Blogs 4 Brownback

April 16, 2008

B4B Exclusive: I Agree with B. Hussein Obama

Filed under: Debate,Democratic Idiocy — Tyler Dresden @ 10:51 pm

Gun CrazyIn tonight’s Democrat debate, Barry Obama said that the mentally deranged should not have guns. I agree. DemocRATs should not be allowed to own guns. Political affiliation should be required on the form when buying a gun, even a cap gun. If you’re a Republican, you get extra ammo for free. Fair’s fair.

I realize that this may not be popular, but Barry Islamobama (credit due to Psycheout) is right. Don’t let it be said that Blogs 4 Brownback is not fair. When a LIEberal DemocRAT is right, on that very rare occasion, B4B gives him props. So good for you, you gay homo crackhead muslim elitist snob, you got one right.

And it also became clear tonight that Shrillary is the anti-Mary, since she can’t possibly be the anti-Christ, not without a transgender operation, which would be a sin against God. Come to think of it, [s]he may already have had one. Discuss, if you dare.

Update: Hitlery just affirmed her support of affirmative inaction. If she really did, she’d have conceded to the gay negro voodoo priest, Barry Hussein Osama, weeks ago. Is she a liar or what?

Update 2: Doesn’t Shrillary look like a lesbian dyke tonight? No wonder she killed Vince Foster. He probably witnessed one of her many gay lesbian orgy blood sex rituals. Remember Elizabeth Bathory?

Update 3: Hitlery (aka She-Ra-Mamon-Lesbos) praised Reagan and Bush tonight. Who in the world is she trying to fool? She probably hired John Hinckley, Jr who was trying to impress Jodie Foster who played a whore in Taxi Driver. Hitlery is a gay lesbian whore who bathes in virgin blood to look young (too bad it doesn’t work). Coincidence? I think not.

Update 4: Obama said “bottom up.” Is he gay? Probably. Discuss your theories here.

td

40 Comments »

  1. A “lesbian” dyke! My god, could alternatives to such things exist?
    You should really avoid stream of consciousness writing, Tyler. Whatever pops into your head makes you out to be even more of an idiot than anyone else on this blighted site, with the possible exception of Diablo.

    Comment by Armand Jean du Plessis de Richelieu — April 16, 2008 @ 11:08 pm | Reply

  2. gay negro voodoo priest

    Hey guys, guess which ethnicity Tyler lurrrrrvs to lynch!

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 16, 2008 @ 11:59 pm | Reply

  3. Dio, in Tyler’s defense (which he doesn’t really need), has B. Hussein Osama ever denied:

    1. being gay
    2. being dark skinned
    3. being a voodoo priest

    and

    4. being a crackhead

    Answer please. Don’t wait for the translation or the talking points.

    Comment by Psycheout — April 17, 2008 @ 12:22 am | Reply

  4. 1. being gay
    2. being dark skinned
    3. being a voodoo priest
    4. being a crackhead

    1.) Question’s never come up, though he IS married.
    2.) He’s admitted to being black. What a crime, right? Yes, Psycheout and Tyler, you’re right– the black man needs to die. But too bad I’d have to shoot you in the kneecaps if either of you began to act out your genocidal fantasies.
    3.) He’s Christian, so he’s not a voodoo priest.
    4.) He admitted to doing drugs. YEARS AGO. Hey, guess what candy Bush used to snort up his nose?

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 17, 2008 @ 1:47 am | Reply

  5. Nazi’s like you should have neither guns nor websites.

    Comment by MoxoM — April 17, 2008 @ 3:33 am | Reply

  6. I do agree that while everyone else has a right to bear arms, those with mental illnesses should not be trusted with them. This is why there are licenses for firearms–to keep guns out of the hands of those who cannot be trusted to use them responsibly.

    Also, Elizabeth Bathory never actually engaged in sex with her victims, although she was recorded to have tortured them by sticking a red-hot poker where it hurts the most.

    Also, “bottoms up” is a popular toast that has nothing to do with homosexuality.

    Comment by L — April 17, 2008 @ 9:38 am | Reply

  7. Dio @ Hey, guess what candy Bush used to snort up his nose?

    That was a youthful indiscretion. Show me were Obama has repented of it like Bush did. I’ll bet he brushed off that the same way he brushed off being friends with Weathermen Terrorists.

    Comment by BJ Tabor — April 17, 2008 @ 10:01 am | Reply

  8. “That was a youthful indiscretion. Show me were Obama has repented of it like Bush did.”
    So when Republicans do drugs, it’s just a mistake. When Democrats do it, it makes them career criminals? Besides, Obama doesn’t do drugs anymore, he’s stated as such.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 17, 2008 @ 10:22 am | Reply

  9. “I agree. DemocRATs should not be allowed to own guns.”

    Actually, I’m sure a Retardican like you should not be allowed to bear arms of any kind, even if it’s just a watergun.

    Comment by dandus — April 17, 2008 @ 11:13 am | Reply

  10. What’s a “Retardican?”

    Comment by Psycheout — April 17, 2008 @ 11:52 am | Reply

  11. A Republican, duh.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 17, 2008 @ 11:56 am | Reply

  12. This blog real or just satire? Are the authors really this dumb or just making fun of conservatives?

    Nominated for Best Conservative Blog!? I have little respect for conservatives but if this blog is among the best we need to start not allowing conservatives to own guns.

    You really need to learn the correct spelling of the candidate’s names or are you really going for that all in the rage these days ignorant look?

    Comment by MJ "revoltingpawn" — April 17, 2008 @ 12:05 pm | Reply

  13. One guy nominated it (probably psycheout).
    The blog is obviously satire; people this stupid don’t make it this far in life without walking into rush hour traffic.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 17, 2008 @ 12:34 pm | Reply

  14. EB, if it is “satire” as you claim, then why do you comment? Are your attempting to change the “satire” on this website to fit your political world view? That sounds a little crazy to me… If this site were satire, your repeated comments on it would make as much sense as writing comments onto the margins of a MAD magazine. No wonder you spurn the love and the leadership of his Most Honorable Senator Brownback.

    Comment by Diablo — April 17, 2008 @ 1:06 pm | Reply

  15. What’s a “Retardican?”

    Comment by PsyKKKeout

    YOU are the King of Retardicans, PsyKKKeout.

    Comment by MoxoM — April 17, 2008 @ 1:26 pm | Reply

  16. “EB, if it is “satire” as you claim, then why do you comment?”
    I’m playing the devil’s advocate. Besides, it’s fun to see real people falling for it.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 17, 2008 @ 2:37 pm | Reply

  17. Were you perhaps referring to a “dike” as in the underground geological feature? Since the majority of those are not lesbian, or in fact possessing of gender, awareness, or sexuality, then it might make sense to specify what kind it were. However, why say “Lesbian dyke” if you truly are referring to those females who God decided would be attracted to other women? Why repeat yourself so much? This is why stream of consciousness writing does not favor you, boy. Yes, I will nitpick something to death because I can.
    Side point, was it Corker who spilled a puddle of little Corkers, or Tabor who left a stain of little Tabors, or McPain Who salvaged society by killing a large quantity of his possible offspring over the thought of two women who would probably kill him on sight making love to each other?
    On another side note, couldn’t Clinton’s normal appearance be accredited as being rather “dykey”?
    Jon Stewart was right in zooming in on her and saying, “That look is where erections go to die.”

    Comment by Armand Jean du Plessis de Richelieu — April 17, 2008 @ 3:02 pm | Reply

  18. That was a youthful indiscretion. Show me were Obama has repented of it like Bush did.

    He wrote what, an entire chapter in a book about it? Even if it were only a sentence, that’s more than Bush– who tried to cover his up.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 17, 2008 @ 7:46 pm | Reply

  19. Dio “He wrote what, an entire chapter in a book about it? Even if it were only a sentence, that’s more than Bush– who tried to cover his up.”

    Why should Bush talk about it? Jesus forgave Bush and washed Bush’s sins away. The power of God means it never happened, end of story.

    Comment by BJ Tabor — April 18, 2008 @ 4:56 pm | Reply

  20. Why should Bush talk about it? Jesus forgave Bush and washed Bush’s sins away. The power of God means it never happened, end of story.

    Then the same should apply to Obama.

    Or are you trying to suggest that Jesus only forgives whites?

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 18, 2008 @ 6:40 pm | Reply

  21. “Jesus forgave Bush and washed Bush’s sins away. The power of God means it never happened, end of story.”
    But whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin.
    Also, got any proof that Jesus ‘washed away’ Bush’s drug use?

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 18, 2008 @ 10:49 pm | Reply

  22. Beware, Tyler. I fear that Hitlery is only the public representative of the Anti-Christ’s legions; she’s too stupid to possibly convert anyone to Satanism. However, Vegobama is certainly correct, for once, but he fails to tell the whole truth: the mentally deranged should be shot. God has punished them for a reason, and I see no reason to let them live if God is punishing them.

    Comment by bobcorker — April 19, 2008 @ 2:50 pm | Reply

  23. the mentally deranged should be shot. God has punished them for a reason, and I see no reason to let them live if God is punishing them.

    Can we start with you? ’cause only a mentally deranged moron could believe that toasters run on angels(so why doesn’t my toaster work when not plugged in? how come a satanist can use a toaster, or even an atheist?), and that coral reefs are the work of the devil(Satan didn’t exist in the earliest Abrahamic religion– were you aware?).

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 19, 2008 @ 8:47 pm | Reply

  24. I’ve just been watching a lot of videos about the 1980 presidential election. Gosh, St. Ronald said a lot of great things. If we went by what he said alone he might have made a great president. Too bad, though, about that fatal flaw: he never wore an American Flag lapel pin during any of the debates. Good thing we didn’t vote that un-American douchebag into office, right?

    God Hates Crabs!

    Comment by GodisOne — April 20, 2008 @ 1:25 am | Reply

  25. “So good for you, you gay homo crackhead muslim elitist snob, you got one right.”

    Well Tyler, I think I have to take back what I said in the “Howdy” thread (not that I was serious anyway) There is just no way you and I can have any intelligent conversations in the future, you are just too much of an idiot to carry on any serious conversations with. “Gay homo”, wouldn’t calling a gay a homo take you right back around to saying he is straight? Which Obama is.
    I’ve seen my fair share of crackheads and they are easy to spot, Obama is not one of them. Nor is he a snob.
    As for “elitist”, that’s the normal definition of a Republican, a high and mighty, better than all others rich white male who drives gas hogging suvs and calls for the elimination of all those who are different. Oh yeah, that means it’s you that’s a snob, not Obama.
    All in all, you are just as stupid as Psycheout and Sisyphus, with no talent for writing whatsoever. You do, however, have a flair for lying, just like the rest of these b4b idiots, perhaps you should just join the three fingered Corker Klan and have yourself a nice tall glass of Koolaide, we’ll be ’round to pick up the bodies later.

    Comment by Arn — April 20, 2008 @ 6:58 am | Reply

  26. Arn, you sound like a very angry bitter little man. Have you met Jesus yet? It just might change your life. Good luck, pal.

    Comment by Tyler Dresden — April 20, 2008 @ 1:08 pm | Reply

  27. Naaa, I’m not angry or bitter, but I do have a healthy dislike for stupidity in all of it’s diversified forms, most of which you can find right here on this site.😀

    Comment by Arn — April 20, 2008 @ 4:23 pm | Reply

  28. By the way, yes I did meet Jesus, I bumped into him at wal-mart the other day.

    Comment by Arn — April 20, 2008 @ 4:24 pm | Reply

  29. “God has punished them for a reason, and I see no reason to let them live if God is punishing them.”
    There used to be this guy Jesus. He was a pretty nice guy, because instead of shunning the sick, the possessed, and the poor, he embraced them. He didn’t cater to the rich; instead, he became the symbol of hope for the lowest of humanity. Ever hear of him? You might consider taking a page from that guy’s book (it’s called the Gospel).

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 20, 2008 @ 8:04 pm | Reply

  30. Apparently B4B retconned it– Jesus is now an anti-Semite hell bent on letting the world know that the conservative rich white male is the one who rules it.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 20, 2008 @ 8:11 pm | Reply

  31. “Apparently B4B retconned it– Jesus is now an anti-Semite hell bent on letting the world know that the conservative rich white male is the one who rules it.”
    And here I thought there was only one man like Joe Quesada.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 20, 2008 @ 10:06 pm | Reply

  32. “why doesn’t my toaster work when not plugged in? how come a satanist can use a toaster, or even an atheist?”

    Toasters were invented by divinely inspired guesswork. This guesswork involved managing to shepard the demons into the electric sockets, and angels into the toaster. Because a transfer system has been installed once someone plugs in a toaster, the demons and angels can then meet in the electric socket and toaster, and their fights give off energy, thus creating a toaster.

    As for the second part, angels are so willing to fight demons that they will willingly power an atheist’s toaster. It’s rather unfortunate, though. We could starve your kind quite easy if we killed off the angels’ fighting inclinations. My family prays to God over this, but He has not made significant changes. We must be patient, and stick to His plan.

    “coral reefs are the work of the devil”

    They are the work of some fanatical early-Darwinists, who were willing to work for Satan. It is not known whether it was their idea or Satan’s. However, it is easy to deduce the possibilities to this. I have never seen any person claim coral reefs were 6000 years old or less, and yet real. Magellan, Noah, and other navigators did not report seeing such objects, and Magellan lived before Darwin! Books on ‘coral’ became widespread in the early 20th century, but when I read them, they just seemed like a quick way to make a buck.

    “Satan didn’t exist in the earliest Abrahamic religion– were you aware?”

    I have no idea what this has to do with anything, but yes, I was aware. Other than his mingling with the first humans, Satan, transformed into a snake, was unable to significantly impact a human being’s life other than biting them on the ankle, or something similar. The precise time when Satan regained power is unknown. However, the fact that he influences lives is obvious. From Conservapedia:

    More liberal-leaning protestants tend to either ignore or explicitly reject the existence of demons. The Catholic Church still claims demons exist and actively try to corrupt humans into sinful behavior, but has reduced the significance of this element of doctrine.

    More conservative protestants, especially those from evangelical denominations, see demons as engaging in a constant struggle for the soul of each person. Fallen angels who followed satan in his rebellion, demons are believed to operate in secret in order to corrupt and influence individual humans in order to ensure they turn away from Christ. For some examples of this, see the works of Jack Chick.

    Comment by bobcorker — April 22, 2008 @ 3:12 pm | Reply

  33. What is this? Is Corker still not in the nuthouse? Can’t we convert him to electricity like the angels and demons and ship him off via the telephone lines?

    Comment by Arn — April 22, 2008 @ 3:21 pm | Reply

  34. “Toasters were invented by divinely inspired guesswork. This guesswork involved managing to shepard the demons into the electric sockets, and angels into the toaster. Because a transfer system has been installed once someone plugs in a toaster, the demons and angels can then meet in the electric socket and toaster, and their fights give off energy, thus creating a toaster.”
    I’d like to see proof of this.

    “see the works of Jack Chick.”
    I’ve read at least a few dozen of his little pamphlets, and the vast majority of them contain some pretty glaring contradictions and falsehoods.

    “I have never seen any person claim coral reefs were 6000 years old or less, and yet real.”
    Have you asked everyone?

    “Magellan, Noah, and other navigators did not report seeing such objects, and Magellan lived before Darwin!”
    Why would Noah see them? He was sailing over what was dry land not longer than a month ago. Reefs don’t form that quickly. And yes, I’ve read stories of sailors encountering reefs. Maybe you should try actually researching before making claims.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 22, 2008 @ 4:04 pm | Reply

  35. So why was it that the angels and demons decided to start working springs, too in the mid twentieth century? Were they really that keen that they had to make more mechanical workings for the fights to take place in?

    Comment by Armand Jean du Plessis de Richelieu — April 22, 2008 @ 6:54 pm | Reply

  36. You see, Armand, what it is here is the demons are chicken so the angels had to corner them in a tight place they coudn’t escape from (like inside wires) then squeeze in there with them to carry on their battles. My toaster quit working the other day, so I assume the angels won and now I have to find some more demons for them to fight in order to get my taoster working again.

    Comment by Arn — April 22, 2008 @ 7:11 pm | Reply

  37. Well damn. I hope you can find some replacement demons soon.
    My toaster has been working since the fifties, and the bakelite is yet to be damaged by wayward demons, so I assume that the angels are just making them their bitches now, if you’ll excuse my French.

    Comment by Armand Jean du Plessis de Richelieu — April 22, 2008 @ 7:14 pm | Reply

  38. Toasters were invented by divinely inspired guesswork. This guesswork involved managing to shepard the demons into the electric sockets, and angels into the toaster. Because a transfer system has been installed once someone plugs in a toaster, the demons and angels can then meet in the electric socket and toaster, and their fights give off energy, thus creating a toaster.

    So what about solar power? Is the Sun a giant ball of demons?

    For that matter, shouldn’t your claim mean that there is no electricity, only “demon sockets”? Doesn’t this mean you’ve covered your house with demon portals? When lightning happens, is that demons raining on you and your hovel? Is a battery a portable demon home? What about gasoline? We have to drill it from deep. Are we driving on demon blood?

    They are the work of some fanatical early-Darwinists, who were willing to work for Satan. It is not known whether it was their idea or Satan’s.

    I thought only God could create? Are you saying early-Darwinists(which makes Darwin sound much older than he is) have admin access to reality, and can make coral reefs that are already ancient?

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 22, 2008 @ 7:51 pm | Reply

  39. “For that matter, shouldn’t your claim mean that there is no electricity, only “demon sockets”? Doesn’t this mean you’ve covered your house with demon portals? When lightning happens, is that demons raining on you and your hovel? Is a battery a portable demon home? What about gasoline? We have to drill it from deep. Are we driving on demon blood?”
    Holy crap, this changes everything I know about science!

    “Are you saying early-Darwinists(which makes Darwin sound much older than he is) have admin access to reality, and can make coral reefs that are already ancient?”
    Hackers, the lot of them. Wonder if they got permabanned for it?

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 22, 2008 @ 8:37 pm | Reply

  40. EB, give up. As far as the “Religious” “Right” is concerned, if the words “Darwin,” “evolution,” or “more than 6000 years old” are mentioned, it’s Satanic and must be destroyed. I have a copy of an early-90’s publication called “The Answers Book,” by Creation “scientists” Ken Ham, Andrew Snelling, and Carl Wieland. The authors actually use scientific journals in an attempt to back up their claims–unfortunately they tend to automatically ignore or discredit absolutely everything that disagrees with their viewpoint, instead of analyzing all the data at their disposal and looking at the issues objectively. The only chapters that aren’t total junk “science” are “How could all the different races arise from Noah’s family?” and “Who Was Cain’s Wife?” both of which use solid genetic theory.

    Comment by L — April 23, 2008 @ 6:52 am | Reply


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