  100. this is misinformed. No ds online game allows you to chat with anyone across the net. The only game with a voice chat feature that i know is metroid prime hunters and thats rated T and your kids shouldn’t have it, not only that but only people that you know can communicate with you. If you randomly connect with someone this feature is disabled. You have to do this elaborate friends code system and its a pain, in fact its so much of a pain that people who are friends don’t even go to the trouble. Animal Crossing has this feature too, but again you have to already know them and get their friends code, and in this game you cant randomly connect to anyone.

    as far as pictochat goes, the only way to get pictochat to work with another person is if your within 30 feet, anymore and you won’t be able to connect, so unless someone is right outside your house they cannot abduct your children nor randomly talk to people on the net. If someone is picked up using ds pictochat then the parents are the ones who should be locked up. For neglect. The DS totaly safegaurds children from pedophiles. Its safeguarded so much that even adults have trouble communicating with adults.

    as far as attaining friends code goes, theres only two ways to do it, either by word of mouth. A freind who also has a ds(and in fact, every game has a different friends code, so its even more difficult to communicate), or by going online onto a forum and getting one off of a board, which your children should not be allowed to do.

    Stop demonifying electronics and their companies, be responsible, and don’t neglect your children. Maybe your children shouldn’t be spending so much time playing videogames and using the computer, maybe they should read books and socialize with real people and get some exercise. Social phobia and obesity is on the rise. I’m not saying that your kids shouldn’t play video games, on the contrary im a gamer, but life is bigger than going to school everyday coming home and playing videogames and watching tv, computer. Repeat.

    Comment by Patrick Merritt — October 19, 2007 @ 6:38 pm | Reply

  101. Dear Editor:
    In regards to this:
    “[Ed Note: Learn to read, Laura. #5 was covered in the article. Learn to watch, Laura. The range is far beyond 30 feet as shown in the video report.]”

    What if the video report is also clearly false? Grab two DS systems and try it out yourself. It IS possible to go past the 30 feet mark, but not by much (40ish if we’re in a clear area). Certainly nowhere NEAR the distance needed for the article to be credible.

    I’ve got two DSes myself (I own one, as does my husband), and can personally verify this.

    Comment by Stacy — October 19, 2007 @ 7:00 pm | Reply

  102. Videogames can be bad, but they usually aren’t. The Nintendo DS is massively successful worldwide, and jealousy and envy shown by attempting to make it look ‘evil’ will not stop its success. Deal with it.

    Now go do something worth doing.

    Comment by sergioalb64 — October 19, 2007 @ 7:04 pm | Reply

  103. I feel terribly sorry for the future of America. I’m glad I don’t live in your country

    Comment by no one — October 19, 2007 @ 7:25 pm | Reply

  104. Hmm, I was originally in support of responsible church-monitored video-games, but now that I have seen these pixel-fornicating fanboys myself, I think I have confirmed that Fox News is a filthy liberal organization by outright lying about her support of banning video games. (Not True.) This love of video games is to be expected of women, however. Repealing the Nineteenth Amendment and this ‘women’s suffrage’ movement will strengthen our families and stop the fanboys. Execution of these Scientologist moonbats is in order.

    Comment by Bob_Corker — October 19, 2007 @ 7:40 pm | Reply

  105. I get the feeling that commenter 83 was being serious…

    Right, were to start. These “foreign” things you refer to, well golly-gosh, you’ll never believe this but some games are actually made in America *shock horror*

    You mentioned evils, implying video games I see. Well isn’t terrorism, murder, rape, etc etc much worse than a small machine which brings enjoyment and togetherness in so many homes because logic seems to suggest that they are much much worse.

    That parents comment about how “parents should have more backbone and protect their children from these great evils” really got on my wick end. My parents gave me my first ever video games console when I was five and i’ve turned out alright, hell i’m quite smart, and I could put that down to the thinking that video games made me do when I was younger (possibly not but most likely they helped).

    I just really think that you’re the sort of person who thinks that everything normal people see as trivial as evil and against God.

    Also Pokemon is a harmless adventure game where you just wander the land, catch Pokemon who do become your friends and generally have a good time

    Again, the blogger’s stupidity is still making me laugh at this very moment

    Comment by Doctor Who — October 19, 2007 @ 7:53 pm | Reply

  106. this is bull crap the whole situation with the video games industry is getting out of control
    like doctor who or who ever said i got my first console when i was seven im now twentie and i dont have any bad thoughts at all and if my kid wants a console he will sure get one.
    gaming develops your brain and is a good way of stress relief so please just stop preaching bad words at it
    look what religion has done in iraq and afghanastan would you like that to happen here cos if people like you try control things it could eventually happen

    Comment by God — October 19, 2007 @ 8:11 pm | Reply

  107. How many of you F_ckin’ Retards are going to keep thinking he actually said this? Use your brains, its a parody.

    Satire is wasted on morons.

    [Ed Note: There is elegance in your ignorance. Satire? Parody? No. Truth. It's a bitter pill to swallow for gaming fanatics.]

    Comment by LE — October 19, 2007 @ 8:40 pm | Reply

  108. Аффтар лох, иди и уяпись! Муйня кантейнерская, на такое нада сверху пасрать и бантик задуйить! Аффтар вылажи пелотаг!! Тема йопли нираскрыта!

    [Ed Note: That's the most sensible comment I've read all day. благодарю Вас!]

    Comment by Barabaka_the_dog — October 19, 2007 @ 9:29 pm | Reply

  109. That Pac-Man bit at the end confirmed my suspicion of this site being an elaborate parody.

    Comment by ninjacat11 — October 19, 2007 @ 9:33 pm | Reply

  110. Where are you getting your information? I see three huge holes in your logic.

    1. I agree strongly that pedophilia is extremely harmful and evil, and that children need to be protected from this menace. However, you seem to imply that any electronic medium that allows pedophiles any form of contact with children should automatically be destroyed. Ironically, you are promoting such an ideal via the one medium responsible for connecting the most predators with their victims–the Internet. Yet you have never said anything about banning Internet use “for the sake of the children.” It’s good to see that blatant hypocrisy in politics is still alive and well.

    2. NONE of the images are from the websites of the game manufacturers–in fact, the creepy Mario touching picture is a parody created by…brace yourself…PEOPLE WHO HATE NINTENDO. And regarding your Donkey Kong claim: Bestiality is never mentioned in the game, nor are Donkey Kong’s motives for kidnapping the princess. Why? Because his motives don’t matter–all that matters is that the player, as the hero, defeats the kidnapper in the end. In fact, bestiality isn’t even implied in the game! It takes a seriously dirty mind to come up with such a suggestion–so much so that I begin to question your mental state.

    3.Also, Pac-Man got his name from the Japanese word “paku,” meaning “to eat.” He got this name because the only thing he does in the game is eat. Also, I would like to see actual statistics showing a correlation between Pac-Man (or any game, video-based or otherwise, for that matter). Claiming such a controversial statement without any facts to back you up, only makes you look like a 2-year-old who insists, “There are fairies in my backyard! You just can’t see them because they’re hiding!!”

    4. Video games evolved from board games and other similar means of entertainment. If video games are inherently evil, then surely the board games which spawned them are also inherently evil–even board games with a Christian theme. So why not try having Risk banned for encouraging world domination while you’re at it?

    Comment by Confused — October 19, 2007 @ 9:52 pm | Reply

  111. Dear Sisyphus:

    1. You are named after an ancient Greek god. I find it deliciously ironic that a diehard “Christian” (and I use the term very loosely here) would choose a pagan deity for a screenname.

    2. Mark 6:1-2. Keep spewing hate and see what happens.

    3. Before you call me anti-Christian or anti-America: I was born and raised in the Church, have numerous copies and versions of the Bible at home (including but not limited to: KJV, Good News, TEV, and NIV), and voted for GWB in 2004. And you know what? I have a great amount of respect for this country, just not the moronic Connecticut-born oil tycoon whom I was foolish enough to vote for in a spectacular lapse of judgement.

    Comment by Confused — October 19, 2007 @ 10:05 pm | Reply

  112. So, the Devil Screen, eh?

    O GAWD TEH JAPANESE NINTENDO PPLZ R GUNNA KILL US ALL WIT TEH BEJEBUZ AND DEIR DEVIL SKREENZ AND DEIR WIIZ

    Yeah, I’m surprised they haven’t commented about the Wii >_>

    BEJEBUZ

    Comment by WHAT THE Heck? — October 19, 2007 @ 10:10 pm | Reply

  113. S*** F*** F**** DILDO DILDO DIDO i use a comb to shove it down peoples ****.

    Well, I was talking to Bubba yesterday through Pictochat, and I got raped, AGAIN!

    Nice, real nice. Now I know not to trust you, after all, I AM gay…

    Go to http://www.seemep**.com PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN TYPE B*** S*X

    [Ed Note: You are a disturbed individual. Go away, pervert.]

    Comment by Sp*rm in A**hole — October 19, 2007 @ 10:16 pm | Reply

  114. Oh my goodness. Somebody terribly needs a life.

    For anyone who actually owns a Nintendo DS (myself included) and uses their WiFi access to play games over the Internet, they’d know that Nintendo is pretty stringent when it comes to their online gaming policy. In order to play games over the Internet with people, you must have their “friend code” which severely limits the people you can talk to. If you don’t have someone’s friend code, you can often play games with people you don’t know, however, you cannot communicate with them . . . so no exchanging of emails or any of that exists.

    Now I can see legitimate arguments for PictoChat opening the door to pedophiles. Thank God it is only within a certain radius and not the entire Internet (ironic, really, since your site is on the Internet, a bastion for pedophiles). For people who want a family friendly machine, perhaps it’d have been best to limit this feature to friend codes also or to have the option to turn it off all together. But I think “snapping it in two” to be just a little dramatic. Just as I think finding the devil under every rock is.

    You’ll be happy to know that the Nintendo Wii has very strict parental lock features, a welcome update for concerned parents, even barring ‘Net access.

    I think the most important thing in all of this is to teach children responsibility. As a young kid, I was taught to say “no” to strangers.

    Also, PlayStation Pornable is NOT the official name for the PSP and it is dishonest to suggest it is. :P If I recall correctly, the machine has a child-lock feature. So if a parent buys their children the machine and doesn’t read the owner’s manual to learn to lock this feature out, the responsibility is on their own heads. Just as it is if they didn’t bother reading the NDS manual before handing it over to their children.

    Grand Theft Auto is not made for kids. Any parents who let kids play these games are irresponsible. Should we severely limit the games that are available and marketed toward consenting adults just because a few parents break the rules and buy these games for their children? I don’t think so. Ever watch an R rated movie? If so, do you think it unfair to ban R rated movies just because a few parents let their kids watch them?

    Finally, I want to humor you a bit. The funny thing is, you have no clue what you’re even talking about. “Pac” is not the main character of “Pac-Man” . . . “Pac-Man” is. And I think it takes a tremendous leap in logic to suggest the game promotes drugs because of a color change in the ghosts when Pac-Man eats a pellet and because there’s a character named “Clyde”.

    I think the more compelling argument is that Pac-Man’s original name was “Puck Man” because he is shaped like a hockey puck. What you state about the whole vandal issue is true — that is why it was changed. But that was because of a few hooligans who might be tempted to vandalize the machine, not to mask some conspiracy that Pac-Man is really about converting people to sexual experimentation. Because you can’t even get a few simple things correctly clues me in that you really don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re interested in sensationalism and that is it.

    Pac-Man is likewise about a decade or so removed from Tu-Pac, so your conspiracy theory doesn’t apply here either.

    Comment by Derek Rumpler — October 19, 2007 @ 10:44 pm | Reply

  115. Swallow a freaking Frisbee, Brownback.

    [Ed Note: I hope that makes you feel better.]

    Comment by Ruigi — October 19, 2007 @ 11:07 pm | Reply

  116. Dear Brownback,

    You are a f*cking idiot.

    Love Trent.

    Comment by Trent — October 19, 2007 @ 11:14 pm | Reply

  117. Brownback people, I know you’re all not the smartest in the bunch, else you wouldn’t be supporting a crook like Brownback. So I’m gonna lay it out for you- this whole article is fearmongering baloney from start to finish. Do not believe anything Jack Thompson tells you, the man is a dirtbag lawyer scuzzbucket who’s built a career out of demonizing videogames. He’s getting you all riled up and then laughing all the way to the bank with your political contributions. The man is slime, stay away from him and anything he endorses.

    Comment by Hawanja — October 19, 2007 @ 11:15 pm | Reply

  118. This is a giant piece of fail if they are serious. If this is a parody, you gave me quite a chuckle.

    Comment by =\ — October 19, 2007 @ 11:20 pm | Reply

  119. [Ed Note: Please watch your language. This is a family friendly website. Thank you.]

    Yet you have, in your blog, on clear display, pictures of violence and references to homosexual intercourse. Not even in the comments–in the blog itself. Oh the irony.

    Comment by Confused — October 20, 2007 @ 12:16 am | Reply

  120. Dear Confused Commenters,

    Does anyone else notice that with his Updates, he gradually made the post more and more ridiculous?

    Why on earth would he be doing that?

    He’s trying to get you to notice: IT’S SATIRE.

    I mean, c’mon, the tu-pac/pacman thing…

    How obvious can it get?

    Comment by -_Q — October 20, 2007 @ 1:30 am | Reply

  121. Hahahaha, I hope this is a joke, because if it ain’t it’s the biggist pile of feces on the internet.

    Comment by The Master — October 20, 2007 @ 4:02 am | Reply

  122. Dear Brownback,

    Some people shouldn’t have kids.

    Love,
    Your Mother

    Comment by Your Momma — October 20, 2007 @ 4:05 am | Reply

  123. “this is reely grose whats rong with parunts today anyways? when i was a kid we worked on tha farm and didnt have these stupid wate of time games and molesturs shud have ther balls choped of sick sick sick”

    Yes, you must have worked really hard on that farm to develop such poor written english.

    Comment by vk — October 20, 2007 @ 8:00 am | Reply

  124. BRB, CHURCH

    Comment by /b/ — October 20, 2007 @ 10:23 am | Reply

  125. …This is ridiculous. It absolutely HAS to be a joke; no one could be so stupid as to claim that “Pac-Man” is a reference to Tupac Shakur and still have the capacity to form sentences as well as the author of above article did. I believe that Tupac is his real name (not some thug alias), but I’m not sure as I don’t know much aside from what it says on wikipedia. I am glad, though, that at least a couple other people caught on to the fact that Pac-Man came out OVER A DECADE before his career began.

    The dead giveaway? Calling Jack Thompson a video game expert. ;D

    [Ed Note: I suspect the Tupac reference was a joke. I didn't even know who the guy was. Actually I still don't. And I couldn't care less. Rapers are the lowest form of life.]

    Comment by LMD — October 20, 2007 @ 10:25 am | Reply

  126. Guess what, guys!

    This man is an IDIOT

    Comment by Shkrigglynufft — October 20, 2007 @ 10:37 am | Reply

  127. Okay okay Psycheout, despite the fact that your article reads like satire (making your supposedly serious article sound ridiculous from the get go) and the fact that your article seems to contain no real facts (except ones you seem to have invented, but I don’t think anything your graphic imagination spews is a fact) I’m prepared to make you an offer. In the name of protecting children everywhere I propose that you take up the “devil screen”, activate the “pedochat” function and see if you are able to find a genuine child molester. If you are able to do this I will personally dontate $10,000 to the Brownback campaign fund, I’ll even give you half a year to do it in. In fact in addition to that $10,000 I will throw in all my worldly assets and be reduced to a humble homeless man content with the knowledge that the children are safe because of your tireless efforts.

    Now see most people would consider that offer a joke but I am deeply serious about it, I would genuinely give up all my worldly posessions and status if you could accomplish this feat. So you can see the only real reason I’m making this offer is because the probability of you ever managing this is so close to 0 it’s not quite impossible but merely astronomically improbable.

    Seriously do your research next time, you may think you’re being smart with all your snarky retorts but in reality you are a joke. This article is a joke. Your views on this matter are a joke. That you are a joke is probably one of the few genuine facts on this entire page and nothing you say will change this.

    Comment by Lazarus — October 20, 2007 @ 10:47 am | Reply

  128. u r ttly rite d00d, this game is BANANAS!

    Comment by Baramos — October 20, 2007 @ 2:21 pm | Reply

  129. Congratulations, you’ve been mocked on another video game site:

    http://oneclickwifi.net/forums/index.php?act=topic&id=2764

    [Ed Note: Pimping your own post, eh? A weak attempt at mockery. At least some of the others tried.]

    Comment by Tinlion — October 20, 2007 @ 5:03 pm | Reply

  130. This is the gayest article ever. If you let your child get raped or some poo poo because he/she enjoys playing games, you’re a loving failure of a parent and should immediately kill yourself. Loving faggots.

    [Ed Note: Nice language, Anon.]

    Comment by Anon — October 20, 2007 @ 5:41 pm | Reply

  131. Brownback? More like wetback. This article is horsepucky.

    [Ed Note: The Senator is neither a spic nor a mexi-fry.]

    Comment by Wetback — October 20, 2007 @ 5:43 pm | Reply

  132. What the hell happened to the Senator himself?

    Don’t say he’s “busy” because that’s bullpoop.

    The entire government does nothing.

    Comment by Shkrigglynufft — October 20, 2007 @ 6:28 pm | Reply

  133. Whoa, great work.

    I wasn’t gonna vote for Brownback anyway, but you did a really good job sealing that up.

    Comment by The Great Butler — October 20, 2007 @ 7:25 pm | Reply

  134. Dear Ethnic Slur from Comment 131: (I REFUSE to use that sort of vile hatespeak under any circumstances)

    This article is beyond horse-hockey and all the way into horse-Olympic-Decathlon. I’ve never seen so much tripe outside of a butcher’s shop.

    Comment by Confused — October 20, 2007 @ 7:32 pm | Reply

  135. Oh my god. XD This is the biggest piece of Bullpoop I have ever seen.

    “makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires”
    What the heck?! What kind of sick person would interpret it like that. I suppose King King trying to “satisfy his bestial desires” in King Kong.

    “the slogan for this evil piece of “hardware” is “Touching is good.””
    Yes, I admit. That was a bit of a mistake on the part of Nintendo’s marketing to choose “Touching is good.” as a slogan, but as you can see Nintendo no longer uses “Touching is good.” as their DS Slogan anymore. [Ed Note: No we can't.]

    “Pedochat”‘s Signal can only reach ~30 feet. If you have a pedophile 30 feet within you, he’s probably your neighbour.

    [Ed Note: Fox News proved that to be an absolute lie. Watch the video.]

    Sincerly,
    A now extreme P.O.ed Gamer

    Comment by OH MY GOD — October 20, 2007 @ 9:51 pm | Reply

  136. bunghat.
    do you think taking everything out of perspective is going to loving solve anything?
    you’re going to hear swears on television.
    if your kids use the computer they’re going to see inappropriate material.
    even regular magazines have

    not to mention, you haven’t checked your facts
    you’re just making up everything on your opinion alone.

    Comment by Steven — October 20, 2007 @ 10:01 pm | Reply

  137. JOE when u were a kid this was quite normal:
    http://oldies.about.com/od/rockabill1/f/jerryleemyra.htm

    Comment by Virolak — October 20, 2007 @ 11:01 pm | Reply

  138. that dose bring bak mamories thanx viro

    Comment by JOE — October 20, 2007 @ 11:28 pm | Reply

  139. “convinced (pestered)”

    Yeah, real nice on showing kids respect bunghole.

    Comment by Ross Castro — October 21, 2007 @ 12:05 am | Reply

  140. Lulz

    Comment by Lami — October 21, 2007 @ 3:34 am | Reply

  141. Wow. 4chan, Something Awful…which parody site are you going to quote next? Anyone who uses the wonderful brainpower God gave us knows good and well that those are not reliable sources of information. If you look through Something Awful you will see grotesque parodies of Christianity, the See Spot Run books, and in this case, the use of a touch screen in a video game.

    You know, I’m pretty sure someone will come up with an inappropriate and disturbing use for dominoes at some point, if it hasn’t been done already. When are you going to take action to ban dominoes so that someone doesn’t abuse them in an unhealthy way?

    Next to the soul, the greatest gift God has given us is a rational mind, to help us determine what is right, what is wrong, and who can and cannot be trusted for information. It’s a pity you bury this talent in the sand instead of reaping the rewards.

    Comment by a TRUE Christian — October 21, 2007 @ 7:18 am | Reply

  142. Man, this blog is pure gold. I’m actually grateful you decided to take it out on videogames, I wouldn’t have come across it otherwise. I’m willing to justify the existence of a mindset like this in a secluded town in some valley impossible to reach or escape from, but I would be thinking of some farmer who never saw a computer let alone a light bulb in his life. Unreal. the sad thing is that’s probably a fabricated opinion to win the support of hordes of farmers like that. ah, what’s the world coming to..

    Comment by Kyle Rayner — October 21, 2007 @ 9:24 am | Reply

  143. I think its funny how this little comment box down here asks you for your email address and name(just another way for those molesters to get at you, eh?).

    If you honestly think that a child molester would buy a Nintendo DS and sit around on PictoChat, hoping that another kid with a DS would walk by while using PictoChat, you really need to rack up the meds. I mean, you would only get on PictoChat if you knew that your friend would be on it, so what are the chances. Also, about the Update 5. That is not a typical DS game, and you must understand the difference between the United States and Japan. An ocean is not the only thing that seperates us…

    [Ed Note: Oceans no longer protect us.]

    Comment by Anonymous — October 21, 2007 @ 10:17 am | Reply

  144. I hate american foreign policy, you think you can act as world police and attack other contries beacuse you think that they may have wmd:s. Iran have wmd:s so why dont you attack already? [Ed Note: Agreed. It's time to nuke Iran.] you are only after the oil arent you? USA=Beast of Revelation. oh by the way! i love japan!

    (ps: i dont have anything against us people)

    [Ed Note: Don't mind us people.]

    Comment by Tarzan — October 21, 2007 @ 1:59 pm | Reply

  145. hahaha, this is a golden article. I love it! OH NOES, VIDEOGAMES R TEH DEVIL!

    [Ed Note: There is much truth in what you say, hahaha.]

    Look, there may be alot of crap in gaming, but I’m 99% sure the Nintendo DS is not due to the fall, OR a precursor to the end of the world. Also, Reggie is not the antichrist.

    Comment by hahaha — October 21, 2007 @ 3:13 pm | Reply

  146. my god what bullpoop.
    if this guy becomes president of usa i will join to al qaeda.

    [Ed Note: So are you going to blow yourself up?]

    Comment by Himmler — October 21, 2007 @ 3:18 pm | Reply

  147. yes i blow myself up whit brownback and his family. then i get 10 (or was it 12?) maidens!
    (i doubt that he has any family)

    [Ed Note: He has a beautiful wife and five children. Shows how much you know, Nazi.]

    Comment by Himmler — October 21, 2007 @ 3:31 pm | Reply

  148. btw mister editor. what do you think about videogames and anime?

    [Ed Note: Teh suxx0rz.]

    Comment by Himmler — October 21, 2007 @ 3:38 pm | Reply

  149. “He has a beautiful wife and five children. Shows how much you know, Nazi.”

    idiot. its islam.

    [Ed Note: Okay. Shows how much you know, islam. I thought Himmler was a Nazi name.]

    Comment by Himmler — October 21, 2007 @ 4:18 pm | Reply

  150. You people are idiots.

    1. The DS Pictochat works at any distance, but it can only RECIEVE messages at 65 ft. At any time it can send messages.

    2. Monkey Donkey? You people are deranged. And what do you mean by “beastly desires”?! Donkey Kong was based off of King Kong, and the only way you’d not know what King Kong was about (a giant gorilla who falls in LOVE -not bed- with a young woman)is if you’ve been living under a rock. Wait, no, under the ocean.

    3. The touching is good slogan, NOTHING to do with pervertedness!

    “Oh geez, I dunno why the slogan would be ‘touching is good’, unless… THEY WANT PEDOPHILES, THATS THE ONLY POSSIBLE EXPLANATION!”

    …or maybe it has something to do with a TOUCH SCREEN?

    4. PSP: sick innuendo name? Okay, I’ll admit it, they’ve used the name “Playstation” too many times for consoles, but it ain’t that sick.

    5. “Right (maybe), wrong, wrong, wrong and wrong. Let me reiterate: video games should not be on your Christmas list this year, or any year. Parents need to be aware of this and other dangers and need to just say no.”

    Why? So people would have an excuse to visit your store? Or maybe so people would fall under Whack Thomspoons (Jack Thompson) spell. People play video games to do something they can’t in real life. Like Zelda, you are a young hero who has to gather his sword and shield to fight evil, save the princess, and save the day? How often does that happen everyday? What about Halo? When in real life will some kid have a chance to become a super-soldier and save the Earth and have a kick-ass action-packed time while doing it?
    And don’t say “Well, what about Porn games? A six year old wouldn’t get legally laid unless he had a video game!” Dude, your not gonna find a Porn game unless YOU MAKE IT YOURSELF! I don’t think any perverted 6 yeard could do that.

    6. The only true thing Jack said in that interview is that the store shouldn’t be selling to kids who don’t match the rating. THAT’S IT.

    7. The system which Pac-Man appeared on had limited graphics. The best they could do was a little pixel to show the power pill. The reason they never changed this when the series went on to systems with better graphics was to give it a classic feel. Also, in an interview i read from Namco (company behind pac-man), he was given the name because his character design had boxing gloves and he could “pac” a punch. And I’ve never heard Pac-Man and Tu-Pac in the same sentence before.

    8. Touch Wizzy Get Dizzy was a hack of a game.

    It’s kind of sad. You people just got beat by a 13 year old.

    [Ed Note: Well, what about Porn games? A six year old wouldn’t get legally laid unless he had a video game!]

    Comment by feh, not telling you. — October 21, 2007 @ 6:57 pm | Reply

  151. sdffdg this is great

    I got a good laugh out of this

    a really good one fsfdsfdsfd

    Comment by AAAAAA — October 21, 2007 @ 8:57 pm | Reply

  152. also I’d like to mention making Nintendo look bad won’t work very well.

    As they are the biggest video game company in the world.

    Comment by AAAAAA — October 21, 2007 @ 8:58 pm | Reply

  153. SHOUTOUT TO PT BTW

    [Ed Note: Enough out of you.]

    Comment by AAAAAA — October 21, 2007 @ 9:06 pm | Reply

  154. I’m still here btw

    [Ed Note: Congratulations.]

    Comment by AAAAAA — October 21, 2007 @ 9:31 pm | Reply

  155. Not very nice to censor my friend.
    Even further, that’s a direct violation of the first amendment.

    [Ed Note: Wrong. This is our place, not yours. You have no right to free speech in someone else's home. We are under no obligation to display the profanity of others. Try again, Einstein.]

    You need to learn to spell check and grammar check your articles, otherwise it makes you appear rather stupid.

    Although, you’re doing that pretty well on your own.

    “Video Game Expert” Jack Thompson?
    HAH!
    Video Game Critic.
    He’s just a confused fool wandering blindly into the era of technology.
    Touching is good is directly related to the idea of the DS, the second screen that is a touch screen.

    Attempt to put up a good argument next time, please.

    ((SHOUT OUT TO PT – ODDY))

    [Ed Note: What's next? Song requests?]

    Comment by BBBBBB — October 21, 2007 @ 9:34 pm | Reply

  156. http://tinyurl.com/fgd3x

    [Ed Note: Do not follow this link to the disgusting image, goatse, unless you want to lose your lunch. You are a sick person, Jake.]

    Comment by Jake butts — October 21, 2007 @ 9:35 pm | Reply

  157. thats my naruto website go to it pls

    Comment by Jake butts — October 21, 2007 @ 9:38 pm | Reply

  158. Well I have to admit this quite a humorous article. When I first began to read it I became skeptical about the product…. bullcrap! The reason they have that slogan is because of the touch screen. Yeah it incourages touching… OF SCREENS! I have yet to know one person who has come in contact with a ped on the DS. You would have to be within in a fifty feet [as I see above it's 65 feet] of the person and have wi-fi. The only spot my DS works with the chat is at school [i'm 17 and i'm a senior] and anothering….

    Comment by a person laughing — October 21, 2007 @ 9:50 pm | Reply

  159. “Well, what about Porn games? A six year old wouldn’t get legally laid unless he had a video game!”
    I would like to note that Nintendo has never released a game of pornographic material (other than 3rd party games released on their system, and even then, I highly doubt there were any aside from some light innuendo- and those games never left japan), and the “witch touching” game never made it out of japan.

    You’re an overreacting muck. You cannot get raped using a DS game, seeing as the only chat that you can talk to random people on reaches only 65 feet (If you can’t see the mucking pedophile coming then you’re blind or retarded or something)

    Then there’s the online system. There is NO WAY to contact a stranger, because the online system uses a “friend code” exchange system, so the only way they could get the code is if they previously knew the person they were chatting with. Yes, you can get someone’s code by chatting with them online, but uh, that would be your fault for allowing your child on the internet and not Nintendo’s fault.

    By the way, Your theory on the “Touching is good” slogan is complete bollocks, slogans are nothing more than a mere catchphrase in order to get attention, so if innuendo was intended, it was for attention, not to tell a child to rape someone.

    Video games are not harmful- get that through your head. Oh sure, Columbine happened and OH heCK THEY JUST SO HAPPENED TO PLAY DOOM IN THEIR PAST TIME THAT TOTALLY mUCKING MEANS THAT IT’S RELATED RITE GUYS????? LOL LAWSUIT VIDYA GAEMS ARE EVIL- No, they were already psychologically unstable, no one is going to go out and commit mass murder because of a bunch of pixels moving on a screen, most people have this thing called common sense, and you, apparently, do not.

    Comment by Chocolate Milk — October 21, 2007 @ 10:04 pm | Reply

  160. Disregard the previous, I suck rocks.

    Good going, anon. 10/10

    Comment by Chocolate Milk — October 21, 2007 @ 10:10 pm | Reply

  161. post #150 made me giggle like an idiot
    good job poster #150 >:C

    Comment by nick — October 21, 2007 @ 11:06 pm | Reply

  162. This is extremely interesting, albeit woefully ignorant.

    I was at first inclined to see this as a troll website, but now I think otherwise. Please pick up a book that is not named the Bible for once, so you can actually acknowledge for yourself that there is a real world out there.

    I can’t say whether reading the article itself or the feeble attempts to defend its stance is more amusing than the other. A good laugh nonetheless.

    Comment by "L" — October 21, 2007 @ 11:22 pm | Reply

  163. All this hate is mindblowing. Aren’t you guys supposed to love your fellow man like you love yourself?
    I think the TWO positive feedbacks this article had are pretty indicative of the general opinion.
    I’m pretty sure Jesus would love videogames, anyway.

    Comment by Kyle Rayner — October 21, 2007 @ 11:37 pm | Reply

  164. Lol, Jack Thompson is a video game expert? But shouldn’t people be more worried about the stuff on the internet and how easy it is for anyone to access it? And one last thing…
    ALL HAIL THE GOPHER KING!!

    Comment by Gopher King — October 22, 2007 @ 12:15 am | Reply

  165. I’M DR. OCTAGONAPUSS!!! BLAAAAAAAAGH!!!

    Comment by Dr. Octagonapuss — October 22, 2007 @ 12:17 am | Reply

  166. Amazing simply amazing, the 100yard(in perfect condition) will surely allow perverts to come into contact with your children. We don’t have the internet this is a world made up in the mind of people like “video game expert” Jack Thompson who displays no knowledge into a field he claims to be knowledgeable. You mean violent games may have a negative effect on children? Tell me more Freud.

    Truth be told there are FAR worse things kids can get into, drugs, gangs,stealing, grand theft auto(not the game). Most of these things occur in the “Safe” outdoors, without the nintendo DS that evil(sarcastic) machine. They’re more likely to get in trouble on the walk to and from school than they are to on Pictochat.(I seriously know of nobody that actually uses it and if a pedophile is within 300 feet, you had problems LONG before the DS came into the equation) The trick is for parents to share a little time and know what their children are into. Tough yeah but you have to keep up on it, there’s a big booklet in the DS box that says PICTOCHAT and explains it in and out. For god sakes stop trying to pass the blame and step up for yourself, it’s your kid.

    As a note I’m a 22 year old living on my own supporting myself through school. I’ve never committed a crime or gotten even a speeding ticket. I’m one of those “poorly adjusted”(Sarcastic) videogame players. I’ve been playing since 3 years of age till current day and I wouldn’t dare give it up.

    Some studies are showing videogames can slow the process of age on the brain, helping keep mental clarity, hand eye coordination and dexterity to name a few benefits. It’s not for everybody though, some people are just pre-disposed to take bad influence from ANYTHING and the same results will come no mater what they do. Try to sit with your kids, talk to them, find out what’s up in their lives and they’ll be all the better for it.

    Comment by rob — October 22, 2007 @ 1:08 am | Reply

  167. This is probably the most hilarious thing I’ve ever read. No hyperbole, I’m totally serious. You have no clue whatsoever what you are talking about.

    The part about Pac-Man was so completely, amazingly factually incorrect I am surprised it didn’t cause some sort of rift in the time-space continuum. Pac-Man named after Tupac, despite the fact that it was released about 12 years before Tupac gained fame? Tupac as in ‘you pack heat’? Tupac is his given, birth name, for Pete’s sake!

    You also seem to have some bizarre sexual fixation, considering how often you imply sexual meanings on completely innocuous things.

    At least I learned one thing; paedophiles can apparently drive AND use Pictochat at the same time. Amazing!

    Thanks for the laugh!

    Comment by Ben Giesen — October 22, 2007 @ 5:48 am | Reply

  168. this thread is disgusting to wade thru with all of the greasy ‘gamers’ defending thier sicko obsession. the ds isn’t even as bad as the other nintendo machine, the ‘Wii’. hmmmm named after male gentals and uses a controller shaped like, well you get the idea. and stupid parents are actually lettin gtheir kids play with these things, sick sick SICK!!!! good job to the original writer, wish there were more like you would take on these liberal companies.

    [Ed Note: That's a good point. Wii. How disgusting.]

    Comment by NinenDONT — October 22, 2007 @ 11:19 am | Reply

    • Wii as in “we” “us” “playing together as a family” You are, in fact, the sick tormented soul. “uses a controller shaped like, well you get the idea.” No, actually, I didn’t have any ideas about that until you gave me that very shocking one. It’s a damn TV remote. Are you serious? GTFO.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 11:44 pm | Reply

  169. This is hilarious!!! I definitely like how Pac Man was supposedly named after Tupac Shakur, who was 9 years old when Pac Man was first released! Seriously, crap like this from fanatics like the writer of this article are what ruins campaigns. Sure, there are nut jobs out there that agree with this crap, but the other 99% of the legal voters in the country are completely scared away from a candidate by reading this crap. While I know these aren’t the words of Sam Brownback, the mere thought of him even partially agreeing with this would make me never vote for him…not that it matters now. Well, like many have already said, please do keep up the good work, people are getting a real kick out of this!

    Comment by Rob — October 22, 2007 @ 11:46 am | Reply

  170. You know, your ramblings and ability to create a sexual innuendo out of absolutely everything kind of makes me question your true, um, interests. You might want to talk to a professional before you fall victim to the very vices you seem so “skeered” of.

    My son has a Nintendo DS and a Wii. (An aside here, but I’ve never heard of the male anatomy being called that. Maybe you have because someone was referring the actual size of your manhood?) I have no respect for parents who toss the kids a game and leave them on their own. My husband and I shop carefully for games to make sure the content is age appropriate and often play the games extensively with our son. That ensures two things…we know what the game involves and we can discuss any aspect of the game with him.

    As for the “oh-my-god-the-sky-is-falling-and-its-raining-pedophiles” points you tried so hard to make? Whew…thanks for the laugh!

    [Ed Note: How many Christian games have you purchased for your son, and what are their names?]

    Comment by NintendoMom — October 22, 2007 @ 12:22 pm | Reply

    • Editor, can you make an attempt to be coherent when someone makes a valid argument?

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 11:47 pm | Reply

    • oh, hey, i went and found this for you. It’s a christian game….

      http://www.jesusdressup.com/

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 11:49 pm | Reply

  171. “with all of the greasy ‘gamers’ defending thier sicko obsession”

    How is it sick? Not all video games are graphic or violent.

    “the ‘Wii’. hmmmm named after male gentals”

    That’s a pretty baseless claim. Got any proof?

    “and uses a controller shaped like, well you get the idea.”

    Dude. It’s shaped like a remote. It’s called a “Wii Remote”. Put two and two together.

    “wish there were more like you would take on these liberal companies.”

    I lol’d.

    Comment by Tinlion — October 22, 2007 @ 12:28 pm | Reply

  172. No. Just no.

    Comment by NintendoGamer — October 22, 2007 @ 1:04 pm | Reply

  173. Christian Games. Sounds like fun.

    Comment by Kyle Rayner — October 22, 2007 @ 1:41 pm | Reply

  174. ‘That’s a pretty baseless claim. Got any proof?’

    duh, just look at the name? what do you think it means?

    ‘How is it sick? Not all video games are graphic or violent.’

    most of them are tho and you know it too. but hey i guess if you get a thrill from beating up hookers and killing cops that’s ok. anything goes right?

    Comment by NinenDONT — October 22, 2007 @ 2:14 pm | Reply

    • “what do you think it means?”
      I think it means we as in us. You know, you and me. Do you play monopoly alone? No? Who plays monopoly? Oh, that’s right, Wii do.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 11:52 pm | Reply

  175. “duh, just look at the name? what do you think it means?”

    Thats still not proof, it’s just you saying what you think it means. And what don’t people get about it’s not real? It’s like you think we’re actually out there shooting cops.

    Comment by Hamtaro — October 22, 2007 @ 2:35 pm | Reply

  176. Ha….HAHAHAH, reading this made me laugh so damn hard

    Comment by Brad — October 22, 2007 @ 3:19 pm | Reply

  177. You guys are sad. Ok I can see why your all “Meh!!!!!!! Grand Theft Auto = bad for kids!!!!!!!!” But you do understand that in Grand Theft Auto you can do good things too. There are Firetruck missions when you rescue people and out out fires and vigilante missions to stop bad people. Thats just a couple of example of the good missions you can do in the game. Most kids choose to go down the bad side. The real question here isn’t “Is this game making my kid bad due to in-game violence?” the real question is “Is my kid the one being bad in the first place without the influence of the game?” Also you guys need to stop talking about what you have no clue about. Pac Man has nothing to do with the word puck as post number 150 says. I know who made post #150 and I agree with him completely.

    Comment by Lunyka — October 22, 2007 @ 5:35 pm | Reply

  178. wow, hmm where to begin, Tupac’s first album was released way later than the videogame Pac-Man… Please do some research. The NDS has not sold 700 million copies, it has sold around 50 million from the latest gaming sale charts. You made Donkey Kong sexual somehow which is just amazing, you really need to get your head out of the gutter and stop thinking of perverted stuff. Also the Playstation Pornable, you know it would be easier putting porn on an iPod or other software which holds more pictures plus PSP transfers are a hassle, you’d have to be sick and have a lot of time on your hands if you wanted to put sick stuff on your PSP. Nonetheless you should be ashamed of yourself because almost everything you said was non-factual. If only Nintendo would send you Brain Age and make you a tad smarter. Also how is pictochat, worse than an online irc or chat room? Oh wait you can actually send pictures online and you can access porn sites easily online. I don’t see your point. The Nintendo DS is a great handheld system with many great games, and it has a low percentage of M rated games (which is fine, since adults want to play games too). I have shown this “article”(more of a rant/terrible excuse of the english language) to many fellow gamers and even people who do not have much knowledge of games and they all thought this was from the Onion (but then it would have to have facts behind it and be funny). Oh and calling Jack Thompson an expert? How many court cases has he won? Oh wait… none. Also if you are buying games for family members i suggest you do research on the ESRB rating system, go to the official site for the game, and check out gamerdad.com a nice game site that reviews games, gives an un-biased opinion and tells how family-appropriate it is.

    Comment by ttwashere — October 22, 2007 @ 5:46 pm | Reply

  179. Sorry to double post, but a few other things:
    Tupac was his birth name, not slang for to pack heat.
    His first mainstream album came out in 1981.
    Pac-Man came out in 1980.
    Too many infactuals to correct.
    -Seacrest Out! err TT Out!

    Comment by ttwashere — October 22, 2007 @ 5:49 pm | Reply

  180. Please, all of you leaving comments. There is no getting through to people this stupid. No amount of thought, intelligent writing, or rationality will change their opinions. Instead, just make their blood boil by doing the only thing they can’t control, but have to look at: spam.

    [Ed Note: Don't look now, but it seems you just left a comment, dummy.]

    Comment by ciano — October 22, 2007 @ 6:16 pm | Reply

    • yes, a comment for other commentors to read, not for you to read. You can read it, but it will nothing for you. As for others who read it, they can HERF DERP HERRRRRRRRRR….

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 8, 2012 @ 11:58 pm | Reply

  181. But Mr. Ed Note they are just trying to speak to the other commenters. Not yourself. It was stupid to put a note in such a comment.

    Comment by Lunyka — October 22, 2007 @ 6:53 pm | Reply

  182. Dude, keep up the good work, this site is hilarious.

    As to the rest of you…*snigger* BWAHAHAHAHA

    Comment by Baramos — October 22, 2007 @ 11:43 pm | Reply

  183. Sheesh. Don’t blame the video games for corrupting kids. Violent and sexual materials will always exist, and it’s the parents responsibility to make sure that the kids don’t experience it. This situation certainly isn’t unique to video games.

    Also, I’m still amused by your toting this as a “family friendly” blog. I didn’t click any of the links, but I’m guessing they’re far worse than some of the language you censored out.

    [Ed Note: You didn't click any of the links yet you're making a judgement based on ignorance. Well played! You sound like a perfect liberal! The foul language you find on other sites isn't found here. And I think we're better for it.]

    Comment by Nameless — October 22, 2007 @ 11:44 pm | Reply

    • Lemme guess, nameless. Conservative? Thought so.

      Comment by anonymous — May 25, 2009 @ 6:48 pm | Reply

  184. I don’t know whats worse for America, ultra left wings or ultra right wings… either way, I’m buying San Andreas simply out of contempt for this article. I’ll make sure to find the original version w/the “hot coffee” minigame on it just for you(N/M the fact that “hot coffee” requires a $40 cheat device to activate.) Now if you don’t mind I’ll be hunting vampires on my DS with a man hired by the Catholic Church and his witch assistant.

    Comment by Khanscott — October 23, 2007 @ 2:35 am | Reply

  185. To the writer editing the above post: You chastise him for making a judgement based on ignorence, when you clearly know nothing about video games yourself?

    You fail, good sir. Fail hard.

    Comment by Anonymous — October 23, 2007 @ 5:12 am | Reply

  186. [Ed Note: You didn’t click any of the links yet you’re making a judgement based on ignorance. Well played! You sound like a perfect liberal! The foul language you find on other sites isn’t found here. And I think we’re better for it.]

    Except for the word “p!ss,” which you consistantly refuse to censor for no good reason. If a word for excrement is censor-worthy, why not a word for ur!ne?

    [Ed Note: Happy now?]

    Comment by a TRUE Christian — October 23, 2007 @ 8:06 am | Reply

  187. First of all: That Ron Jeremy photo has nothing to do with the DS or the DS’s advertisements.

    Second of all: Kids are sexually curious. Kids start exploring their bodies at a young age, it’s a part of life. Accept it.

    Third of all, don’t whine about something if you’re not even going to do your homework on it. Base your opinions on facts and research, not first-looks and assumptions.

    Fourth of all, stop wrapping kids up in cotton wool. They won’t be kids forever, you know.

    Finally: Psycheout, you need to do something about that technophobia problem.

    Comment by Dann Woolf — October 23, 2007 @ 8:58 am | Reply

  188. ‘And what don’t people get about it’s not real? It’s like you think we’re actually out there shooting cops.’

    oh i see, it’s not ‘real’ so it can include whatever perversion you want. i guess we should hand out porno to kids too, after all it’s not ‘real’, they’re just ‘actors.’ typical liberal living in la-la land.

    Comment by NintenDONT — October 23, 2007 @ 9:14 am | Reply

  189. Are you kidding me?? Talk about fear-mongering propaganda.

    The pictochat feature can only be used with other DS’s that are in range which quite frankly is limited. Not that a perv couldn’t send a message to a young person within range, I just don’t believe it happens that way.

    And to say that PacMan is responsible for increased use of acid and ecstasy is just plain stupidity, and framing Donkey Kong as a game based on sexual perversion is just as laughable.

    If this really is a Brownback supported web site he must be an idiot too.

    Comment by progrmr — October 23, 2007 @ 10:09 am | Reply

  190. So, wait. Kids seeing one bad word will corrupt them more than seeing child molestation, masturbation, games where the sole objective is to grope girls, and pornography?

    Comment by Nameless — October 23, 2007 @ 12:51 pm | Reply

  191. “duh, just look at the name? what do you think it means?”

    I have no idea, but if you would actually do some research (I congratulate you if you do, no one on this blog seems to be able to research anything for some stupid reason) and look at Nintendo’s track record, you’d see that they don’t release many violent or sexual games. And don’t say that Nintendo made all the “perverted” games on the DS. Third-party companies did it.

    “most of them are tho and you know it too. but hey i guess if you get a thrill from beating up hookers and killing cops that’s ok. anything goes right?”

    1. Excuse me? I HATE those kinds of games! Puzzles and platformers are the way I roll.
    2. See the first part of this comment. Again, if you actually did some research, you’d find that most games are at least non-violent and non-sexual.

    “oh i see, it’s not ‘real’ so it can include whatever perversion you want. i guess we should hand out porno to kids too, after all it’s not ‘real’, they’re just ‘actors.’ typical liberal living in la-la land.”

    1. If it’s not real, then it isn’t really hurting anyone, is it? No.
    2. Actually, porno is real. Real people really fornicating. In a real magazine. It’s real, all right.
    3.And YOU’RE a typical conservative living in Conservative Mega-Christian Oh-My-Goodness-It’s-A-Video-Game-Burn-The-Witchcraft Land.

    Comment by Tinlion — October 23, 2007 @ 12:58 pm | Reply

  192. “video game expert Jack Thompson”

    BWAHAHAHAHAHA

    Man you’re such a freaking idiot.

    Comment by LOL — October 23, 2007 @ 1:28 pm | Reply

  193. Just some things in response:

    Well Jacko Thumbsuck (Jack Thompson), or whoever I may address you as, all I can say is this is a pitiful attempt at making a punch at the game industry. Stalkers aren’t just found on “these digital doohickies”. My friends love videogames and have a NintendoDS, does that make them sickos as well? So please, research on both views instead of a blatent Biased stream of garbage like most over left/right wing extremists.

    And as for “She deftly ripped the offending device out of her hands, sent the reply “stay away from my baby, you psycho” and triumphantly snapped the unit in half. Nintendo TP (two pieces). It’s garbage now.”
    “Jill” could have returned those video games instead of smashing it, thanks for making more children in 3rd world countries die of starvation.

    [Ed Note: Well, if she had returned the unit, the next child would have been solicited too. Jill did the right thing in this case. That much is clear. She made a personal sacrifice for the greater good. That's actually pretty heroic.]

    Comment by Name (required) — October 23, 2007 @ 1:38 pm | Reply

  194. Please stop with the bashing. I love games and have been playing since i was six, yes i said that SIX!!!! I bet that if police raided whoever made this blog’s house they would find all sorts of gaming devices. seriously i dont think you have even played a game in your life. I have played shooters and killing games look at me i have not hurt anyone or done other wise. the reason people do this is because they do not realize the difference between real life and a game. When police searched the premesis of the virgina tech killer he DID NOT have a video game or even a PC yet jack thompson said that he “trained” on counter strike. HE DID’NT EVEN HAVE A GAME SYSTEM!!!!! So go crawl back into your hole and give up there are too many gamers and too little of you!

    Comment by Classified — October 23, 2007 @ 2:14 pm | Reply

  195. Ya know it was a good idea to tell the pedo to leave her alone, but the snapping it in half was very uncalled for.

    Comment by Hamtaro — October 23, 2007 @ 2:40 pm | Reply

  196. “[Ed Note: Well, what about Porn games? A six year old wouldn’t get legally laid unless he had a video game!]”

    The heck are you talking about?! that comment makes no sense!

    “HURR I HAVE A PORN GAME (which there aren’t any in the US sold in normal stores, if at all)” read comment 159, twit. take down your post. its a full of Babbling rubbish.

    even though this article is pure satire, and a waste of space.

    good Job.

    Comment by You Retard. — October 23, 2007 @ 2:47 pm | Reply

  197. How easy it is for us to heave the blame of absolute and utterly woeful parenting onto a simple piece of hardware. It is so god damn annoying to see mature, grown people react so ignorantly and blindly refuse to face up to the fact that they are too lazy to moniter what media their children have access to.

    People are to blame, not the videogames.
    I have played many ultraviolent games and never felt the urge to harm other human beings in the real world, that’s just me.
    There are people who cannot handle these games, and its up to themselves to resist playing them, or stop their kids from playing them, if they are emotionally disturbed.

    There was something wrong with them long before they picked up a controller.

    I also love all types of racing games, but never race people on the motorways, that is for racetracks/racedays.
    Friend of mine never played videogames in his life, he’s an absolute lunatic on the road.

    I dislike irresponsibility, you are promoting it with this, the exact opposite of what you set out to do. :P

    Comment by SullymAn — October 23, 2007 @ 3:07 pm | Reply

  198. You tard’. You must have had to take some time to make the names of the systems sound bad. I think YOU my dear moron are just making them perverted sounding… It is only perverted if you THINK of it like that… And the Nintendo Entertainment System has been out since the 80′s…. Yeah… Newfangled my ***.

    >.>

    Comment by My god (or lack thereof) — October 23, 2007 @ 4:11 pm | Reply

  199. Oh, and the Church of the flying Spaghetti Monster for the win! :P .

    Comment by My god (or lack thereof) — October 23, 2007 @ 4:13 pm | Reply

  200. GOATSE.CZ

    [Ed Note: No thanks. Once was enough.]

    Comment by Jake butts — October 23, 2007 @ 4:21 pm | Reply

  201. One thing that I thought about. If you are afraid your child will learn something bad from these (not really quoting) “tools of the devil”, then just watch what they are doing… Or take the console to work with you to make sure they arent doing things they aren’t supposed to on it (EG: pictochat). Give it back to them and make sure they are not chatting or whatever. There are more civilised ways to stop the predators from snatching the kids away than simply destroying the console…

    Comment by ... — October 23, 2007 @ 4:40 pm | Reply

  202. [Ed Note: You didn’t click any of the links yet you’re making a judgement based on ignorance. Well played! You sound like a perfect liberal! The foul language you find on other sites isn’t found here. And I think we’re better for it.]

    So, wait. Kids seeing one bad word will corrupt them more than seeing child molestation, masturbation, games where the sole objective is to grope girls, and pornography?

    (reposted since you couldn’t come up with an intelligent response, yet had time to complain about someone mentioning goatse)

    Comment by Nameless — October 23, 2007 @ 5:17 pm | Reply

  203. Seriously…Whoever made this post was stupid to label it as perverted.
    Besides even jack tompson would be that stupid even though he is the one whos doing it….he he

    Comment by Classified — October 23, 2007 @ 5:23 pm | Reply

  204. Mr. #194 I’ve been playing games since I was 3. I’m 16 years old now and I don’t feel any regret playing games. I’m not going to shoot up a school just cause I play violent video games. The kids who do that also suffer from mental problems too like Sociopathic tendencies mixed with a form of depression because if you haven’t notice most of them kill themselfs at the end. Video games was never the number one reason. If anything it was revenge against being bullied. Also The internet is more dangerous then a game system. You can’t send pictures of yourself to a pedophile over a Nintendo DS. The internet you can. If anything I’d rather my kid have a DS then computer access.

    Comment by Lunyka — October 23, 2007 @ 6:37 pm | Reply

  205. That was sad. Brilliant, but sad.

    Hopefully this was satire, or else I pray for your soul. They’ve done studies and there is no evidence whatsoever that gaming has any harmful effects on our children. Plus, there are ratings, I’d never in a million years by my 12 year old son a game rated “M”. If you’re scared of your child playing Grand Theft Auto, then why aren’t you scared of your son watching porn on the internet? It’s much easier to get. Should you snap your laptop in half as well? I agree with #204, the internet is much more dangerous than any gaming device will ever be. For all anyone knows, #100-something could be an eighty year old pedophile.

    Comment by Darren — October 23, 2007 @ 9:37 pm | Reply

  206. Me again. First, I’d like to point out that there are ratings and such to prevent kids from purchasing inappropriate videogames. That kids keep getting these games anyway isn’t something you can blame on the games themselves, or the companies that make them. The dipshots in stores who don’t care about checking IDs, and the parents who don’t care about the game’s content as long as their little “angel” keeps quiet, they are the people to blame.

    Second: 188 said “oh i see, it’s not ‘real’ so it can include whatever perversion you want. i guess we should hand out porno to kids too, after all it’s not ‘real’, they’re just ‘actors.’ typical liberal living in la-la land.”

    The cops in video games are just polygons with some textures slapped on. The actors in porn are real, living, breathing creatures. Your argument fails.

    Third: Why do people play video games in the first place? To do things they can’t do in real life. I love screwing around and causing mayhem in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, but I’m not stupid enough to pull that poop in the real world. I know I’d be in deep shit if I imitated Carl Johnson’s (GTA:SA’s protagonist) antics. I stick to causing virtual chaos, which has no consequenses whatsoever on the real world, and I’m happy with that.

    Fourth: Like I already said, ranting about something you know nothing about makes you look stupid. You can only Pictochat with others if they’re near you. The “touching is good” slogan is a reference to the DS’s touch screen, it has nothing to do with feeling up kids. And you’re right about that witch-hunting game, I’ll give you that. Every self-respecting gamer, myself included, thinks that game was a bad idea from the start.

    Finally: Life is full of risks and danger. That’s the way it is! Kids get hurt, they get bruises and cuts, inside AND outside the house. But they learn from it! Those little scabs and scrapes are just as important for kids as eating three meals a day and going to school!

    What I’m trying to say is yes, there are child predators on the internet. But child predators, and while I’m at it, drug dealers are well known for looking for potention victims at schools and playgrounds, too. But that doesn’t mean you should drag your kids indoors and forbid them from going outside. It means you should talk to your kids, you should warn them about these dangerous people, on the internet or in real life. Explain to your kids how to deal with child predators. Forewarned is forearmed.

    [Ed Note: Please watch your language. This is a family-friendly website, not a rap video. Word.]

    Comment by Dann Woolf — October 24, 2007 @ 4:23 am | Reply

    • Dear Editor,

      Please grow up, we’re all mature adults here. Rap videos are hardly the only place on the the face of the planet where cursing happens, so stop trying to be clever. You just sound like a kindergarten teacher.

      You’re probably the most sexually deviant person among us.

      Comment by Blake Anthony Mother-Fucking Kleinberg, Come Argue With My Impeccable Logic, B-OTCH! — June 9, 2012 @ 12:17 am | Reply

  207. When I was a but a few summers old, (I’m 18 by the way) parents taught their kids things like “don’t talk to strangers, and don’t get into a stranger’s car” and “look both ways before you cross the street.” In those days, parents had common sense.

    That’s not the case anymore, and it makes me want to cry, and vomit, at the same time.

    Comment by Dann Woolf — October 24, 2007 @ 4:34 am | Reply

  208. “Video game expert, Jack Thompson”

    What does that moron know about games? He’s just as mis-informed and idiotic as you. Why don’t you do something productive, like go after real problems in society like drug abuse or keeping idiots (Read: You) getting into office.

    Comment by Kine — October 24, 2007 @ 12:07 pm | Reply

  209. Wow… this editor is as immature as the writer. “this is not a rap video” what a great comeback, now you just labeled 2 industries as terrible for kids. Hmm.. country music swears, rock music swears, electronica swears, but lets only target rap and hip-hop.

    Comment by ttwashere — October 24, 2007 @ 1:13 pm | Reply

  210. i’m italian, quindi se non capisci chiama un traduttore
    ma vai a cagare
    quante ne spari, ma sei scemo
    1° il nintendo ds ha una portata wi-fi di 10 metri e a questa distanza si può vedere la persona con cui si parla attraverso la pictochat.
    2° la nintendo pensa sempre ai bambini e li tutela.
    3° pacman non invoglia a drogarsi.
    4° se ti vengono in mente certe cose il pedofilo sei tu

    poi la violenza dei giochi non influenza i comportamnti, poi se voi americani vi fate condizionare avete problemi (vedi quegli studenti pazzi che entrano armati a scuola e fanno stragi, che è colpa vostra dato che in america e legale avere armi), anche i film contengono violenza.

    dato che le console sono portatrici di violenza, pornografia e pedofilia anche i pc e internet diffondono queste cose.

    ma non diciamo stronzate

    fate il lavaggio del cervello alla gente e ci mettete dentro ste cavolate assurde, avete dei disturbi voi, sempre con questi moralismi senza senso.
    ma quando la finirete di rompere?

    spero che la nintendo ti denunci per diffamazione e calunnia

    Comment by nintendo fan italiano — October 24, 2007 @ 7:15 pm | Reply

  211. Ima gunna 5w3ar now. ****, ****, ****, a**, mother-****er, b*tch b*stard, c***, t*ts, b**bies, meecrab, crap, donkey ***ing **** eater, h0rse ****er, pillow, pig-****er. LOL IM SO ****ING WITTY!!!!1!!1!3fsb

    Comment by 1337 5l — October 24, 2007 @ 7:42 pm | Reply

  212. THIS IS BULLheCK!

    Comment by Who Cares — October 24, 2007 @ 9:31 pm | Reply

  213. If you honest believe any of this tripe I feel so so sorry for you. Down Down Down the slippery slope of ignorance America goes, clutching its precious religious views that pushed it over the edge in the first place.

    Heres a thought Get rid of all your guns that you proudly tote as your right to carry. They pose more of a threat to your children than a DS. Stop trying to shield your kids from natural instinct. Surpress and demonise sex and your asking for trouble.

    Grow up America!

    Comment by Logical Aussie — October 24, 2007 @ 9:36 pm | Reply

  214. …this is just sad. You’re misrepresenting Brownback (I noticed that he doesn’t support this blog. Smart choice on his part), Christianity, Republicans, and America in general.

    Also, what’s the point of the “touching is good” picture? It’s obviously not from Nintendo (and thus doesn’t give any sort of accurate representation of Nintendo or the DS), it’s from some random person who hates Nintendo. The only purpose it serves is to mislead those who are taking this blog seriously, who are probably beyond hope.

    Comment by ... — October 25, 2007 @ 5:16 pm | Reply

  215. What the hell is this site? Its all about the parents. Think about it morons.

    Comment by Aggronite — October 28, 2007 @ 6:01 pm | Reply

  216. hellz yeah i dun raped dat princess bitch

    Comment by Donkey Kong — October 28, 2007 @ 6:38 pm | Reply

  217. “[Ed Note: How many Christian games have you purchased for your son, and what are their names?]”

    I love the implication here. Have you ever played Christian video games? Most of them are poorly made knock-offs of other games that are not even remotely entertaining. Now, if there were a St. Paul–Survive The Persecution! game, where you had to write letters to the Church, dodge Roman soldiers, and follow the angel out of prison, I’d definitely play that. Heck, it might even convert someone! But again, it would have to be coded by expert programmers, and designed to be engaging and immersive. Otherwise, it would flop, just like every other Christian game on the market.

    People don’t play games because they’re educational; they play games because they’re fun. A Christian game can only survive if it is both.

    Comment by a TRUE Christian — October 28, 2007 @ 7:38 pm | Reply

  218. “[Ed Note: Happy now?]” Yep. Laughing my socks off.

    Also, tinlion ,SullymAn, and Dan Woolf are right on about video games.

    and Aussie, the makers of this blog are the only ones on the planet who don’t realize yet that repressing someone’s natural sexual urges will only cause them to give in once the urges get too strong to be repressed. Far better to explain the physical and emotional consequences of sex, so they know why it should only be done in the proper context. “God said so-and-so is bad” only explains that it’s wrong, not why.

    Comment by a TRUE Christian — October 28, 2007 @ 7:53 pm | Reply

  219. You know, Whoever wrote this article is a complete freaking moron.
    Obviously in order for them to dream up such lies and allagations they must have one hell of a sick f*ed up mind. Seriously. Do yourselves a favor and ignore this idiot. Or I’ve got an even better Idea! ignore this dadgum site! It’s a joke! It’s not even f*ing funny.

    [Ed Note: Do as I say, not as I do, eh Anon?]

    Comment by Anon — October 29, 2007 @ 10:11 pm | Reply

  220. I don’t think that you even did any kind of research on this before you wrote it, so let me clear a few things up for you right now. When using the pictochat feature on the DS the radius for basically any kind of contact between two DS’s is maximum 30 feet (i should know because i have two Ds’s). And also “tu-pac” as you so gingerly called him kinda came out about 10 years after your ridiculous pac man drug craze. Your typical ds game is also one of those japanese games that would never be released in north amaerica , and if it ever were it would have gotten an AO rating from the ESRB (maybe you should look them up too jackass!) Little fact, should a game ever recieve an AO rating then that too would never be sold to the public because none of the companies who develop the systems permit that AO games get released on there systems. And I would also love to know exactly who your little gaming insiders are, and as far as Jack Thompson being a “Gaming Expert”…I don’t think so…My 94 year old grand mother is a better EXPERT on video games than he is. She specializes in knowing absolutly nothing about them, just like good ol’ Jackie T over here.

    Comment by to the idiot of this blog — October 30, 2007 @ 8:47 am | Reply

  221. Wow. Can’t believe this. I hope this is a troll, because my God, if it’s not.

    Anyway. Monkey Donkey, a rape and bestiality based children’s game. Wow. Last time I played Donkey Kong, you collected bananas and made it to the end of the level.

    Why are they worried about this whole Picto (“pedo”) chat business. If there’s a sex offender 300 feet from your house, you should be worried no matter what. Are we to stop children from running in the front yard for fear that a pedophile will cruise by and locate them? Is that not more dangerous?? Ironic and hypocritical idiocy is all this is.

    And that Jack Thompson guy makes me sick. Leave us alone you sick bastard. Just let us play our games. If you don’t like em, don’t let your kids buy them. No need to play World Policeman.

    Play Station Pornable? Save me, please. Perhaps we should ban blank CD’s, DVD’s and USB drives from being marketed, cos you can just as easy download porn, put it on a flash drive, and take it to school. The stupidity of these people astounds me.

    Comment by Very Sad — November 1, 2007 @ 5:31 am | Reply

  222. comment by psycheout “I must have hit a nerve. The truth hurts and makes people angry sometimes. Rest assured that B4B will never shy from the truth.”

    this from the biggest liar in the world,, care to try and prove you tell the truth psyche? of course not, you are a liar, an idiot, and a psycho. Even if you are just kidding, you’re still lying, and if you are serious, then you are the stupidist person alive.

    Comment by Arn Lewis — November 1, 2007 @ 5:57 am | Reply

  223. Well, I think 10% is true. I’m 18 and play the Nintendo DS and so does my mom (Yes she needs to be shot D:). Anyway, I barely use the picto chat unless I’m at school and feel like drawing and showing off Anime. Children should be warned about pedos and the likes, but they are and they will never learn. I just told my mom this and she was like “one day they’ll ban the DS for too many abductions” xd. If your kid ever says hi to a stranger, ban them from picto chat don’t break it @_@. Just return it then and get game credit? I dunno. DS is the only game system I know that has picto chat and voice chat. Get A wii pls <3

    Comment by Melee — November 1, 2007 @ 9:22 am | Reply

  224. Oh one more thing. The news person could have been lying but maybe he had lag? o_o. I went across the cafeteria (about 100ft) then got kicked out.

    Comment by Melee — November 1, 2007 @ 9:26 am | Reply

  225. [...] gotten a lot of good feedback from concerned parents regarding my article over at B4B exposing the Nintendo DS (with it’s pedochat feature) and the Playstation Pornable.  Many parents expressed shock [...]

    Pingback by Video Game Perversion « Blogs 4 Conservatives — November 1, 2007 @ 11:42 am | Reply

  226. You honestly can’t be this close-minded and ill-informed. I’m guessing you’re just warping the truth, to make it seem worse than it really is.

    Either that, or you’re getting your information from retarded monkeys.

    Comment by God — November 3, 2007 @ 8:47 am | Reply

  227. You know, I was going to go on a rant that would contain more intellegence than the report in front of me, but I think a simple link would suffice quite nicely:
    http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/02/09

    Comment by Anonymous — November 5, 2007 @ 9:22 pm | Reply

  228. [...] peoples’ minds, be a portal straight to hell. Some of this hatred seemed to be supported by Blogs for Brownback, which cited numerous reports that we covered in the [...]

    Pingback by Go Nintendo » Blog Archive » DS bashing political site was the real deal- What are you waiting for? — November 7, 2007 @ 4:16 pm | Reply

  229. I can’t believe you wasted your time writing an article comprised of lies and decipt about a videogame console. Have you no life?

    Comment by Jared sol — November 7, 2007 @ 4:30 pm | Reply

  230. Newfanfled NES? lol.

    Comment by Aly — November 7, 2007 @ 5:35 pm | Reply

  231. Ever think that child predators were children once too?

    Comment by Ampersand — November 7, 2007 @ 8:05 pm | Reply

  232. I agree with this author whole heartily. It’s dispicable what parents are letting their children do these days. Playstation and Nintendo are both gateways to hell. I have confirmation that the leaders of both of these companys are heads of the world’s largest satanic church. Porn is of the Devil. All of you people defending these devil devices are going straight to hell. DS is actually an acronym for DEVIL SCREENS and PSP stands for PORTABLE SATANIC POWER. Smash your video games, and go to church on sunday to pray for forgiveness.

    [Ed Note: While your sentiment is laudable, we cannot link to your porno site. Sorry. I have updated your link to a more wholesome website. Perhaps there you will find the enlightenment that you need.]

    Comment by Brownshomie4life — November 7, 2007 @ 10:16 pm | Reply

  233. Best satirical piece. Evar.

    Comment by Guy — November 7, 2007 @ 10:51 pm | Reply

  234. I laughed out loud.

    This reminds me of the Brass Eye series.

    Comment by notazombie — November 9, 2007 @ 9:42 am | Reply

  235. [...] time we as a nation, as the people of the United States, said NO to Chicom made goods. Japan is bad enough. Now we have China to worry [...]

    Pingback by China Wants Your Kid « Blogs 4 Brownback — November 9, 2007 @ 8:03 pm | Reply

  236. [...] positive response to our investigative report on the sinful “touching is good” Nintendo DS. The torrent of parents who sent us email has demonstrated that, like with the Aqua Dots toy, [...]

    Pingback by Nintendo DS Followup « Blogs 4 Brownback — November 10, 2007 @ 8:55 pm | Reply

  237. Man, just go love yourselfe and suck some freakin lollipops that may fit perfectly in your area.

    so maybe you stop saying stuff like that

    [Ed Note: Watch your language, punk.]

    Comment by God — November 13, 2007 @ 8:31 pm | Reply

  238. [...] @ 2:42 pm Tags: Imagine Babies, Nintendo DS, pedo games And yet another pedo game for the “touching is good” pedochat Nintendo DS. It’s shocking that filth like this is sold right out in the [...]

    Pingback by Nintendo DS: Imagine Babies « Blogs 4 Brownback — November 14, 2007 @ 2:46 pm | Reply

  239. We’re all going to hell for playing Pokemon and reading Harry Potter anyways, right?
    And so… After we’re done chucking out stuff that could [i]possibly[/i] be satanic, we’re left with a Bible, and… that’s it, actually. (food could be European or even [i]Aisan[/i], clothes have satanic messages on them, and crosses can be turned upside-down.)
    And if you think it’s going to help kids stick with God by making their stress-reliever go bye-bye, you’re in for a surprise.
    Geez. I waisted ten minutes of my life at this site.

    [Ed Note: Even before chucking out all this rubbish, you still have The Bible. I suggest you check it out sometime. And at least that was ten minutes of your life not wasted on playing hentai games. This site truly does provide a valuable service. Now I'm convinced of that.]

    Comment by Bob — November 21, 2007 @ 7:53 pm | Reply

  240. What am I supposed to do with it, eat it? You seem to forget that people do need food and such.
    And what’ll happen when I die? Will God say, “Sorry, but you played video games (that are, by the way, rated no higher than T, and that’s the Sims), so you’ll go to Hell and be eternally damned for entertaining yourself?”

    Comment by Bob — November 22, 2007 @ 11:25 am | Reply

  241. ugh most irrational drivel i’ve ever read… Nintendo (makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires).

    I can do that too,
    Ford (one of the many makers of cars that results in many deaths world wide, rape in cars, sex in cars, drinking in cars, swearing in cars).
    Toyota (Same as above).
    Art (Form of activity that results in nudity which results in sex which results in hell) ban your child from drawing and art in any form i.e. creativity.
    Sport (Form of activity that results in gambling, competition thus greed and selfishness) ban your child from sports.
    Electricity (Source of power of all things evil) ban the use of electricity.
    Life (State of existence filled with Sin and dirty and immoral activities) ban your child from living.

    Ta daaaaa I like this game.

    Comment by pcgamer — November 26, 2007 @ 7:40 am | Reply

  242. You do realize this site is under the ‘humor’ section in my Favorites folder, right?

    Comment by Bob — November 28, 2007 @ 2:43 pm | Reply

  243. [...] snap any Kodomo no Jikan DVDs they find in their child’s collection in half, along with any Nintendo DS porno systems they discover during the [...]

    Pingback by Kodomo no Jikan: Unrestrained Pedo Fantasies « Blogs 4 Brownback — December 4, 2007 @ 7:27 pm | Reply

  244. OH WOW
    JAPAN MAKES MOLESTOR GAEM
    NEXT YOU’LL BE TELLING ME SEX MAKES BABIES

    Comment by ANONYMOOSE — December 5, 2007 @ 10:03 pm | Reply

  245. Quick comment: The Nintendo Wii, made by the same company as the DS, has numerous safety features to prevent children from being contacted by pedophiles using the device. Unless you pay to download an internet browser to the Wii (via the Wii Shop Channel, which parents can easily disable), there is only one way to contact people through your Wii: by inputting the 16-digit serial code of their Wiis into your Contacts list. And if you’re doing your job as a parent and keeping your prepubescent kids away from forums and harmful web sites, they won’t be able to get serial codes from anyone other than their local friends.

    All messages sent and received on a particular Wii can be viewed by anyone else who uses that Wii. However, they cannot be viewed by a third party on another Wii. This means that parents can easily click the little envelope icon and see every message that has been sent and received on their child’s machine. If your child makes or receives inappropriate comments on the device, you can find out quickly and easily, and give your kids the stern talking-to they deserve before it’s too late to save them.

    There is also a “Play Time” message automatically saved every day that records exactly how much time was spent using the Wii for any particular activity. (Sadly, it is not able to record playing time for Gamecube games, at least not on our machine. Hopefully this oversight will be remedied soon.) This message, which cannot be edited by the player, makes it easier for parents to ration out game time, preventing it from interfering with homework, prayer time, or extracurricular activities.

    These safety features were no doubt implemented after the unforeseen PictoChat incidents you have mentioned. Nintendo is a responsible company that does not seek to endanger any of the users of its products.

    Comment by L — December 5, 2007 @ 11:19 pm | Reply

  246. Thanks are due to the enigmatic L for this information. Nintendo is indeed a responsible company who values their customers, always have, always will. They make mistakes, yes, but Moses himself murdered someone. Nobody’s perfect, but when they make up for their errors, the least we can do is forgive.
    If you want to bash a gaming company that has no responsibility whatsoever, look at Sony. Please leave Nintendo alone.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 5, 2007 @ 11:59 pm | Reply

  247. Idiot, leave DK and pacman alone

    Comment by bull — December 24, 2007 @ 10:09 pm | Reply

  248. First of all, you people disgust me. You guys are like Michael Moore. Well, at least Michael Moore uses valid points and research that is true, and for that I admire him. The bad thing I compare you with Moore is that you guys are extremely biased. If you going to be talking about a Mariana-Trench deep subject like how bad video games are, then how are we the readers supposed to know the whole if you only show one half of the whole picture. Without the whole picture, how are non-gamers, and parents that don’t really know anything about technology and games supposed to look at the whole thing if you only give your part on it?

    Rest assure, I refuse to talk about anything the others have already talked. I mean, what’s the point of talking about something over and over again if the person refuses to change their opinion on it, alhtough I might want to talk about Jack Thompson.

    Now about Jack, he’s a bit cuckoo in the head, that I declared after his feud with Scott Ramsoomair, the artist of the parodical video game comic, VG Cats. You can look at e-mails exchanged between the two of them at http://www.vgcats.com/jack.php. Also, he really doesn’t make much sense. I mean, he tried to link Virginia Tech with Counter-Strike, which almost everyone, if not everyone, should know it is false. I mean, the guy was mental from the start. He lived in two different worlds at the same time. He demanded the cease and desist of Mortal Kombat: Armageddon, which is made by Midway, because a Kreate a Fighter option in the games would have enabled players to create a character that would look just like him and use that ‘Kreated’ fighter to, well, fight. I find many of his attempts to attack the video game industry futile. However, I find his attempts to stop minors from buying M and AO rated games to be valid (this idea which I will go over much more detail in your Nintendo DS Followup, and maybe in some of your anime-related articles). This is probably the only thing I agree with Thompson.

    However, I am infuriated with your stereotypical view of a typical NDS game. In case you haven’t noticed, none of those games have been released in America, and if they have, they would probably have either a T or M rating for sexuality, something LITTLE KIDS that play with the DS like those shown in your Youtube videos will not be able to get to until during or after high school. And why are you looking at JAPANESE GAMES??? That I wonder about right now. You live in the US, so you should look at games that are available in the US. Or are you attacking Japan’s products, like anime and games, because they are easier to attack due to their usually recurring sexual themes? Just deal with it non-negatively. The United States and Japan are two different countries with two very different cultures. You can’t criticize what the Japanese make or do, just because they are different from the typical American culture.

    Also, about those games, if you look at all the Nintendo DS games in this world, you will see the ‘good’ games heavily outweigh the ‘bad’ games, so I believe it is futile to attack the NDS your because they things that you attack are but a stain the no one happens to notice on my shirt.

    Anyways, thank you for listening, or actually, reading!!!!!

    Comment by WianaotBrriarNod — December 24, 2007 @ 10:14 pm | Reply

  249. Whoops, I just noticed my mistake in the thrid paragraph. When I talked about ‘He attempted to cease-and-desist Mortal Kombat”, I was talking about Thompson, not the Virginia Tech guy.

    Comment by WianaotBrriarNod — December 25, 2007 @ 2:50 am | Reply

  250. [...] @ 8:52 am Tags: Nintendo, Nintendo DS, Touch Dic, video game It’s not too late to snap that Nintendo DS in half.  I have just been made aware of another inappropriate game being marketed towards [...]

    Pingback by Christmas Alert: Touch Dic « Blogs 4 Brownback — December 25, 2007 @ 8:52 am | Reply

  251. First of all, you people disgust me. You guys are like Michael Moore. Well, at least Michael Moore uses valid points and research that is true, and for that I admire him.

    Wow, talk about mood swings. Let’s see if I understand this correctly.

    We disgust you.
    We are like Michael Moore.
    You admire Michael Moore.
    Therefore you admire us.

    Thank you!

    Comment by Psycheout — December 25, 2007 @ 9:17 am | Reply

    • “Well, at least” would be the primary part of that comment.

      Comment by The Schwarzenator — April 14, 2010 @ 6:30 pm | Reply

  252. Wow, way to make a comeback. Instead of attacking the comment itself, you decide to attack this little comment that was placed in the comment, that had nothing to do with the purpose of the article itself. This shows how weak you are, how you are unable to attack, knowing that we are right and you are wrong. And if you really thought that you were right, then you would have attacked us back with valid points.

    Also, you seem to have misinterpreted was I have…. typed. Let me restate or retype what I meant

    I hate people that are biased to the extreme, like you guys and Moore. However, I admire Michael because he has some truth to what he says and he also uses valid points. For that, I forgive Michael Moore.

    I DO NOT admire you guys because you guys, not only are you guys extremely biased, but you guys also use false facts to support your side. The original Donket Kong, or as I would like to say, Jumpman, is about a unusually sized monkey/gorilla/ape kidnapping a girl to satisfy his carnal desires? Then I guess every fairy tale that involves a princess being kidnapped by a dragon only to have a valiant knight is about the dragon using the princess for his carnal desires? I bet there are millions of those stories in the world too. I guess we’re going to have to burn them all too.

    There, now that should be easier to understand for you meager sized brain.

    I am sorry if I sound incredible rude. I have just experience a terrible loss from a business deal, and thus I am in a rage. I usually am not like this.

    Comment by WianaotBrriarNod — December 25, 2007 @ 2:10 pm | Reply

  253. Then I guess every fairy tale that involves a princess being kidnapped by a dragon only to have a valiant knight is about the dragon using the princess for his carnal desires?

    Yes, that’s usually the subtext. I’m glad you figured that out. No need to thank me. It’s Christmas and I’m feeling generous today.

    I am sorry if I sound incredible rude.

    Ah, you noticed that too?

    I have just experience a terrible loss from a business deal, and thus I am in a rage.

    Yeah, you have to be careful. Those people from Nigeria that claim that they have a lot of money to transfer into your account if only you pay a small fee are liars.

    I usually am not like this.

    Yes, demon possession will do that.

    Comment by Psycheout — December 25, 2007 @ 2:58 pm | Reply

  254. Snapping a person’s DS? You’ve got to be kidding me.

    There are unlimited ways to contact a child, if you include the DS. How about the PSP now, huh? Apparently, it can sense connections that are farther away! How about the PS3′s new game, Home? How about all those IM services us kids love to use day in and day out?

    Come on, Psycheout. Kids these days are aware of the dangers. I don’t know about your intelligence (or lack of it), but we won’t get tricked.

    In math combined with internet speak, we call this a: (noob*500)/troll(noob*500)=Psycheout

    Comment by Nospmoht Kcaj — December 27, 2007 @ 5:59 pm | Reply

  255. In math combined with internet speak, we call this a: (noob*500)/troll(noob*500)=Psycheout

    In programming you’d want to use == because = is the assignment operator, or you could reverse the terms.

    Psycheout = (noob*500)/troll(noob*500);

    Of course since noob and troll are undefined, there will be a problem compiling that.

    Psycheout = “teh awesome”;

    would compile correctly in any context.

    Better yet,

    if (Psycheout != “teh awesome”) {
    Psycheout = “teh awesome”;
    }

    Comment by Psycheout — December 27, 2007 @ 7:21 pm | Reply

  256. I wasn’t really talking about programming, was I? Then again, you need to know math to program things…

    …meh.

    You still haven’t really answered my question yet. Yes, we can “stop pedophiles” by snapping the DS in half, but what about the other ways?

    Comment by Nospmoht Kcaj — December 27, 2007 @ 7:57 pm | Reply

  257. Let’s crack down on disgusting pedophiles in every possible way, including snapping DS games in half. Let those snaps be heard across the world!

    Comment by Psycheout — December 27, 2007 @ 8:54 pm | Reply

  258. How about we do something less hysterical and maybe try to come up with a system that keeps pedophiles from acting out their fantasies on children? If they can wear out their energies on some game, I say let them.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 27, 2007 @ 10:20 pm | Reply

  259. You STILL crack me up, Psycheout.

    I think you belong in North Korea. You sure sound like one. Think of ONE communication device that doesn’t enable people COMMUNICATING to each other. But, then, of course, it wouldn’t be a communicating device, would it? Every single device of this kind HAS a risk, if you can’t or don’t understand and avoid these situations, go to someone, and say with a straight face, “I am NOT smarter than a 5-year old.”

    Comment by Nospmoht Kcaj — December 28, 2007 @ 10:12 pm | Reply

  260. …Because snapping their DS in half *won’t* make them more rebellious and more eager to run away from home. Duh! How could we have been so stupid?[/sarcasm]

    Comment by Bob — December 31, 2007 @ 11:11 am | Reply

  261. Wow…just…wow. You “mature” adults think we’re the least intelligent creatures on the face of the earth. What goes on in your head before you fall asleep? Where do you come up with this stuff? Pedophiles using a DS to kidnap children sounds like something they would do, but kids aren’t that stupid! If you want to snap your child’s DS (which stands for Developer’s System, you dumbass…) in half, you must either not love your child or are rich enough to waste that much money so your child can just…I can’t even go into explaining.
    What I don’t understand is why every form of communication is dangerous to you. Kids should know not to give personal information out. If this stuff happens, it’s usually the parents’ faults for not telling them ahead of time.
    What also worries me is the fact that you think all video games are bad. No games are bad unless they have to hide them from store shelves. I’m doing pretty well in school so far, and why is that? Because I grew up on video games. They put your mind to the test and get you used to hard work. You need to think.
    Also, your comment about demon possession really pushed me over the limit. DO NOT talk about possession unless you have EXPERIENCED IT LIKE I HAVE. It is more painful than anything you can imagine.

    Throughout this entire thing, I couldn’t help but laugh. I laugh at you, I laugh at your age group, and I laugh at this article. But I worry about the fate of the country if we’re being run by people like you. Freedom is depleting in your hands, and all because you happen to be closed-minded paranoid adults.
    I find it sad that a fifteen year old sophomore has more sense than you. I wonder how you made it this far. Good luck with the rest of your failures.

    That is all.

    Comment by Joe, I OWN A DS — January 22, 2008 @ 7:15 pm | Reply

  262. Actually Joe, it stands for Dual Screen.

    This article clearly illustrates how out of touch a large portion of the Baby Boomer political base is. While indeed there are some games I would never allow my children to play, there are many examples of games that are certainly child friendly. The problem is when people who wish to forward their own agenda’s (Such as you with this post here) attempt to pass off their own opinions as facts. Your comment on Donkey Kong clearly demonstrates this. Perhaps I should say that King Kong had the same intentions towards his hapless victim. Perhaps I should suggest that all pencil sharpeners be banned from schools, because it is CLEARLY sexually suggestive to put a pencil in a hole.

    While you are indeed entitled to your opinions, this article could easily end up as evidence of slander. I implore you to research more thoroughly next time, including research of opinions that vary from your own, perhaps then you can overcome this sensationalism that is clearly present in this piece.

    Thank you.

    Comment by Paul Masterson — February 9, 2008 @ 3:24 pm | Reply

  263. The Bible talks about whores and sodomy. Can we get that censored?

    Comment by Dio Brando — February 9, 2008 @ 3:36 pm | Reply

  264. People dont just sit with picto-chat running waiting to talk to someone. You have to join a room to talk to someone.

    Comment by Nigger Faggot — February 12, 2008 @ 2:48 pm | Reply

  265. “An interesting side note is that the game was originally going to be called “Puck Man,” but knowing how foul the youth of the day were, they changed the “Puck” to “Pac.” You see, by etching away part of the “P” in “Puck,” vandals could easily spell out a profane word. The youth of the day, as in this day, loved curse words almost as much as drugs. “Pac” is probably a reference to foul-mouthed rap artist “Tu-Pac.” (Translated it means “you pack” as in packing heat.) Pac Man is not played much today. Not enough kicks.”

    You are clearly a fool. Tupac Shakur was 9 years old when Pac-Man came out. And Tupac is his BIRTH NAME. He may have made some comments about it meaning to pack (heat) much much later. Your lies make Jesus cry!

    Comment by Paul Masterson — February 18, 2008 @ 12:53 pm | Reply

  266. An interesting side note is that the game was originally going to be called “Puck Man,” but knowing how foul the youth of the day were, they changed the “Puck” to “Pac.” You see, by etching away part of the “P” in “Puck,” vandals could easily spell out a profane word. The youth of the day, as in this day, loved curse words almost as much as drugs. “Pac” is probably a reference to foul-mouthed rap artist “Tu-Pac.” (Translated it means “you pack” as in packing heat.) Pac Man is not played much today. Not enough kicks.

    Considering you removed my previous post, I’ll be posting it again.

    Tupac Shakur was born in 1971, Pac-Man was released in 1980. That would make Tupac (His BIRTH name by the way) 9 years old at the time of Pac-Man’s release. This was long before he was a popular rapper, and before the term “packing” (To pack heat, aka carry a gun) came into use. This information is freely avaliable, and even mere moments of research would have revealed this. I find it in poor taste that you insult your readership with such false information and illogical conclusions.

    Comment by gamegendefense — February 18, 2008 @ 1:51 pm | Reply

  267. “…NES or some other newfangled video gaming gadget.”

    Between this and your response to the guy that used pseudocode, it’s obvious that you know exactly what you’re doing here. It’s actually kind of funny; you’ve taken trolling to a whole new level.

    Comment by superfluous Moniker — February 21, 2008 @ 6:15 pm | Reply

  268. wow. you people are truly insane. fuck you. there is nothing wrong with the ds.

    Comment by Sephiroth — March 5, 2008 @ 8:40 pm | Reply

  269. this is down right funny the devil screen? the pornable? you sir are one of those people you make up names for things that suck compared too i bet an N GAGE?

    Comment by Dan — March 14, 2008 @ 12:01 pm | Reply

  270. Malls have cell phone signal boosters I bet fox forgot to mention that. If you are in a car driving somewhere you won’t get more than 50 feet if nothing is in your way.

    I love how everyone thinks you are a troll. Its no wonder you don’t have a chance at the election.

    Comment by Zero — March 27, 2008 @ 3:03 pm | Reply

  271. None of these people here are actually running for President (thank God for that). This is just a site that changes allegiances every five seconds.

    Comment by Some Guy — April 11, 2008 @ 5:38 pm | Reply

  272. “you sir are one of those people you make up names for things that suck compared too i bet an N GAGE?”
    moar liek n-GAYge, am i right?

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 11, 2008 @ 7:02 pm | Reply

  273. Wow, you guys are total…well, I would swear here but that might seem ironic, so lets just say morons.
    Let me point out each flaw in the entire article.
    “Devil Screen”–What? When has this ever been called that? You probably came up with that name to make this article seem more realistic.
    “(makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires)”Okay, let’s stop here for a second–Are you indicating that in fairy tales that are read daily to little children indicate that dragons like to kidnap princesses for the same reason?
    “It’s also been a tremendous success for pedophiles everywhere.” Statistics? Proof? Sorry, don’t believe you there. NO ONE WILL. Unless they’re loyal to you and their IQ is in the 50s.
    “And get this (brace yourselves): the slogan for this evil piece of “hardware” is “Touching is good.”” Gee, this would only sound bad if you tried making it sound bad. For someone who is not trying to pervert something in every way possible, it sounds perfectly fine. Let me guess, your next article will be about the Wii’s name and how it can relate to [i]so[/] many perverted things?
    ““come to the mall and we can go shopping and do other fun stuff. Don’t tell your mom because she might spoil our fun. Parents are such a drag. LOL.”” Unfortunately, even if this were true, you forgot to mention this girl’s age. Had she been a teenager, the person communicating may have been a friend.
    “[insert video 1 here]” bull. That was a regional report just trying to find stories so that the news didn’t have to end early.
    “X(rated)-Box” Let’s stop here and count the number of E rated games I have in my library here…4. Now that may not seem like much, but it’s enough to render this null.
    “[insert video 2 here]” I stopped listening after she said “most popular electronic.” For one, that’s not even grammatically correct, and two, since when was the PSP the most popular? I can’t really support the PSP as I don’t have any Sony products. I’ll leave that to everyone else.
    “video game expert Jack Thompson” This made my heart skip a beat in shock. Since when has he been a video game expert?”
    “Grand Theft Auto, while a game industry shill tries to justify this unacceptable garbage, a carjack cop-killing hooker-loving simulator. Nice try, but no cigar.” Gee, ever wondered why it’s rated Mature? (One of them being rated Adults Only.)
    “gaming insiders refer to the chat feature as “pedochat.”” Since when? Another name you just created.
    “[Insert Pac-Man Paragraphs here]” A person with an inappropriate (no offense or anything) nickname, as well as various other people, beat me to this.
    “The problem with witches is that they look like ordinary 13 year olds, which gives Japanese men no choice but to corner and feel up every young girl they come across.” Have you seen this game in America or Canada? No. In Japan, that kind of stuff is more accepted.
    “Video Game Perversion” I looked at that article, and I stopped when I was skimming and saw “Christian toy”. What the hell? Not everyone believes in Christianity, and even if you did, why the heck would you want a TOY?
    And sorry, I’m too disgusted to read the follow up article. I’ll let someone else do that bit.

    Comment by CustomCharacter — April 28, 2008 @ 6:02 pm | Reply

  274. Do you try to stir up drama to distract people from how terribly you and your political party and beliefs are nailing them doggie style? How about you write an article about all the American intelligence that was contrary to what President Bush told the people? Or perhaps you should talk about the imminent end of the polar ice caps that can and will kill billions of people? You sicken me. QQ more.

    Comment by Outraged — May 30, 2008 @ 2:45 pm | Reply

  275. LOL! Something like 90% of this entire article is either falsified or horribly misconstrued. Get your facts STRAIGHT and stop making crap up. Its the people like you that make Christianity look bad. In fact due to the ignorance of said people I gave up Christianity. I would rather be associated with atheists. (Note: I am not atheist.) now as for the problems. from the top.

    “Devil Screen” as you put it. I have never heard such a name for the DS, and I suspect you just made it up.

    “Nintendo (makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires)” Nintendo-made games are not allowed, nor have they ever been allowed to contain such context as sex. As CustomCharacter put it, “Are you indicating that in fairy tales that are read daily to little children indicate that dragons like to kidnap princesses for the same reason” but i have an extension to that. Almost any fairy tale can be misconstrued like that. pick a fairy tale then think about it, how about snow white? young girl and a bunch of dwarves, could be construed as old men and a young girl, it could be implied that they all have sex. pick a fairy tale and think about it.

    “Touching is good.” this is the slogan because it has a touchscreen. Inly an idiot with a perverted imagination would try to twist it as you have.

    “Now I know that most good parents out there are aware of the danger of video games in general and would be loathe to have them in their homes.” video games actually have MANY MANY uses. Games can help children to learn. (LeapPad for example) They can be used to blow off steam for teenagers, thus helping to keep them OUT of trouble. Games can be used to keep the mind sharp. (BrainAge) They can be used to exercise the body. (Dance Dance Revolution, try it on heavy and tell me that its easy.) They help to build hand-eye coordination. Also, if you notice, games have ratings; and if a 7 year old kid has Grand Theft Auto or some other violent game, IT IS ENTIRELY THE FAULT OF THE PARENTS FOR NOT LOOKING AT THE RATING.

    “X(rated)-Box” an X rating would imply what is essentially pornography. The ESRB rating for this is Ao (adults only) and guess what. Not only does Microsoft(makers of XBox) refuse to license such material, but stores (aside from internet only stores) refuse to sell titles with this rating. Nuff-said.

    “Your child will thank you, eventually.” I doubt it. Unless you have turned your child into a slave, and beat them for not saying what you want them to.

    “lol im 15 and no one can stop kids seeing porn, porn is a good thing, kids are sexually curious and need to learn about these things” This is true. If they have access to the internet or a friends house, or even friends for that matter, kids will be exposed to porn, and numerous other things.

    “Apparently gaming insiders refer to the chat feature as “pedochat.” I _highly_ doubt that. Either you made it up or you heard something from a bad source.

    “Pac man” as for your comments on Pac man, it was released may of 1980, long before Tupac became famous(he was around 9 year old when it was released). Although I disagree with the pac-dots being a synonym for drugs, I cannot prove this.

    “The problem with witches is that they look like ordinary 13 year olds, which gives Japanese men no choice but to corner and feel up every young girl they come across.”
    “Have you seen this game in America or Canada? No. In Japan, that kind of stuff is more accepted.” – CustomCharacter
    Custom said enough with just that.

    Oh and as for your claims, give us statistics. No wait, don’t. Those can be falsified as well.

    Comment by ROFLcopter — June 16, 2008 @ 12:00 am | Reply

  276. Darn typos. I never catch them before I post. =\

    Comment by ROFLcopter — June 16, 2008 @ 12:02 am | Reply

  277. Vidio 1: You can send messages, nobody will receive it. You could be in an airtight box 2000 feet below sea level and you could ‘send’ it. Besides, for the molester thing, you have to be a kid and be in a public place and have Pictochat up when you could be playing a perfectly good game and you’d have to be as dumb as a brick to ‘fall into their clutches’. Sheesh, give kids some credit. They aren’t pathetically stupid like you say they are.

    Comment by Some Guy — June 19, 2008 @ 4:50 pm | Reply

  278. Okay, honestly, your fucking insane.
    First of all, I have a DS, and most of the time, there is NO ONE on Pictochat.
    Your way to paranoid, really.
    And the little thing about the innuendos, wow, just wow.
    Like, “Touching is good.”
    You are more immature then most kids when you see nasty things in shit like that.
    I am not quite sure that you understand that on the DS, you do things by, TOUCHING. That might explain the slogan.
    And about Pac man, and the thing with Tu-Pac.
    He was amazing, he really was, he was so real, and he rapped about things that really mattered. Honestly, that doesn’t have anything to do with Pac-man.
    I don’t think that playing pac-man is going to make your kids go out and do acid and extacy.
    And then, don’t even get me started on the porn thing.
    Sexuality IS good hunny, it really is.
    Are you teaching your kids to never fuck, until marriage, and then only to do it for the purpose of having kids, and ONLY doing it in the missionary position, and if they do anything else, they will go to hell, and they are terrible people?
    If so, I think YOU are the terrible person.
    When you tell your kids stuff like that, they still want to fuck, every part of their body is telling them to fuck like crazy hormonal monkeys, its in their nature, and you make them think, that because they have these feelings they are terrible people. All this does, is make your kids know even less about sex, and safe sex, and feel horrible about themselves for wanting to do it.
    Chances are, they will do it, they wont tell you, and they will have a higher chance of being a prego, or getting some sort of STD.
    I’m sorry to tell you this, but, Touching is good, Sex is good, and of coarse, ITS OKAY TO BE GAY KIDDOS.

    I feel extremely bad for your kids, I’m sorry, but I do.

    Comment by Your Mum. — June 28, 2008 @ 6:39 am | Reply

  279. OMG, I LOLed so hard… And yet… I was getting a pretty bad serious face, thinking; My goodness, some Americans really are that paranoid?!?!
    I know there’s a lot of stuff going on that makes no sense. (freedom, tolerance, biggest porn-producing country in the world, hate, racism, highest amount of murders all over the world, hogging the oil and overpricing it while there are countries that want to sell it but are completely ignored and so on and so forth….)
    But man!! If you can even make up a story about donky kong being a sexlusted monkey….
    I’m afraid you’re the biggest PERV I know!!!
    Only a true perv can make up such a story to go along with a completely innocent game!

    Comment by Mikey — July 26, 2008 @ 4:32 pm | Reply

  280. Hey, don’t knock molestation till you try it! (>^_^)> ^(^_^)^ <(^_^<)

    Comment by Mo Lester — August 5, 2008 @ 5:06 am | Reply

  281. Excuse me; I agree that predetors are a danger that need to be dealt with but please please do NOT say that a piece of information contains objective data when it obviously is not; I dont care what you say or how you say it, as long as you don’t pretend that your being objective.

    plus Grand Theft auto is only available to over 18′s. Nice Try. But No Cigar.

    unfortunatly *touch* is refering to touch screen, thats the newest form of gamin, where you touch the screen

    I don’t hate you I don’t think you’re pathetic like many people commenting do, in fact I love you as a brother; I simply think you’re view of God is twisted into victorian thinking…

    Comment by rvbfan101 — August 30, 2008 @ 5:34 pm | Reply

  282. I. Fucking. LOVE. YOU. This has got to be one of the funniest, ill-informed pieces of shit I have ever read. If this is a joke, than it is a well made one and quite possibly the best and funniest political satire I have EVER read. If you’re trying to make a valid point and people like you actually exist, than it’s even funnier. I don’t believe a form of mental retardation like this can possibly exist so I’ll assume it’s the former.

    Comment by Mike V — September 30, 2008 @ 10:02 pm | Reply

  283. [...] to your family as soon as possible. It’s an excellent satire that lampoons the devoutness of Nintendo fans and atheistic scientists towards their imbecilic doctrines. The episode is simple, but ought to be [...]

    Pingback by Hilarious South Park Episodes! « Calvinists 4 Conservatism — October 5, 2008 @ 10:14 pm | Reply

  284. It’s amazing how this is still getting replies.

    Comment by Hunter X — October 16, 2008 @ 10:30 am | Reply

  285. Are you people all mentally challeneged? Use the brain god gave you and stop listening to this piece of trash “blogger”. I also like how all your videos are from fox news. Your way of life is at and end. The world is growing smaller by the day, and your type of controlling, uneducated bullying is at an end. You all see it coming, which just makes you right and left wing nuts angrier. Well the majority of us in middle America see your lies for what they are. But as long as shitty human beings like you are trying to control people with false information, there will continue to problems. Your as bad as the muslims you hate so much.

    Comment by Dr David Smedley — October 21, 2008 @ 4:57 am | Reply

  286. Please tell me how this is worse than an internet chatroom or messageboard.

    Also, if you’re looking for a kid’s DS game, try Dr. Kawashima’s Brain Training, Cooking Mama or Super Monkey Ball.

    Comment by Anna — July 6, 2009 @ 6:07 am | Reply

  287. My favorite part, was the Fox News piece on the DS. Where the mother was so surprised her little one gave their address to the man who was IN THEIR HOUSE, and how the reporter was concerned over how easily he got answers from them after have only met them a few minutes prior… Yeah, being introduced to someone by their mom really throws up that ‘stranger’ flag for a kid.

    Comment by Malific — November 5, 2009 @ 3:24 pm | Reply

  288. the only stupid thing about such systems is that they are TOO easyto handle.Theyshould hav a unix shell, from hich the kids need to start their game. … After they managed to write the driver for the Card Device

    Comment by beij — December 2, 2009 @ 9:58 am | Reply

  289. This blog is mine! I will get this crap blog!

    Comment by Frankie Mclean — December 13, 2009 @ 1:40 am | Reply

  290. I am the blog emperor! Bow down to be! Join me! Sam Brown doesn’t care about you!

    This blog has been officially named Blogs4FrankieMclean

    Comment by Frankie Mclean — December 13, 2009 @ 3:59 pm | Reply

  291. You’re an idiot. Pictochat can only be used in about a 30 ft radius. if you can chat with someone on it, you can most likely see them too. Stop talking about shit you know nothing about. The “Touch” thing is cause the touch screen. it’s not supposed to be interpreted as a sexual innuendo, it’s to emphasize the touch screen, which is a completely new concept for personal gaming. The Nintendo DS is completely safe. Your an asshole and a moron. Quit blogging about shit you don’t even know anything about! go to hell.

    Comment by Youareadumbass — December 14, 2009 @ 9:51 am | Reply

  292. this information is great to me!! thank you guys for your awesome posts As Nick says, iA?ll re-read it again, and again …

    Comment by Usdating — January 10, 2010 @ 1:32 pm | Reply

  293. Great done and keep posted. Looking forward to reading more from you.

    Comment by Usdating — January 10, 2010 @ 2:34 pm | Reply

  294. I don’t know, whats the most strange part of this blog, but I guess it is the rumours about Pacman (drug abusing and eating allive…). You must be really really sick to have such an imagination. I think you should measure the church in the same way you measure Pacman: Dink the blood of Christ and eat his flesh is what they tell you and then they will give you the drug Methanol in the form of wine and that drug has most addicts worldwide, so whats more worse: Pacman or the church? By the way: The best way to save your children from this bad bad bad world outside would be to lock it into the basement all the day in an isolated chamber with rubber at the walls, but I guess it would be a better idea to put you in such a chamber.

    Please do not take my words seriously, as do do not take yours seriously.

    Cheers

    Angus

    Comment by Angus Mummery — January 22, 2010 @ 1:35 pm | Reply

  295. Dude. You Fail.

    Comment by Jack — March 21, 2010 @ 10:21 pm | Reply

  296. Lol,great post.It truly is a Christmas Alert for kids.I think I will buy a nintendo DS for my little brother,so thanks a lot for posting this.

    Comment by best porn photo galleries — July 14, 2011 @ 4:29 am | Reply

  297. Also that we would do without your very good idea

    P.S. What do you think about Windows 2012?

    Comment by khriconkhricon — September 10, 2012 @ 10:26 am | Reply

    • Personally I try not to. Noticed, did you not, the release sequence?

      Windows 3.1, Windows 95, WINDOS XXXp, Windows 7 (7 has special meaning in paganism, whichkraft and socialism), Windows h8

      Many buildings over 12 stories high omit the number 13 in their floor numbering scheme.

      Notice the obscured version number in the above sequence and take note of that to which it refers.

      Windows 666. Whom do you serve?

      Comment by Psycheout — November 8, 2012 @ 3:17 am | Reply

  298. LOL! What a nice comic blog! It is a comic blog, right? I can’t find another way to understand all the funny stuff posted above.
    See ya!

    Comment by LOLcat — January 16, 2013 @ 11:37 pm | Reply

  299. LOL! What a nice comic blog! It is a comic blog, right? I can’t find another way to understand all the funny stuff posted above.
    See ya!

    Comment by KFC — January 17, 2013 @ 12:57 am | Reply

  300. At this time I am going to do my breakfast, later than having my breakfast coming yet again to read more news.

    Comment by www.blairsinger.com — May 8, 2013 @ 8:43 am | Reply


RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

The Rubric Theme Blog at WordPress.com.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 37 other followers

%d bloggers like this: