Blogs 4 Brownback

December 27, 2007

Special Announcement

UrgentI had a mind-shattering epiphany last night, a nightmare vision that I have to share with you all. I find that I can no longer, in good conscience, support Senator Brownback directly in his campaign for the Presidency. Instead, I feel compelled to endorse Michael Huckabee, the candidate who will “tack” Brownback into office.

Last night, I was praying in the closet (as usual). I prayed to the Lord for a Brownback victory, and that President Brownback be given the power to smite the enemies of God. Suddenly, it seemed to me that a yawning abyss opened before me. Within, I saw a nightmare city I can’t describe, and don’t want to.

Hellish VisionUnutterable dark emanations of unspeakable horrors that cannot be named, cannot be grasped by the rational minds of Children of God loomed before me. These witch-lights showed a scene of utmost depravity, of inconceivable blasphemy. Women and children cavorted with dogs, goats, donkeys, and men of all tribes, religions, and deviancies. Drug dealers ran open-air forums, even injecting passing policemen with their sinful wares with complete impunity. Churches were draped in gasoline-soaked American flags, then set afire. Terrorists roamed the streets in jeeps, shooting anyone who wore a crucifix or made the Sign of the Cross. The Democrat Party had a special torture center for Americans who dared to vote their conscience, which they let Al Qaeda run for them.

It was horrible. As I stared down into this unimaginable den of iniquity and abomination, I felt my mind beginning to cross over the threshold into madness. Then an angel came to save me. A sudden fluttering of light, the abundance of feathers, and lovely morningsongs from Heaven pulled me back from the brink. I looked up, and found myself staring into the face of the harbinger of Ultimate Beauty.

Angel“Sisyphus, I am a messenger from God,” he said. “This horrifying thing you see before you is the city of San Francisco, in the year 2011, should the Democrats win the election. What is worse, the leftards will use the thought-control technology they’ve been quietly perfecting for the last 50 years to beam this filth from the sin-centers of San Francisco and Manhattan directly into the minds of young people from Iowa, Kansas, and the other wholesome parts of the country. God has sent me to tell you that this cannot be allowed to happen. He has offered the crown to Senator Brownback, but like Saul before him, Brownback has proven unworthy of it. Therefore, as He did with David, God has anointed Huckabee to be His chosen king on Earth. You, His faithful servant, must obey His edicts.”

Then the angel disappeared, the Hellish vista vanished, and I found myself screaming and crying in my closet.

AriseI feel I cannot, in good conscience, show a stiff neck to Heaven. I must alter my endorsement, switching it to Governor Huckabee. My hope is that this move will cause Brownback to relent, to reenter the race and allow God to grant him victory. God may yet be clement. God is merciful, and we must all pray that Brownback will cease to anger Him. I also harbor a secret hope that President Huckabee will appoint Brownback his Vice President in a move to allay Catholics, then find himself forced to step down while in office. God may yet secure the Presidency for Brownback in such a fashion.

Those are my secret hopes. But one cannot go against the Will of God. Therefore, I am changing my endorsement to Michael Huckabee. A good man, who will make a great President. And if Brownback can’t take over, maybe God can at least see to it that Huckabee converts to Catholicism himself before 2016. One can always pray for the best for one’s friends and allies.

41 Comments »

  1. Hehe…..Bye Bye Brownback
    (And don’t take too much drugs, those visions really are psychotic enough)

    Comment by MoxoM — December 27, 2007 @ 12:44 pm | Reply

  2. Sisyphus,

    God has spoken on the election Huckabee is His anointed PRAISE!. To vote against Huckabee is to vote with Satan. I had the same feeling that The Lord was with Huckabee when I saw the miracle of the Cross in Huckabee’s Christmas message to the Nation.

    BTW for anyone who thinks San Fransissyco is a “nice” place read about how these three sinners received the wages of sin.
    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071227/ap_on_re_us/tiger_escapes

    Jesus and Huckabee in ’09! GLORY!

    Comment by BJ Tabor — December 27, 2007 @ 12:52 pm | Reply

  3. Wow, what an incredible vision and visitation. I always knew G-d had a special mission for you, but I didn’t realize He would send a Divine vision and a Heavenly messenger to you.

    I hope G-d has a plan for me too. I hope I’m on the right path.

    We need to talk about this. Shoot me an email.

    Incredible post, Sisyphus. I’m stunned.

    Comment by Psycheout — December 27, 2007 @ 1:47 pm | Reply

  4. “…I felt my mind beginning to cross over the threshold into madness…”

    I was wondering when you would feel that.

    “What is worse, the leftards…”

    Have they been using the term “leftards” in heaven for long? I thought used proper English and grammar in heaven.

    “…will use the thought-control technology they’ve been quietly perfecting for the last 50 years”

    Umm I thought they have been working on the thought-control technology for the last 2000 or so years. Although ISTM was the righttards (one or two t’s in that?) that created that.

    Comment by Rahein — December 27, 2007 @ 1:55 pm | Reply

  5. Whatever stuff you were smoking, I´d like to get some of it.

    Especially that Mind Control part. Now that really belongs into the Black helicopters category.

    Comment by PG — December 27, 2007 @ 2:07 pm | Reply

  6. Incredible vision! Do the Huckabuck!

    Comment by Roy Ubu — December 27, 2007 @ 3:49 pm | Reply

  7. Our own Sam Brown is already blogging for Huck over at Blogs 4 Huckabee. He’s doing a pretty good job of it too. Sisyphus, you might want to help out if G-d asks you to.

    I’m still undecided, although I do like Huckabee. Your compelling post is rather hard to ignore, so who knows.

    I like Mike?

    Comment by Psycheout — December 27, 2007 @ 3:56 pm | Reply

  8. While Huckabee is certainly a good and Christian (Baptist) man, I have a serious problem with his rather lenient position on the Mexican problem.
    My wife, Helen, and I employ several of those people as household help in our home. We are good Christian employers. We give them all the dinner leftovers and all our outdated or worn clothing. We even gave them two hours off and let them use our barbeque pit on the Fifth of May.
    I’m afraid if Huckabee takes over those people will be in near revolt. They’ll demand minimum wage, social security, health care, and all the other perks of our decadent society. This could be the end of Christian life in these United States of God!

    Comment by Peter Bock — December 27, 2007 @ 4:08 pm | Reply

  9. Whatever the case, we must keep pushing for execution laws for sodomy, abortion, and blasphemy. Huckabee may very well be the agent to bring these laws to reality.

    Comment by bobcorker — December 27, 2007 @ 4:25 pm | Reply

  10. If blasphemers would be executed, then you would be the first in line Bob.

    Comment by MoxoM — December 27, 2007 @ 6:45 pm | Reply

  11. Last night, I was praying the closet (as usual).

    Do you mean to say in the closet? Or to the closet?

    If it’s the former, are you sure that G-d isn’t sending you the message that you should come out of the closet? He works in mysterious ways, and all that.
    😛

    Comment by ChenZhen — December 27, 2007 @ 9:58 pm | Reply

  12. “My wife, Helen, and I employ several of those people as household help in our home. We are good Christian employers. We give them all the dinner leftovers and all our outdated or worn clothing. We even gave them two hours off and let them use our barbeque pit on the Fifth of May.
    I’m afraid if Huckabee takes over those people will be in near revolt. They’ll demand minimum wage, social security, health care, and all the other perks of our decadent society. This could be the end of Christian life in these United States of God!”

    President Huckabee should appoint Tancredo as his Interior Secretary, to handle these sorts of concerns. Rest assured, a solution will be found to every such problem.

    Comment by Sisyphus — December 27, 2007 @ 10:13 pm | Reply

  13. Wow, wonder if Arn will be angry once he finds out you were stealing from his special stash.

    You know, if you wanted to admit you were wrong about Brownback and change your endorsement, you could have just said that, rather than make up some vision as an excuse. If God moves in mysterious ways, he’s not going to waste his time informing some insignificant blogger about his plans.

    You’re not fooling anyone. Anyone important, that is.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 27, 2007 @ 10:18 pm | Reply

  14. You are really, really mental.

    MIND control technology?

    “YA THOSE EVUL HIPPY LIEBERALS IN TEH SAN FRAN ARE GOIN 2 USE MIND CONTORL TO BRIANWASH US!!!11!1haloz”

    Look, if you want your religious beliefs, fine – there is nothing in the Constitution or Bill of Rights that states you can’t have your beliefs; however, that is as far as religion goes; the Government was intended to be secular because there would be no possibility for religions vying for control that way; in other words, you can’t pass laws according to your agenda.

    My point is that to have a Christian Government (or a Government of any religion) would encourage a political agenda based on it; outlawing alcohol, forcing women to wear burkhas, banning rock music, video games and anything remotely fun will result from it.

    Don’t force religious views on people; that doesn’t stop their thought life, does it? You might ban rock music, but people will still want to play it.

    I will pray to God that the author of this blog, and his (or her) advocates, will be enlightened.

    BTW, heliocentricism IS true; when the Bible says “God holds the world firmly in its place”, it is figurative; he protects it, keeps it ‘steady’.

    Comment by Felis — December 27, 2007 @ 11:20 pm | Reply

  15. “BTW, heliocentricism IS true; when the Bible says “God holds the world firmly in its place”, it is figurative”
    Save your energy, friend, they’re not smart enough to think outside literal interpretations.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 28, 2007 @ 12:28 am | Reply

  16. Felis,

    We have Freedom [b]of[/b] religion in this country, not freedom [b]from[/b] religion.

    Comment by BJ Tabor — December 28, 2007 @ 8:15 am | Reply

  17. Felis,

    We have Freedom [b]of[/b] religion in this country, not freedom [b]from[/b] religion.

    Comment by BJ Tabor — December 28, 2007 @ 8:15 am

    Wrong, we have (b)both(/b).

    Comment by TrogdortheEnlightened — December 28, 2007 @ 8:35 am | Reply

  18. We also have separation of church and state, BJ

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 28, 2007 @ 9:31 am | Reply

  19. We have Freedom [b]of[/b] religion in this country, not freedom [b]from[/b] religion.

    Yeah, which also means freedom to have NO religion.

    Comment by PG — December 28, 2007 @ 12:08 pm | Reply

  20. My point is that to have a Christian Government (or a Government of any religion) would encourage a political agenda based on it; outlawing alcohol, forcing women to wear burkhas, banning rock music, video games and anything remotely fun will result from it.”

    Well, yes. I should certainly hope so. God wanted this a Christian nation, and a Christian nation it is, was, and shall ever be. If that takes a “political agenda” to enforce, I’m all for it.

    Comment by Sisyphus — December 28, 2007 @ 1:05 pm | Reply

  21. I’m not so sure about the bhurkas, but the rest sounds about right. Women should not dress as sluts, that’s for sure, but forcing ladies to wear a burlap towel on their head seems pretty darn goofy.

    If by “bhurka” you are metaphorically referring to traditional conservative clothing, then yes, I’d be all for it.

    Comment by Psycheout — December 28, 2007 @ 1:37 pm | Reply

  22. Well, yes. I should certainly hope so. God wanted this a Christian nation, and a Christian nation it is, was, and shall ever be. If that takes a “political agenda” to enforce, I’m all for it.

    Too bad that the people writing the freakin´ consitution had something else in mind than god. Especially considering that the USA have never been a purely christian nation to begin with. (A hint: The USA did not exist from that moment on when the pilgrims landed.)

    Comment by PG — December 28, 2007 @ 3:18 pm | Reply

  23. I think the cordet should be required to be worn by all women. The great evils inherent in women’s anatomy should be supressed just fine in cordets. A burqa is too Islamist.

    Comment by bobcorker — December 28, 2007 @ 4:55 pm | Reply

  24. “God wanted this a Christian nation”
    Sorry, you’re confusing your own desires with the desires of the Creator. Unless you can provide evidence that God wants this a Christian nation, you’re just proving to everyone that you think you can tell God what to do. For shame.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — December 29, 2007 @ 1:55 pm | Reply

  25. So Sisyphus came out of the closet. He must want man sex with BJ, KKKorkkker and Psycheout.

    Comment by Stinkyfistkkkorkkkerpumper — December 30, 2007 @ 12:48 am | Reply

  26. GO DEMOCRATS!!!!!

    Comment by DEMOCRATS RULE!!! — January 1, 2008 @ 2:40 am | Reply

  27. “If it’s the former, are you sure that G-d isn’t sending you the message that you should come out of the closet? He works in mysterious ways, and all that.”

    So I wasn’t the only one beginning to wonder what that sentence said about Sisy’s masculinity? Good to know. Also, you might be more comfortable just praying in your room, rather than cramping yourself in the closet.

    And Bob, please tell us what a “cordet” is. I’ve been trying to find it on various online encyclopedias, but the only entries I’ve been getting are about a Playboy bunny, and I’m sure that can’t be what you’re talking about. Do you mean a corset? Because I tried on one of those during my goth phase, and it wasn’t very flattering. I also wasn’t sure how I was supposed to keep it from slipping and exposing my bosoms, since I couldn’t wear unmentionables under it without the straps showing.

    “Sorry, you’re confusing your own desires with the desires of the Creator. Unless you can provide evidence that God wants this a Christian nation, you’re just proving to everyone that you think you can tell God what to do. For shame.”

    EB, I’ve been noticing a disturbing amount of that in our society lately. As the saying goes, God made man in his own image. Man then returned the favor.

    Comment by L — January 1, 2008 @ 11:05 pm | Reply

  28. Well, I’m back. Hello all.

    One thing really confused me Sisyphus; why do you pray in a closet?

    Dear Psycheout, why do you replace the “o” in “God” with “-“? it may be a sign of respect in your mind, but it slows down reading rate, which it terrible.

    Post 8.

    Your opposition of equality saddens me greatly. More… well supremist arrogence. coughNAZIcough.

    Post 9.
    “sodomy, abortion, and blasphemy” Right, so make abortion illigal, and back-street doctors will kill more women, and how do you police blasphemy (how are you going to catch someone who on their own, curses, e.g. ‘Jesus Christ!’ Everyone can probaly guess my views oh homophobia.

    Post 12.
    “You know, if you wanted to admit you were wrong about Brownback and change your endorsement, you could have just said that, rather than make up some vision as an excuse. If God moves in mysterious ways, he’s not going to waste his time informing some insignificant blogger about his plans.”

    I agree with this, but, God is supposed to be Infinite and all (I have yet to find any metion of a limited ‘supreme creator’ anyways), so the “waste his time” is a little useless.

    Post 14.
    Felis, have a big metaphorical hug. You seem reasonable.

    Post 24.
    For goodness sake, how immature, grow up [Note, a 17 year old told you to do this, so… need I explain the rest?]

    Post 25.
    Well, that was completly random.

    Post 26.
    “And Bob, please tell us what a “cordet” is. I’ve been trying to find it on various online encyclopedias, but the only entries I’ve been getting are about a Playboy bunny, and I’m sure that can’t be what you’re talking about. Do you mean a corset?”

    That’s a wee bit mean, sure anyone can make a typo, and “d” and “s” are beside eachother.

    “since I couldn’t wear unmentionables under ”
    Why are your unmentionables unmentionable? (sorry, couldn’t resist)

    “God made man in his own image. Man then returned the favor.”

    Great saying! hope you don’t mind if I take it and Never refrence you are the one who posted it.

    Corsets are also supposed to be bad for your liver, or so I have heard (note that I have no research to back this up).

    Comment by Austin — January 3, 2008 @ 12:51 pm | Reply

  29. “One thing really confused me Sisyphus; why do you pray in a closet?”

    The Bible tells me to. Where do you pray, over a steaming pile of sheep entrails the way your phony pagan “gods” tell YOU to?

    Comment by Sisyphus — January 3, 2008 @ 1:10 pm | Reply

  30. Oh wow, look at what I missed, Sisy had a vision. Why doesn’t that surprise me?

    I have a friend that works in that area of medicine. Think I’ll ask him if there is any medical term for the condition that makes you see demons in harmless creatures, then makes you think you had a vision of an angel telling him who should be president. And the angel even called him by his online name instead of his real name.

    And I thought you were a conservative , conservative christians don’t interpret that literally and continue to pray in public. And which bible do you read? To call drinking a sin you quoted from a new translation so you could include the word beer, and here you are going by the KJV to say you were told to pray in the closet. (the new translations say “inner room” or “in your most private place” and a few others depending on which translation you are reading). Just curious, because with each translation you find different meanings in the same verse. The book of Matthew (the one you went to the closet for) has lots of verses whose meanings change with each different translation.

    Comment by Arn — January 3, 2008 @ 1:39 pm | Reply

  31. “Think I’ll ask him if there is any medical term for the condition that makes you see demons in harmless creatures, then makes you think you had a vision of an angel telling him who should be president.”
    It’s sisyphusophrenia. Treat with liberal doses of cyanide and common sense.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — January 3, 2008 @ 3:11 pm | Reply

  32. So, to all the people saying “A vote against Huckabee is a vote for Satan,” what happened to your support for Brownback? Would a write-in for Brownback (which won’t do dick, BTW) be a vote for Satan?

    Comment by L. — January 4, 2008 @ 12:19 pm | Reply

  33. A write-in vote for Brownback is also a vote for Huckabee. Huckabee’s going to win, regardless; he can spare some votes for Brownback’s write-in to the Vice Presidency.

    Comment by Sisyphus — January 4, 2008 @ 12:29 pm | Reply

  34. oh, delusions delusions delusions. Fadedrose was right when she said they were in their own little world.

    Comment by Arn — January 4, 2008 @ 1:27 pm | Reply

  35. If Obama wins the Dem nomination, he will beat any and all of the Republicans. If Hillary gets the nomination, a Republican would win.

    So if you support Huckabee, you’d better start praying for a Hillary win if you want your candidate to occupy the White House.

    Comment by Spacebrother — January 4, 2008 @ 1:39 pm | Reply

  36. Although Austin is a liberal, he seems very smart. The regular liberals (except L, she’s alright) need to learn from this guy.

    Comment by bobcorker — January 4, 2008 @ 6:47 pm | Reply

  37. Awww. (Post 38.) That’s nice. Thanks bobcorker; that made me smile. And I needed a smile because of what i read above. I seem smart. Finally! fooled someone at least (even if it’s only on the web) success😀.

    Elephant Bones is good enought also (a mon avis). She (or was it he, I can’t remember, sorry Elephant Bones) is an amused basher, or; someone you bash depending on your standpoint.
    L is simply wonderful. Excellent… i won’t bother going on, you get the idea.

    Psycheout, I retract my question about the “-” in place of “o” in “God.” I have taken that into my lexicon, and reading rate is normal. Sorry about that.

    Sisyphus.

    Sisyphus!

    The claws are coming out, bitch. [word that will probaly be edited out refered to female dog]

    Post 28.
    “The Bible tells me to. Where do you pray, over a steaming pile of sheep entrails the way your phony pagan “gods” tell YOU to?”

    My thanks for answering my question.

    In resopnse to your question; “where do you pray” I don’t, not in the form that you are most other would see it. I instead sacrafice my time by concntrating strongly about the thing I desire to happen, so If there is a diving mind-reading being, that is a prayer, and if we are all God (or is that god… hmmmm) then my thoughts are twisting the Universe in such a way that gives the person/event postive (or if I desire, negative) spirtual energy, or to sum that all up: Luck. Be it good are bad.

    Now. As you have no doupt inferred, I am annoyed. Congratulations on that.

    I have not, EVER, on this website, or anywhere on the internet discussed my beliefs/lack of beliefs, growing belifes or decaying belifes, (That is to cover all bases, from Islam to Christin to… one of those religons, you know it’s big in Japan, to agnostic or athiest).

    And finally, about me, I am from Northern Ireland. There is a saying that I find funny: “In Ireland, there are two religons, Us and Them. If asked which one you are, just say ‘Thank God i’m an atheist'”

    I am not however, pagan. I will admit that. I do not have the required knoweledge of the rites, rituals, and an incomplete knoweldge of the gods from each set. That will be rectified. Eventually

    “over a steaming pile of sheep entrails”

    So, is that cooked/boiled or is that mearly steaming as the sheep is freshly killed and it’s a very cold day?

    Entrails. Eugh. really, not plesant. However, I do wonder what area had a religion that prayed over sheep entrails. The Greeks, Romans, Norse, Celts? Maybe it is to the Tuatha Dé Danann? Please, elobrate, as i am more than a little curious.

    How dare you. “Phony gods”! excuse me, but a fair wee amount of Christanity is based on the faiths that worshipped these. Of the very top of my head, the Norse goddess Hel, ruler of the underworld (I think that the land may also have been called Hel), daughter of Loki the trickster, was adopted by the church as, you guessed it; Hell. Place of eternal torment.

    I wuld go on, but am now bored, so i’ll leave you with this link (err, my blogging skill don’t exist yet, so it can’t hyperlink a word, but that will be fixed in about eight months when I go to uni.) http://www.pocm.info/ . enjoy

    Comment by Austin — January 4, 2008 @ 9:21 pm | Reply

  38. Actually Austin, I think by entrails he meant feces, it’s just the context and knowing how he writes and thinks. But now he will probably look up entrails then pretend that’s what he meant all along.

    Comment by Arn — January 4, 2008 @ 9:44 pm | Reply

  39. I’m a guy, Austin. It’s no big deal.

    Comment by Elephant Bones — January 4, 2008 @ 10:04 pm | Reply

  40. I won’t question the authenticity of your vision, since there is absolutely no way to verify or dismiss it.

    I will, though, ask this:

    What do you think you can accomplish? I don’t mean that in a derogatory sense. Rather, if the Democrats win the presidency, wasn’t it fated to happen to begin with? I’ve always been under the impression that, should the Judeo-Christian God exist, he would know exactly how the future would turn out, as though it were already written. That’s what I’ve gathered from biblical studies and logic, at least.

    So, in case what I’m saying is confusing to anyone, here’s my point. If God exists as Judeo-Christian thought says he does, then

    1)The vision Sisyphus had is indeed legitimate (it truly “came from God”), and the events therein are fated to happen, so there’s nothing he can do about it. He just has advance notice of things, although everyone will dismiss him as a crackpot.
    2)The vision Sisyphus had is indeed legitimate, but the events therein will not transpire. The vision is not meant to be taken literally, and Sisyphus will be dismissed as a crackpot.
    3)The vision isn’t real.

    I’m only including #3 because I know people will whine about it if I don’t. So, Sisyphus, if you truly had this vision and aren’t yanking our collective chain, then what do you hope to do about it? If it really is the future, isn’t it going to happen no matter what?

    Comment by Brian-sama — January 8, 2008 @ 3:49 pm | Reply

  41. “Huckabee was the last obstacle to the Brownback write-in campaign. My faith is too strong to allow me to believe that God hates America this much.”

    So you admit that god hates America.

    I love how extreme right-wingers don’t need to be made fun of, they do it to themselves and think they’re better than everyone else because of it.

    Meanwhile, when you’re telling brainwashed bible-thumpers what to do, I’ll be here in my own, free country, enjoying the fact that I rarely have to worry about hearing about religious figure-heads raping young boys.
    Also, wasn’t Pope Benedict part of the Hitler Youth?

    Sounds like a great time to be a heathen!

    Comment by Crazy Canuck — April 15, 2008 @ 2:05 pm | Reply


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