Blogs 4 Brownback

April 8, 2008

Meat: As American As Apple Pie

Double HomicideG-d gave Americans dominion over the Earth. That means we can do as we please and He will smile upon us. G-d also made us superior to all of his tasty little creatures which He conveniently made out of meat. Well, there is one exception, but who eats shellfish? The hamburger He made in a convenient size which fits in one’s hands. And G-d gave us those green things which serve as garnish.

But some hippies and other nutty folk have confused the garnish with the main course: beef, pork or poultry or the occasional fish or dolphin. These folk like to call themselves vegetables or vegans. They hate G-d and His most brilliant creation, human beings (especially the conservatives), and they want to force you to live their ridiculous and unsustainable lifestyle.

These folk would have us treat our dinners as equals. Imagine that! They would have us elevate the lowly animals above humans. They endow animals with human qualities (personification) by projecting their own neuroses on these unthinking, unfeeling meat containers. In fact they go much farther than that. Anything even tangentially related to animals would be banned if these loons were in charge.

American CheeseYou can’t put cheese on your hamburger because the poor cow was forced to give milk that made that yummy slice of American cheese product. But if you’ve ever been on a farm, you know without a doubt that cows look forward to giving milk. It hurts them not to. But militant vegans don’t care about that, do they? It could suffer for all they care as long as humans don’t consume cow’s milk. They don’t care about the poor cow, all they care about is themselves. Selfish to the core.

These weirdos yell and scream and throw buckets of blood at anybody who dares to wear clothing that contains fur or leather, as if going without would bring the dumb animal it came from back to life. Guess what, dummies? It won’t. And who made you the fashion police, you smelly hippies?

Some even think wearing cotton goes too far. It’s unfair to the cotton plants to deprive them of their cotton they worked so hard to produce. And if you wear petroleum based synthetic fibers they and their Code Pinko friends scream “no blood for oil!” You can’t win with these people, so why bother? They won’t be happy until everyone is naked on their commune chewing on a big wad of tofu.

Happy CowForget that. Real Americans eat meat, as G-d intended. And they eat apple pies, lots of them. Apple pie isn’t murder, and neither is steak. Pass the A-1, please. And thank Heaven for the tasty animals.

Addendum: Keep in mind that many modern animals raised for food would be unable to survive without mans’ help. So the fact that they taste good with onions benefits them as well as us. It’s win-win for all of us. Keeping animals alive for a time, protected from nasty predators, is an act of compassion, something vegans and PETA-heads know nothing about. Holy cow!

Update: Here’s how one creative scraper site excerpted this article.

Meat: As person As Apple Pie
G-d gave Americans ascendence over the Earth. That effort we crapper do as we supply and He power grinning upon us. G-d also prefabricated us fissure to every of his esthetic small creatures which He conveniently prefabricated conceive of meat. Well, there is member exception, but who eats shellfish? The meat He prefabricated in a convenient …
Read the flooded place from Blogs 4 Brownback

Perhaps something’s wrong with their algorithm?  I won’t link to it, since it’s a worthless scraper site, but is this what the Internet is going to devolve to?  I shudder at the thought.

— Psycheout

35 Comments »

  1. I’m going to guess that you’ve never actually read any vegan or vegetarian literature, only making wild assumptions on how they approach the issue of animal treatment.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 8, 2008 @ 3:37 pm | Reply

  2. “That means we can do as we please and He will smile upon us.”

    Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that.

    “G-d also made us superior to all of his tasty little creatures which He conveniently made out of meat.”

    And what do you think you are made of, Meatbag?

    “but who eats shellfish?”

    I do.

    “The hamburger He made in a convenient size which fits in one’s hands.”

    I assume you think God invented the hamburger.

    “But some hippies and other nutty folk have confused the garnish with the main course:”

    Who the hell told you that hippies were vegetarians?

    “These folk would have us treat our dinners as [equals]. Imagine that! They would have us elevate the lowly animals [above] humans.”

    So which is it, equals or above? Or are you just rattling your marbles?

    “And who made you the fashion police, you smelly hippies?”

    Once again, who the hell told you hippies were vegetarians? And please cite me just one instance where a hippy threw a bucket of blood on anyone for any reason. (in other words, you are a liar)

    “Some even think wearing cotton goes too far. It’s unfair to the cotton plants to deprive them of their cotton they worked so hard to produce.”

    While you are at it, how about some real evidence of this too.

    “Real Americans eat meat, as G-d intended. And they eat apple pies, lots of them.”

    Real Americans eat whatever the hell they want. If they want meat they can eat it, but choosing not to eat meat is a personal decision, and not one that idiots such as yourself has any right to criticise. Did it ever occur to you that most vegetarians choose their diet for health reasons and not because of animal cruelty, and that many supporters of PETA and other animal rights groups eat meat. You just have no idea who thinks what, so you just attack anyone and everyone without knowing a damn thing about what you are saying.

    And yes, I am a hippy and I eat meat. But anyone else’s choice to eat it or not is none of your damn business, not eating meat doesn’t make someone unAmerican and trying to say so just shows a bit more of your ignorance. You need to change your erroneous stereotypical views of people and try getting a few facts before spouting off with stupidity. (oh that’s right, stupid is what you do best)

    Comment by Arn — April 8, 2008 @ 4:32 pm | Reply

  3. they want to force you to live their ridiculous and unsustainable lifestyle.

    Kinda sounds just like your idea of nuking the entire planet, killing all plant life(HEY, I WONDER WHAT COWS EAT), and driving Hummers without shutting them off.

    Both are nutbag ideas, but at least one of them doesn’t end up with a dead planet so quickly.

    These weirdos yell and scream and throw buckets of blood at anybody who dares to wear clothing that contains fur or leather, as if going without would bring the dumb animal it came from back to life.

    No, but to be fair, killing an animal only for its hide, and not using the flesh or bones for something is a waste.

    P.S.: Apple pie is British/Dutch.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 8, 2008 @ 5:15 pm | Reply

  4. “These weirdos yell and scream and throw buckets of blood at anybody who dares to wear clothing that contains fur or leather,”
    Evidence or GTFO

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 8, 2008 @ 7:54 pm | Reply

  5. Seriously, as a person that lived right next to the headquarters of PETA, let me tell you, those people are crazy. There are two things you don’t see in Norfolk, any homeless (as the shipyards will hire anyone…I mean anyone) and stray animals. Peta has run local campaigns for years to get people to turn animals over to them instead of animal shelters. Guess what, PETA doesn’t believe in pets so they just gas them. They kill hundreds of animals over the years rather than tell people to send them to shelters for adoption. I’m sure everyone has seen “28 Days Later”. A similar situation happened in England except the British version of PETA effectively destroyed the local ecology because they “liberated” minks not native to England. Ignorance, no matter the calling is always dangerous. Besides, if Baby Jesus didn’t want us to eat animals, why did he make them so tasty?

    Comment by Diablo — April 8, 2008 @ 8:23 pm | Reply

  6. “These weirdos yell and scream and throw buckets of blood at anybody who dares to wear clothing that contains fur or leather,”
    Evidence or GTFO

    Actually, PETA did that once. Except it was red paint, not blood.

    PETA != honest vegetarians/vegans. PETA’s a radical bunch of eco-terrorists, almost as bad as the environment-killing douches that run this site. It’s hard to be for “ethical treatment” when you euthanize the overwheming majority of what you save.

    Besides, if Baby Jesus didn’t want us to eat animals, why did he make them so tasty?

    …because baby Jesus didn’t create animals? What, Jesus being born in 4B.C. wasn’t bad enough– now he’s older than life?

    Oh, and I dare you to try and eat one of every animal. Many of them taste like crap. Logic, yours anyways, FAILS.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 8, 2008 @ 8:51 pm | Reply

  7. \American Cheese is not food, it is food substitute. Eat some real cheese, like cheddar or something.

    Comment by Armand Jean du Plessis de Richelieu — April 8, 2008 @ 10:19 pm | Reply

  8. “…because baby Jesus didn’t create animals? What, Jesus being born in 4B.C. wasn’t bad enough– now he’s older than life?”
    According to the Bible, Jesus is God in human form, and he supposedly was an entity before coming to Earth.

    “Actually, PETA did that once. Except it was red paint, not blood.”
    The operative word there was ‘once.’ Once is an isolated incident. One point makes nothing; it takes two points to make a line, and three to make a plane. A single incident doesn’t mean anything without recurring incidents similar to it.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 8, 2008 @ 10:55 pm | Reply

  9. Seriously, as a person that lived right next to the headquarters of PETA, let me tell you, those people are crazy.

    Quoted for truth. Well said, Diablo.

    Comment by Psycheout — April 8, 2008 @ 10:58 pm | Reply

  10. PETA != honest vegetarians/vegans. PETA’s a radical bunch of eco-terrorists,

    Right on!

    almost as bad as the environment-killing douches that run this site.

    lolwut?

    Comment by Psycheout — April 8, 2008 @ 11:01 pm | Reply

  11. According to the Bible, Jesus is God in human form, and he supposedly was an entity before coming to Earth.

    Either way, it can’t be “Baby” Jesus. Or was God a baby until Jesus matured?

    The operative word there was ‘once.’ Once is an isolated incident. One point makes nothing; it takes two points to make a line, and three to make a plane. A single incident doesn’t mean anything without recurring incidents similar to it.

    Of course not. I still have issues with PETA nonetheless, since they constantly stray from what they say is their core point. They’re no Scientology, but they do share a similar fondness for lying and stalking. Sad, really. ;_;

    almost as bad as the environment-killing douches that run this site.

    lolwut?

    Nevermind the “previous entry” function suddenly missing, are you going to deny the entries about how we should purposely pollute the earth and cover it with greenhouse gases to save it?

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 9, 2008 @ 2:48 am | Reply

  12. (PsyKKKeout ate Sixsixsixyphus)

    Comment by MoxoM — April 9, 2008 @ 4:04 am | Reply

  13. It is a topic about meat.

    Comment by spacebrother — April 9, 2008 @ 5:53 am | Reply

  14. Psycheout: Yes, people are crazy.

    I believe we have every right to eat meat, in moderation. Yes, I’ll have a burger now and then (actually, lately I tend to eat burgers more than is good for me, but I top ’em with extra veggies so it’s more like a big beefy salad) but you shouldn’t eat tons of bacon all the time or you’ll lose out on the fiber and nutrients that fruits and vegetables provide. And you’ll get really, really fat to boot.

    As long as you eat the right amounts of meat (organic is best, as other meats have been injected with all matter of nasty hormones that will mess with your body unless you only eat tiny servings), balance it with other types of food, and get plenty of exercise, you’re perfectly within your rights to eat meat.

    Besides, beans may be a good alternate source of protein, but we all know the results of eating too much beans…

    Comment by L — April 9, 2008 @ 6:44 am | Reply

  15. PsyKKKeout [censored] a large amount of meat too,
    all the [censored] of his fellow B4B teammates [censored] on a daily base
    with the stars and stripes behind em
    yeeeaaaarrrgggh
    yikes

    [Admin: This may be the shortest amnesty ever. Keep it up and you’ll be back in the penalty box. I’m sorry, but your foul lyrics which seem to consist almost entirely of profanity, clever though you think they may be, will NOT appear on this blog. Clean up your language or get out.]

    Comment by MoxoM — April 9, 2008 @ 7:07 am | Reply

  16. lol

    Comment by MoxoM — April 9, 2008 @ 12:48 pm | Reply

  17. Seems that your internetgestapo not only fucks animals but also eats them after the treatment…..you really make me wanna puke.

    Comment by MoxoM — April 9, 2008 @ 1:38 pm | Reply

  18. The danger of PETA is that they prescribe to an extreme form of animal rights. I doubt anyone here is for blatant animal cruelty. That said, they are against many things that are vital to people. I was born with spina bifida which resulted in my spine not being fully closed. I basically looking at a short life in a wheel chair. Thanks to surgery pioneered on dogs and pigs, I was able to get a spinal fusion. Without animal testing, that surgery, along with hundreds of different surgeries used daily would never have been developed. PETA is also against anti-viral research, any form of genetic modification in food crops, and the owning of all pets. Its easy to take that stand when your healthy and have access to plenty of food but for the vast majority of the world, this isn’t the case. I have a real problem with PETA expecting people to just live up to their standards.

    Comment by Diablo — April 9, 2008 @ 2:24 pm | Reply

  19. “I have a real problem with PETA expecting people to just live up to their standards.”
    I still don’t get how you can condone B4B’s rampant militarism and outright hatred, but you take issue with PETA’s rampant militarism and outright hatred.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 9, 2008 @ 6:02 pm | Reply

  20. I still don’t get how you can condone B4B’s rampant militarism and outright hatred, but you take issue with PETA’s rampant militarism and outright hatred.

    He’s not black, non-christian, nor gay, so he has no problem preserving only the “master race”.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 9, 2008 @ 8:52 pm | Reply

  21. Elephant Bones and Dio, do either you two honestly believe that the credibility and exposure of B4B is on equal footing to PETA? B4B is a harmless, rather interesting blog, where as PETA kills thousands of pets, funnels money to extremists responsible for bombings, and generally misrepresents themselves to the media and the public. Honestly…who is the bigger threat in this situation?

    Comment by Diablo — April 9, 2008 @ 10:02 pm | Reply

  22. Point taken, Diablo. You win this round.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 9, 2008 @ 10:36 pm | Reply

  23. Diablo, you’ve done an excellent job of keeping this discussion interesting and on topic. I salute you for that.

    No matter how the leftards try to dodge and weave and change the subject, you just keep reminding them of the point. Well done.

    PETA is a huge organization (or organisation if you prefer) that pulls a lot of weight. B4B is a small blog, although an important one, that provokes thought and discussion and breaks through the media and secular humanist babble and propaganda to get to the truth.

    We free minds. We save souls. PETA, on the other hand, attempts to destroy them.

    I have pets. I love my pets. I take care of my pets. But PETA would have them “euthed” because having an animal friend in your home is somehow wrong. They would rather that millions of humans starve to death to save a single cow, only to send it out into the wild to be eaten ALIVE by ravenous carnivores. They would rather have tens of thousands of human beings die if it were to add a few minutes of meaningless life to a pink eyed lab rat.

    These people are crazy anti-human zealots. They deserve all the criticism they get.

    But in the future, I’d appreciate it if you would not diminish B4B’s importance and influnce. Perhaps you could just refer to B4B as “mostly harmless” and “very interesting.”

    Other than that, keep up the great work. We may have a front page poster position open, if you know what I mean. 🙂

    I think you know how to contact the B4B staff.

    Comment by Psycheout — April 9, 2008 @ 10:37 pm | Reply

  24. “These people are crazy anti-human zealots. They deserve all the criticism they get.”
    I could really aim that at any neocon that opens their mouth.

    “But in the future, I’d appreciate it if you would not diminish B4B’s importance and influence.”
    I didn’t know it could get any smaller.

    “We may have a front page poster position open”
    By all means, give him the job. He’s the only conservative poster that shows any signs of intelligence or tolerance, despite his long wall of text postings of B^U proportions. I’d like to see what he could come up with.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — April 9, 2008 @ 10:49 pm | Reply

  25. B4B is a harmless, rather interesting blog, where as PETA kills thousands of pets, funnels money to extremists responsible for bombings, and generally misrepresents themselves to the media and the public. Honestly…who is the bigger threat in this situation?

    PETA may be the bigger present threat, but the ramblings of a group dedicated to mass genocide by way of nuclear terrorism cannot be long ignored. It’s how groups like al Qaeda are formed.

    By all means, give him the job. He’s the only conservative poster that shows any signs of intelligence or tolerance, despite his long wall of text postings of B^U proportions. I’d like to see what he could come up with.

    I give him three decent entries until he either vanishes like Corker(heh, guess which other staff members have vanished as of late as well!), or drops into the bigot well and posts about killing gays, or sodomizing all liberals with a hot iron brand.

    As a note, that’s better than Corker’s “I’ll repost a single thing, and vanish”.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 9, 2008 @ 11:38 pm | Reply

  26. Well I woke up this morning
    On the wrong side of the bed
    And how I got to thinkin’
    About all the things you said
    About ordinary people
    And how they make you sick
    And if callin’ names kicks back on you
    Then I hope this does the trick

    ‘Cause I’m sick of your complainin’
    About how many bills
    And I’m sick of all your bitchin’
    ‘Bout your poodles and your pills
    And I just can’t see no humor
    About your way of life
    And I think I can do more for you
    With this here fork and knife
    Eat The Rich
    There’s only one thing that they are good for
    Eat The Rich
    Take one bite now – come back for more
    Eat The Rich
    I gotta get this off my chest
    Eat The Rich
    Take one bite now – spit out the rest

    So I called up my head shrinker
    And I told him what I’d done
    He said you best go on a diet
    Yeah, I hope you have some fun
    And a don’t go burst the bubble
    On rich folks who get rude
    ‘Cause you won’t get in no trouble
    When you eats that kinda food

    Now they’re smokin’ up their junk bonds
    And then they go get stiff
    And they’re dancin’ in the yacht club
    With Muff and uncle Biff
    But there’s one good thing that happens
    When you toss your pearls to swine
    Their attitudes may taste like shit
    But go real good with wine

    Believe in all the good things
    That money just can’t buy
    Then you won’t get no bellyache
    From eatin’ humble pie
    I believe in rags to riches
    Your inheritance won’t last
    So take your Gray poupon my friend
    And shove it up your ass

    Comment by MoxoM — April 10, 2008 @ 1:29 am | Reply

  27. “Perhaps you could just refer to B4B as “mostly harmless.””

    Sorry, but I couldn’t help grinning. In a delightful book called The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, that is the Guide entry for a planet called Earth.

    And I second EB’s nomination of Diablo. It’d be nice to have some meaningful political dialogue here instead of endless mud-slinging.

    Comment by L — April 10, 2008 @ 8:07 am | Reply

  28. Wow Dio….sadly you cannot see or hear the standing applause I am giving you for that amazing leap of logic you just made. Al Qaeda=B4B. Next you’ll be telling me that Shiite dominated Iran is supporting the Sunni dominated insurrection in Iraq. Seriously dude…some of the things you say are out there. How bout we build some camps for the people whose views you don’t like to keep them off your precious intertubes. We can always stick them in Idaho. Can I try the fun game of “Dio’s Leaping Logic” once? I find Rachel Ray’s voice really annoying….hey just like I’m sure the families of kidnapped victims of FARC in Columbia are annoyed they haven’t seen their loved ones in years… That can only mean that RACHEL RAY=Fuerzas Armadas Revolucionarias de Colombia!!! Wow, Dio, this is fun. With your logic I can attack anyone as terrorists and ignore their points of view. Are you sure you don’t work for the Bush Administration in the State Department? I find your illogical hatred of B4B even more surreal in that you have repeatedly defended 4chan/Anonymous and their right of free expression which go to show how you respect and defend people’s right of expression only as long as you previously agree with the expression in question. That my friend not only makes you a hypocrite, but a bigger threat to our constitutional freedom than any terrorist organization could.

    Comment by Diablo — April 10, 2008 @ 8:27 am | Reply

  29. Diablo, Dio’s not saying that B4B is equivalent to al-Quaeda, only that they started in the same way. Similarly, the United States and France are both democracies that got started through revolutionary wars, but that doesn’t make them the same country, nor does it imply that the two countries have the same policies. He has also pointed out that both B4B and al-Quaeda are founded on ideals of hard-line social conservatism and religious intolerance. Of course B4B =/= al-Quaeda: B4B’ers have much less influence and haven’t killed anyone yet.

    Comment by L — April 10, 2008 @ 9:24 am | Reply

  30. But L, what you are saying is remarkably dangerous to our society. So now ideas are as dangerous as criminal actions? Step back for a second and remove the entities involved for a second and just think about that for a moment. Here is a different situation…. In China, the government considers it dangerous to think of a Tibetan as different to a Han Chinese. To the government of China, the mere concept of a Tibetan identity is a criminal action. People are being arrested for simply displaying a flag. An idea in China will get you silenced. It isn’t a far jump in logic to point out that you are recommending the same thing (granted you don’t the enforcement power like the Chinese do). You know, you can always voice a differing opinion but to silence someone is such overkill. It always shocks me when my fellow Americans are willing to strip the rights of their fellow citizens away. Who is going to decide who and what to silence? You? Me? Rachel Ray?!?!?!?!

    Comment by Diablo — April 10, 2008 @ 12:45 pm | Reply

  31. As I said elsewhere: Kings have dominion over their kingdom. Does that give them the right to torment their people? For the record, I’m not a vegetarian, but for Heaven’s sake have a little respect for the living, feeling things that are keeping you alive.

    Comment by Serpentine — April 11, 2008 @ 2:06 am | Reply

  32. It always shocks me when my fellow Americans are willing to strip the rights of their fellow citizens away.

    And yet you desire a conservative, rights-restricted America. You’re contradicting yourself.

    I will defend to the death B4B’s rights to say as they wish. However, that does not exclude them from being watched. We cannot simply write off so many calls for genocide and racism, but that doesn’t mean we suddenly need to arrest Psyche or Sisy. Corker lynches, and McPain beats women to death, so uhhh, they might need to be investigated.

    Oh, and it should be noted that even though I’ve been Anon since a month after 4chan launched, I don’t always agree with things. I defend them because they have rights, as we all should. Even liberals tend to want to silence what offends them. I don’t care, so long as the point is made that there is no true desire to commit genocide. Or, in Scientology’s case, that the abuses, harassment, and murder shall cease forever on. Nothing kept secret from anyone.

    Comment by Dio Brando — April 11, 2008 @ 2:39 am | Reply

  33. (Re: the actual post, not any comments made) Ok, so now we’re not letting people choose what they want to do and what they want to eat? Sounds wrong… Oh, wait. I see. “Nominated for best Conservative blog.” Ok, now it sounds about right for the author to a) believe in “god” without a doubt, and to b) ferociously hate everything he disagrees with without logic or reason.

    Comment by Phil — May 3, 2008 @ 3:11 pm | Reply

  34. I agree milking a cow could relieve of stress if think about it but I disagree with your attitude towards vegetarians they don’t all do this to try and make others do it some simply dislike meat

    Comment by D — January 21, 2013 @ 8:52 am | Reply

  35. Okay after thinking about cows looking forward to being milked is disturbing and a sexual thing

    Comment by d — April 11, 2013 @ 5:30 pm | Reply


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