I’m sadly afraid that we’re not reaching some of you young folk. So thanks to nobody for the inspiration, here’s the B4B rap. Let me know if you’d like it on a t-shirt.
B4B is the place to be
If you’re a dirty lovin’ hippie
you’d be huggin’ a tree.
You left wing losers should just take a hike
instead of voting Hil’ry you should vote for Mike.
Sisyphus is the great grandmaster
Turnin’ you libs into arbalaster.
Sam Brown’s jiggy like yesterday’s lunch
you use a bad word and he gives you a crunch.
Why don’t you libtards just darn grow up?
The comments you leave make us all throw up.
Maybe if you learned how to use your brain
you wouldn’t be stomped hard by Marty McPain.
BJ Tabor can rock the house
People try to diss him but he’s got ya’ nowse.
Elephant Bones, got nuttin to say.
Ask all his friends, they’ll tell you he’s gay.
Arn really likes them jazz cigarettes
But when he writes comments it’s like tourettes.
Lyssie B.’s ev’ryone’s favorite girl.
Give her a rock, she’ll say it’s a pearl.
Spacebrother is a Ron Paul freak,
Meet him in life and you’ll find him a geek.
Big Bob Corker can debate like a man
When he’s done, and you’re beat, empty out your brain pan.
Relee is our favorite dude.
He’s really got one mean lovin’ attitude.
Faithmouse is a superior strip,
And I’m not sayin’ that ’cause Dan sent us a tip!
Break it down!
(breakbeat drum solo)
Whir it up!
Psycheout’s here right on the mike,
He’s got nothin’ to hate, ev’rything to like.
B4B rap time is done
If you don’t like it, I’m sorry, son.
Yo. Work it out.
Are we hip now? Is this thing on?
— Grandmaster Psycheout