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March 14, 2008

A Grim Confession

It is with heavy heart that I must confess a hidden sin.  A depravity lingers in my soul, and threatens to disbar me from Heaven forever.  It is only through fervency of prayer and steadiness of resolution that I may yet prevail in this trial, and return once again to the blessing and favor of the Lord. 

ashley-alexandra_dupre_and_friend.jpg

The harlot, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, is indeed a foul, disgusting, and loathsome wench. Her fundamental evil is manifest; she destroyed a marriage sacred to God, even if it was a marriage between leftist traitor Democrats scarcely a notch above Pagan orgying. Ashley Dupre is a deviant prostitute of French extraction. Yet, I find that I cannot stop thinking about her.

article_ashley.jpg

Her Hippie pacifism notwithstanding, this siren has caused flickerings and stirrings within me. Those powerful sensations are sinful in nature. I am well aware of this fact, yet I seem powerless to do anything about them.

I have spent the past day in pious, devoted prayer. When reading the Bible did not purge this strumpet from my mind, I began beating myself about the head and shoulders with the Holy Book, trusting in the Word of God to drive this Gallic succubus from my heart.

My wife has been very understanding of my toils and travails. I told her about the damnation I face, and we prayed together for hours. My wife pointed out that this is the exact reason why decent women strap their chest down in public, and why indecent women are fit only to be pilloried and pelted with rotten vegetables, ridiculed, scorned, and mocked by decent society. The very mangy dogs of the streets, byways, alleys and hamlets are fitter instruments of God’s beneficence than is a shameless hussy like Ashley Alexandra Dupre.

ashley_alexandra_dupre_penthouse_.jpg

Go ahead, Ashley. Suckle your fingers. Ogle me with lust in your heart and Satan in your loins. Sidle up to your equally-attractive friend in a ridiculously unwholesome outfit, alcoholic beverage in your hand and Spitzer stains on your conscience. With the help of God and my devout, pious, saintly wife, I shall destroy you. I will purge you from my soul, and I shall not rest until America sends you to Guantanamo along with the other women of impure mind and unsalvageable spirit.

God is with me, and with all Americans who resist the wiles of harlotry!

80 Comments »

  1. …lol

    nuff said

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 14, 2008 @ 8:08 pm | Reply

  2. I found that a good way to relieve myself of her temptation was to place her picture on a dartboard and watch hoards of drunks fire upon her. A woman filled full of holes lacks the ability to tempt.

    Comment by bobcorker — March 14, 2008 @ 9:20 pm | Reply

  3. Ahahaha, have fun jacking off. By the was, this incessant fawning/thinking makes you almost as impure.

    (I personally don’t find her worth of so much attention– sure, she looks good, but I’ve seen cuter)

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 14, 2008 @ 9:46 pm | Reply

  4. “A woman filled full of holes lacks the ability to tempt.”
    Well, a typical woman does a good job with the two she has…

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 14, 2008 @ 10:17 pm | Reply

  5. Are you trying to be funny? Because if you are serious, you have some SERIOUS mental issues. If you are trying to be funny, I didn’t get it, sorry.

    Comment by Mike — March 15, 2008 @ 9:48 am | Reply

  6. Sisyphus,

    I strongly urge you to go to your pastor and seek counseling over this. Only good, manly Christian brotherhood, one-on-one or in groups, will break the grip this saucy French harlot has on you.

    Comment by BJ Tabor — March 15, 2008 @ 10:58 am | Reply

  7. If it makes you feel any better, she’s not really French.

    Comment by R U Serious — March 15, 2008 @ 11:12 am | Reply

  8. Best. Blog. Ever.

    I hate sinful harlots. Personally, I think Christ does too. He is so pimp.

    Comment by AMR — March 15, 2008 @ 11:27 am | Reply

  9. What a woman wears does not excuse rude behavior in a gentleman. What goes on in the gentleman’s mind is his responsibility, not hers.

    Comment by David Hyde — March 15, 2008 @ 11:36 am | Reply

  10. “I strongly urge you to go to your pastor and seek counseling over this. Only good, manly Christian brotherhood, one-on-one or in groups, will break the grip this saucy French harlot has on you.”

    Thank you for your advice, BJ. It should please you to know that spiritual counseling has already been arranged for me.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 11:46 am | Reply

  11. “Are you trying to be funny? Because if you are serious, you have some SERIOUS mental issues. If you are trying to be funny, I didn’t get it, sorry.”

    I don’t know whom you’re addressing here. Is it possible you, too, are afflicted by demons?

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 12:01 pm | Reply

  12. “What a woman wears does not excuse rude behavior in a gentleman. What goes on in the gentleman’s mind is his responsibility, not hers.”

    Women know that their bodies contain the ultimate lures of Satan. Decent women strive to conceal these temptations as much as possible; harlots parade them about, heedless of the consequences to the immortal souls of their Christian brothers.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 12:02 pm | Reply

  13. “I hate sinful harlots. Personally, I think Christ does too. He is so pimp.”

    Amen! Although, I’m not sure I know what you mean by “pimp”.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 12:03 pm | Reply

  14. you guys cannot be serious, go to a shrink.

    Comment by dave — March 15, 2008 @ 12:29 pm | Reply

  15. “you guys cannot be serious, go to a shrink.”

    Bolshevist quacks are of no interest to me, leftard.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 12:52 pm | Reply

  16. I peed.

    Comment by It_hitted_my_head — March 15, 2008 @ 1:47 pm | Reply

    • da fuck….

      Comment by hellsbloodyrose — June 26, 2012 @ 1:09 am | Reply

  17. I prefer blondes, so I am making it through unscathed…

    Perhaps a beer, a cold shower and some time away from the computer would help.

    Comment by asimplesinner — March 15, 2008 @ 2:47 pm | Reply

  18. Wow you’re nutso

    Comment by linzworld — March 15, 2008 @ 3:02 pm | Reply

  19. You’re weird man

    Comment by spiritussancti87 — March 15, 2008 @ 3:15 pm | Reply

  20. I will pray for you Sisyphus. This whoring Jezebel should be whipped in public for what she’s put you through.

    Comment by Marcia P. — March 15, 2008 @ 4:39 pm | Reply

  21. I find it funny that Sisyphus needs to post replies to his own threads just to make it look like people are commenting. What a failure of a troll.

    Comment by Anonymous — March 15, 2008 @ 5:09 pm | Reply

  22. “Perhaps a beer, a cold shower and some time away from the computer would help.”

    The Bible is the only cure for my ailments.

    “I find it funny that Sisyphus needs to post replies to his own threads just to make it look like people are commenting. What a failure of a troll.”

    I don’t know what you’re talking about. Some moonbat cesspool called Fark picked this thread up, and it’s gotten several hundred hits. Apparently, there are more Helioleftists out there than a healthy Internet should permit. Or, who knows? Perhaps one or two of them are even Christian.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 5:30 pm | Reply

  23. It’s OK, the world is oversexualizing itself and everyone thinks it’s just peachy. I am just suprised you weren’t mocked more for not saying “Wow, I’d hit that!”, or something equally retarded.

    Comment by Where's Waldo? — March 15, 2008 @ 5:34 pm | Reply

  24. […] A Grim Confession It is with heavy heart that I must confess a hidden sin.  A depravity lingers in my soul, and threatens to disbar me […] […]

    Pingback by Top Posts « WordPress.com — March 15, 2008 @ 5:59 pm | Reply

  25. “I strongly urge you to go to your pastor and seek counseling over this. Only good, manly Christian brotherhood, one-on-one or in groups, will break the grip this saucy French harlot has on you.”
    Manly, sweaty Christian brotherhood, with bulging pectorals. Maybe Ted Haggard can help.

    Dude, first, your expression of faith in your bible is admirable, but I would suggest that you actually read it. Not peruse to your worn out underlined/highlighted passages and only read them and ignore the rest. One place you might start is the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 7, verse 1. “Judge not, lest you be judged.”

    In other words, take care of your own issues. Ms. Dupre has her own issues. You don’t know what has happened in her life, you don’t know how she got to her position. You just instantaneously judge her and on top of that blame her for YOUR problems. Pretty classy there, skippy.
    Continue on with the book of Matthew Chapter 7 “And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.”

    Christ didn’t judge or condemn prostitutes. He ministered to them.

    Luke adds to this “Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:”

    Leave the poor girl alone. It’s her business. You don’t need to post her picture in your blog and demonstrate your righteousness by mocking her when she can’t defend herself.

    If you go back and read your bible, then post passages showing everyone how Jesus was the master of righteous ridicule, how he pilloried people who didn’t live up to proper standards of behavior, how he mocked the lame, stoned the prostitutes, and bragged about his purity, then I will start to think your blog entry is “Christian”. As it is, despite your claims, this entry is quite far from the Christianity that Christ preached.

    Comment by Bible Reader — March 15, 2008 @ 6:58 pm | Reply

  26. Why is it anyone’s business who she is? Let’s focus on the scheming mayor.

    Comment by K'Yala Machele — March 15, 2008 @ 7:07 pm | Reply

  27. Woo! She is indeed hot! But I’ve got to say that if you persist in thinking that “their bodies contain the ultimate lures of Satan” you’re not only moronic but insulting God. Satan cannot have created women according to Christian beliefs, and why would God create something so “sinful”? If your marriage isn’t strong enough to stand-up to a hot chick that’s your fault not hers. I suggest that more sex with your wife might take your mind off of all the oh-so-hot women in this world. Also maybe accepting that you’re attracted to her, but not interested in her as a person; or are you unable to separate lust from love? If you truly love your wife then you should have faith that a minor lust for another women won’t destroy your marriage, accepting it and continuing to love your wife will indeed strengthen your marriage. Of course what would I know? I’m just a filthy pagan leftist who obviously has designs on your immortal soul…

    Hope God judges you as harshly as you deserve!

    Comment by Farker — March 15, 2008 @ 8:36 pm | Reply

  28. You sound like you’re obsessing over this chick far more than Spitzer ever did. I think it’s hilarious that you have to pray to your invisible man in the sky in order to resist Ashley’s vile temptations when millions of men in this country don’t give her a second thought without any outside help.

    So go ahead and continue fobbing off the responsibility for your unhealthy obsession onto Satan, the invisible sky man’s naughty alter-ego, instead of taking responsibility for it yourself. After all, lack of responsibility is what allows you and your little uber-Christian circle jerk to get away with all sorts of other shit without feeling guilty.

    Comment by Craig — March 15, 2008 @ 9:09 pm | Reply

  29. “Why is it anyone’s business who she is? Let’s focus on the scheming mayor.”

    Mayor?

    “Of course what would I know? I’m just a filthy pagan leftist who obviously has designs on your immortal soul…”

    Exactly!

    “Hope God judges you as harshly as you deserve!”

    God is with me. I heed His Word.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 9:11 pm | Reply

  30. “You sound like you’re obsessing over this chick far more than Spitzer ever did. I think it’s hilarious that you have to pray to your invisible man in the sky in order to resist Ashley’s vile temptations when millions of men in this country don’t give her a second thought without any outside help.”

    So you masturbate! He admits it! Shameless, sir!

    “So go ahead and continue fobbing off the responsibility for your unhealthy obsession onto Satan, the invisible sky man’s naughty alter-ego, instead of taking responsibility for it yourself. After all, lack of responsibility is what allows you and your little uber-Christian circle jerk to get away with all sorts of other shit without feeling guilty.”

    Why are you so obsessed with abusing yourself? By the way, you may not have heard the news. GOD LIVES, and JESUS IS RISEN!!!

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 15, 2008 @ 9:28 pm | Reply

  31. Thanks christianity for the murder of my people! Truely a wonderful religion. Jesus is a joke and god is invisible because he does not exist.

    Comment by Native American — March 15, 2008 @ 9:50 pm | Reply

  32. So you masturbate! He admits it! Shameless, sir!

    Sisy, get some glasses. You so badly misread what you quoted.

    GOD LIVES, and JESUS IS RISEN!!!

    Romans killed Jesus, and Christians killed God. Or Weltall. I think it was Weltall.

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 15, 2008 @ 9:53 pm | Reply

  33. this is too funny. and weird. ha!

    Comment by trademark — March 15, 2008 @ 10:18 pm | Reply

  34. Shit happenends. No man or women is perfect. He who have no cast the first stone. People in high possition have being doing this types of thing forever we just don’t here about them. And when someone who you wouldn’t thought of get caught up because he believe that people will never find out. Wrong my friend, wrong, wrong, wrong,!!!

    I will not dog him or say anything bad about the former governer but only give my blessing to him and his family. You die once but fallen you can get up and be better. Like a seed that falls to the ground after germinating its roots reaching the soil which will give it food and nutrient it will grow bigger, faster, and stronger as time passes. He will recover!

    Comment by gervisb1251 — March 16, 2008 @ 12:35 am | Reply

  35. I don’t know if this joke really works. Too many people think this way; and they might take you seriously. I hope to G-d the people in these pictures are in on it, otherwise you’re opening yourself up to defamation lawsuits at the least, angry brothers and fathers at the worse.

    Oddly enough, According to Jesus even looking at a women lustfully is the same as her sleeping around with a bunch of guys (Matt 5:27-28) So since you actually believe the traditional interpretation of the Bible then you believe you’ve committed the exact same sin that she has. But no Follower of Christ would actually treat people this way, so it’s got to be a joke. Just not a funny one.

    Comment by calvinlawson — March 16, 2008 @ 2:06 am | Reply

  36. “A woman filled full of holes lacks the ability to tempt.”
    Well, a typical woman does a good job with the two she has…

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 14, 2008 @ 10:17 pm

    Only two? So what you’re saying is your girlfriend doesn’t have a mouth

    Comment by andrew — March 16, 2008 @ 5:02 am | Reply

  37. Fine. I am now fully convinced this blog is a parody. Yes I am.

    Comment by dandus — March 16, 2008 @ 5:49 am | Reply

  38. […] 16, 2008 in Uncategorized This probably isn’t supposed to be nearly as hilarious as I find it.  I strongly recommend […]

    Pingback by A Grim Confession? « Starcrossed — March 16, 2008 @ 6:58 am | Reply

  39. ….And the Lord said to the sinner, “Go ye forth and pork that slut. Pork her until the sacred cows come home. Pork her until the lightning strikes and smites her. Pork her whilst singing the praises of your eternal God. Now GO!”
    And, he did go forth and pork her. He porked her as God commanded him to. And he did it well.

    Comment by emptyhandkiller — March 16, 2008 @ 7:30 am | Reply

  40. Like I told my husband before we got married, it’s ok to look and appreciate a nice looking woman for taking care of herself, but if I ever caught him playing tug of war with his Cyclops I would superglue it to his belly when he was sleeping. Maybe somebody needs to buy your wife a tube of superglue and sit it on your nightstand as a reminder of how disrespectful that is to her. We’ve been married for 19 years now and he has never been unfaithful to me with another woman or his hand. I’m just saying.

    Comment by Connie Mack — March 16, 2008 @ 8:50 am | Reply

  41. “Only two? So what you’re saying is your girlfriend doesn’t have a mouth”
    Unless…IT’S A TRAP!
    lol jk, forgot about the mouth.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 16, 2008 @ 10:49 am | Reply

  42. I can’t believe these whores, they are a disgrace to humanity tempting unsuspecting men with their suggestive behavior, and scandalous dress. I believe they should be sent to prison for the rest of their worthless STD filled lives. Any self respecting woman would be respectful of the temptations a man must face every day and would keep her self covered from head to toe.

    Comment by Anders — March 16, 2008 @ 10:55 am | Reply

  43. ” . . . decent women strap their chest down in public, and why indecent women are fit only to be pilloried and pelted with rotten vegetables, ridiculed, scorned, and mocked . . .”

    Have you heard the word of Allah?

    Comment by KDC — March 16, 2008 @ 11:01 am | Reply

  44. I would take the black chick in the pictures

    Comment by the_invisible_boot — March 16, 2008 @ 11:07 am | Reply

  45. adfaf

    Comment by blurryblue — March 16, 2008 @ 2:21 pm | Reply

  46. EB, that not-so-subtle anime reference was brilliant. 😀 Traps are epic. (bet the OP doesn’t even know what that means… LULZ)

    Comment by CJ Blackwing — March 16, 2008 @ 5:16 pm | Reply

  47. Funny how you addressed my joke and not my point. Let me re-iterate it for you. SLEEP WITH YOUR WIFE MORE! She’ll thank you, and God will be glad to get some time off from your incessant whining about how you’ve been tempted by another woman.

    Comment by Farker — March 16, 2008 @ 5:34 pm | Reply

  48. I too was tempted by this harlot also. The temptation was more than I could bear and I faltered. It was only through the intercession of my Pastor that her cold grip on my heart was released.

    Yes, when Pastor Jones’s rock solid cock plunged into my anus and tore my rectum, I was reminded that only the intimate brotherhood of a holy man could return my thoughts to Jesus.

    Oh… Jesus… His rock hard abs… JESUS HAS COME!

    Comment by ChristsOwn — March 16, 2008 @ 6:37 pm | Reply

  49. That scarlet-letter strumpet led a powerful man into the sin of he-ing and she-ing. It looks like she’s about to commit the even more heinous sin of she-ing and she-ing with a Negress no less!

    Sisyphus, you need to get down on your knees before your Godly Pastor in the spirit of Christian contrition to avoid the even more terrible fault of me-ing and me-ing.

    Comment by Dan Gambiera — March 17, 2008 @ 2:00 am | Reply

  50. OK. First of all let me start with this. “Let he who is without sin cast stones.”

    I’m sure that you’ve sinned in your life. Everyone has. And if you claim you haven’t, well then you’re a liar.

    She’s a hooker. Ever been to New York? Chicago? LA? Any urban area? Guess what: They’re everywhere and they will always “tempt” but realize that they are not always into it. a lot of them do it simply to survive and if you are too god-obsessed to admit that that is reasonable and say they should have starved or something then you sir are retarded.

    It’s people like you that make me ashamed to be republican. Put the bible down, son. It ‘ll only make you look retarded.

    Comment by Athiest — March 17, 2008 @ 6:50 am | Reply

  51. It’s obvious that you are not taking your cold showers cold enough.

    This, notwithstanding, your message is well-taken and it posed me a moral dilemma that I would like you to address, good sir.

    You write, “My wife pointed out that this is the exact reason why decent women strap their chest down in public . . . . ” But, does this apply equally to us who were given only A or B cups by the GOOD LORD? Would our stuffing them with inserts or tissues, or even wearing unneeded garments out of vanity be pleasing in the eyes of the LORD? Is that equivalent to spurning that which the LORD has granted us? Should I continue to keep Victoria’s Secret, or would the simple expedient of Band-Aids be sufficiently Godly for the thoughtful and sincere Christian woman who does not have Bulgarian airbags? Please advise. It’s obvious that you and your good wife have given some thought to these matters.

    Comment by Angélique Breaux — March 17, 2008 @ 8:25 am | Reply

  52. You would have made a better argument if you had spelled atheist correctly.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 17, 2008 @ 8:27 am | Reply

  53. To be honest, it is difficult to determine if this is real or satire. If it is real, you may message me at my home e-mail. I don’t claim particular expertise in this area, but perhaps I can help point you to those who can.

    Comment by Joe — March 17, 2008 @ 9:27 am | Reply

  54. Connie Mack, I feel very sorry for your husband.

    Comment by calvinlawson — March 17, 2008 @ 12:14 pm | Reply

  55. “Should I continue to keep Victoria’s Secret, or would the simple expedient of Band-Aids be sufficiently Godly for the thoughtful and sincere Christian woman who does not have Bulgarian airbags”

    You slutty whore! The thought of your dirty milkjugs covered only by bandaids makes me sick! Go wrap yourself in burlap you harlot!

    I will now go to church in my new Hummer..

    Comment by Marty McPain — March 17, 2008 @ 12:45 pm | Reply

  56. “’Should I continue to keep Victoria’s Secret, or would the simple expedient of Band-Aids be sufficiently Godly for the thoughtful and sincere Christian woman who does not have Bulgarian airbags’

    You slutty whore! The thought of your dirty milkjugs covered only by bandaids makes me sick! Go wrap yourself in burlap you harlot!

    I will now go to church in my new Hummer..”

    Please be kind to our errant well-meaning Christian sister, and recommend that she wear a tinfoil bustier under her blouse of modest cut and suitably opaque material. This would prevent any such unappetizing thoughts from emerging.

    And both she and you should increase your tempo of prayer while on your knees.

    Comment by Philomena J. Cottamaploss — March 17, 2008 @ 12:56 pm | Reply

  57. “I can’t believe these whores, they are a disgrace to humanity tempting unsuspecting men with their suggestive behavior, and scandalous dress. I believe they should be sent to prison for the rest of their worthless STD filled lives. Any self respecting woman would be respectful of the temptations a man must face every day and would keep her self covered from head to toe.”

    Amen!

    “Funny how you addressed my joke and not my point. Let me re-iterate it for you. SLEEP WITH YOUR WIFE MORE! She’ll thank you, and God will be glad to get some time off from your incessant whining about how you’ve been tempted by another woman.”

    A gentleman does not discuss such things.

    “Oh… Jesus… His rock hard abs… JESUS HAS COME!”

    I will pray for you.

    “Sisyphus, you need to get down on your knees before your Godly Pastor in the spirit of Christian contrition to avoid the even more terrible fault of me-ing and me-ing.”

    Will do, friend. Thanks for the advice!

    “OK. First of all let me start with this. “Let he who is without sin cast stones.”

    My good friend, TD Gaines-Crockett, has already offered to cast the first stone for me. My sin in lusting after Miss Dupre is thereby expiated in her pious saintliness.

    “I’m sure that you’ve sinned in your life. Everyone has. And if you claim you haven’t, well then you’re a liar.”

    Yes, but some sin more than others. My lust is less egregious than harlotry. Or treason. Or Copernicanism.

    “She’s a hooker. Ever been to New York? Chicago? LA? Any urban area? Guess what: They’re everywhere and they will always “tempt” but realize that they are not always into it. a lot of them do it simply to survive and if you are too god-obsessed to admit that that is reasonable and say they should have starved or something then you sir are retarded.”

    God would have seen to their needs, had they not strayed from His flock.

    “It’s obvious that you are not taking your cold showers cold enough.”

    If the Lord wanted our showers to be colder, He would’ve invented them so that ice cubes fell out.

    “Connie Mack, I feel very sorry for your husband.”

    At least his wife is a true Christian and a fine American.

    Comment by Sisyphus — March 17, 2008 @ 5:38 pm | Reply

  58. My lust is less egregious than harlotry. Or treason. Or Copernicanism.

    So it’s less a sin to actively seek whores, than it is to be one(whether by choice or fate)? What if we wake up in Bob Corker’s world, where women are slaves to men? If a man whores out his wife, is that not a sin? Also, you DO commit treason, by calling for the overthrow of the government and working to install a monarchy.

    Oh, and since the Pope and the Catholic Church consider the Earth to revolve around the Sun, you just called every Catholic a sinner. Have fun in hell, sinner.

    I will now go to church in my new Hummer..

    …meanwhile, Marty breaks numerous deadly sins: Greed, Lust, Gluttony, Pride.

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 17, 2008 @ 8:26 pm | Reply

  59. “Greed, Lust, Gluttony, Pride.”

    Look you fat horney freak, don’t be pushing your sins on me! I am only following God’s plan for me, and unlike you with your hell-bound ways, God Loves ME!

    and He only wants good things for me so there.

    Comment by Marty McPain — March 17, 2008 @ 8:51 pm | Reply

  60. Look you fat horney freak, don’t be pushing your sins on me! I am only following God’s plan for me, and unlike you with your hell-bound ways, God Loves ME!

    Hahaha, I’m not fat. Also, it’s spelled “horny”. I’ve had 5 shots of Bushmills and a quart of beer, and I can still spell quite well. HA.

    You don’t refute my claim that you commit four of the Seven Deadly Sins, so you obviously admit to it. And taking it like a child, I see.

    You’re following the devil’s plan by breaking those sins, admit it! The devil tempts with gilded gifts, any coincidence in the most prominent Hummer being an almost-golden yellow?
    (of course, I believe in synchronicity, not coincidence. I take views similar to Jung.)

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 17, 2008 @ 10:09 pm | Reply

  61. I’m not a freak, especially against in-the-closet wife/childbeating egomaniacs like yourself, McPain.

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 17, 2008 @ 10:10 pm | Reply

  62. Dear Sisyphus, I am ashamed for and of those who have brought disgrace to this very personal and heartfelt testament of your faith. Obviously, those with a sick and twisted Liberal agenda would seek only to undermine your struggles and tempt you into further sin. I expect no more from them. Know that Daniel and I are praying that the Lord in His infinite Grace will grant you the strength to work through this troubling time with your lovely wife and your pastor.

    Brother Marty, Might I offer you a sincere congratulation on your latest acquisition. I know from experience that every real man likes a Hummer and you, my dear, have earned it through your works of faith and devotion. May it bring you much joy.

    Dio Brando, I am shocked by your crude and loathsome accusations towards Brother Marty. I thought so much better of you than this. Don’t you feel an apology is order, dear? Please do not lower yourself to the level of the hoodlums who lurk here.

    And you, Calvin Lawson, what a perfectly wretched thing to say about Connie Mack. She is a close, personal friend and a devoted wife and mother. How dare you speak ill of such a fine and just woman. You sir, have made yourself look like a horses behind with that remark. I hope you are happy with yourself, you heathen!

    Comment by Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett — March 18, 2008 @ 1:03 pm | Reply

  63. Umm, Marty’s admitted to beating his wife and children before. Also, he didn’t refute my statement about breaking four of the Seven Deadly Sins.

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 18, 2008 @ 2:08 pm | Reply

  64. “I know from experience that every real man likes a Hummer”
    So every real man has a two-inch penis?

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 18, 2008 @ 2:34 pm | Reply

  65. Thanks TD and Sisyphus, for the compliments. I really don’t need anyone’s approval other than Chuck’s, which, for the record, I get at least three times a week after being married over 20 years. Not that it is anyone’s business here, especially that ugly Calvin Lawson. Who, from the looks of him, probably hasn’t seen a woman in his life that didn’t come with a tube for inflating.

    Comment by Connie Mack — March 18, 2008 @ 3:47 pm | Reply

  66. Is it approval with a closed fist? If not, your husband is a failed Christian.

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 18, 2008 @ 6:30 pm | Reply

  67. “Umm, Marty’s admitted to following the instructions of the Bible. Also, he didn’t bother to defend himself from my lies about breaking four of the Seven Deadly Sins.” Comment by Dio Brando — March 18, 2008 @ 2:08 pm

    there dummy… fixed your typos.

    Comment by Marty McPain — March 18, 2008 @ 7:17 pm | Reply

  68. “There, honest man, I have fixed your typos. I suck copious amounts of horse wingwong in my spare time”
    There, Marty, I fixed yours.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 18, 2008 @ 7:25 pm | Reply

  69. All you lefty homos hate this country so much, get the f-ck out! And take that skanky whore with you!!!

    Comment by N Alznaur — March 18, 2008 @ 7:29 pm | Reply

  70. there dummy… fixed your typos.

    AHAHAHAHA, you still can’t defend yourself. You sir, break SIX of the Seven Deadly Sins.

    All you lefty homos hate this country so much, get the f-ck out!

    Only after all you “homosexual pedophile right-wingers” GTFO.

    And take that skanky whore with you!!!

    UR MOM, lolz?

    Comment by Dio Brando — March 18, 2008 @ 9:53 pm | Reply

  71. […] -Sisyphus got caught jerking off to Elliot Spitzer’s current bitch […]

    Pingback by A quick rundown on our enemies current status « Blogs NOT 4 Brownback — March 26, 2008 @ 7:46 pm | Reply

  72. Wow, Sisyphus is going through puberty! Congratulations! 😀

    Comment by L — March 31, 2008 @ 8:37 am | Reply

  73. Also, how is that lovely black woman “indecently clad?” Her outfit covers her up nicely. However, I have noticed that those with lust in their hearts tend to ogle modestly-clad women even more than the strumpets who forget that a brassiere is not a shirt. Something about how “sexy” it is when a woman’s body is left up to the imagination.

    It would explain why on days when I look and feel like crap, wearing a loose-fitting T-shirt and old jeans, people always hit on me. It drives me crazy.

    Comment by L — March 31, 2008 @ 8:51 am | Reply

  74. “Something about how “sexy” it is when a woman’s body is left up to the imagination.”
    Agreed, a lovely lady in a pretty dress is quite appealing. The women you see in most rap videos are a serious turn-off.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — March 31, 2008 @ 1:07 pm | Reply

  75. Dear EB,

    Now you’re on the right track!

    Comment by Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett — March 31, 2008 @ 1:31 pm | Reply

  76. Well, yeah. Plus, since the girl in the modest outfit isn’t parading her “assets” around, guys know she’s not easy. Which means they get the challenge that men so often crave.

    Comment by L — April 10, 2008 @ 7:40 am | Reply

  77. Sisyphus – WTF? Get a clue. Get a life. Love your wife and stop obsessing over a prostitute. Perhaps this Spitzer/Ashley story has hit too close to home for you eh???? Clearly YOU are the original sinner. Stand up and take it like a man you self-centered whimpering fool. Blame all your problems on Ashley Dupre – as your problems couldn’t possibly be caused by YOU. Fool.

    Comment by packaderm — May 13, 2008 @ 1:56 pm | Reply

  78. You should go to your pastor and get some good butt fucking from him…That will relieve you of your sinful thoughts!!!

    Comment by YoLanda — August 15, 2008 @ 1:49 pm | Reply

  79. My best advise is to try some new positions with your wife and do it daily so that SHE’LL be the one on your mind.

    Comment by hellsbloodyrose — June 26, 2012 @ 1:15 am | Reply


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