America’s space agency was shaken Thursday by two startling and unrelated reports: One involved claims that astronauts were drunk before flying. The other was news from NASA itself that a worker had sabotaged a computer set for delivery to the international space station.
Why not get drunk? All they’re going to do is drive the thing into the desert and spend some time gambling taxpayer money in Las Vegas. NASA is a hoax, outer space is a hoax, and you, the American taxpayer, are the victim of a con game.
Aviation Week & Space Technology reported on its Web site that a special panel studying astronaut health found that on two occasions, astronauts were allowed to fly after flight surgeons and other astronauts warned they were so drunk they posed a safety risk.
This is only serious because if they crash it into the landing strip in Arizona, we’ll have to buy them a new one with which they an carry out their boondoggle on us.
The independent panel also found “heavy use of alcohol” before launch — within the standard 12-hour “bottle-to-throttle” rule, the magazine reported.
A NASA official confirmed the report contains such details, but said they were from anonymous interviews and not substantiated. The official asked that his name not be used because NASA will discuss the health report on Friday.
The Aviation Week story did not say how long ago the alleged incidents took place, nor did it say whether it involved pilots or other crew members.
In defense of the “astronauts”, maybe they were flying back from Las Vegas at the time, and had lost heavily on the games.
At a news conference to discuss the upcoming space shuttle launch set for Aug. 7, NASA’s space operations chief was asked repeatedly about the drunken astronaut report.
That sentence, alone, shows why NASA should be disbanded.
But Gerstenmaier had more news. He revealed that an employee for a NASA subcontractor had cut the wires in a computer that was about to be loaded into the shuttle Endeavour for launch.
The subcontractor, which he wouldn’t name, contacted NASA 1 1/2 weeks ago, as soon as it learned that another computer had been damaged deliberately, Gerstenmaier said. Had the contractor not discovered the problem, NASA would have uncovered it by testing the computer before launch, Gerstenmaier said. Safety was not an issue, he added.
He refused to speculate on the worker’s motive. He also wouldn’t say where the sabotage occurred. He said it did not happen in Florida and had nothing to do with an ongoing strike at the Kennedy Space Center by a machinists’ union.
Wonderful. Union Communists are stealing from the Communists stealing our money at NASA. I don’t even know which band of thieves to root for. The bottom line is that they’re all stealing from us. They know perfectly well that space travel is as impossible as time travel, yet they use it as a handy extortion-measure, saying that if we don’t conquer the ether first, the Chinese will. Well, unless the Chinese can invent a flying nuclear submarine, I think we have little to fear from their conquest of the watery Heavens. Should they penetrate this body too far, they risk travel into the Infernal regions. Satan will prepare a warm reception for any foolish enough to travel into his domain within their mortal shells.
I propose that we abolish NASA, and use the savings to construct a prison in which to house those who have used NASA as a means of robbing and stealing from the American people for all these years. It is poetic justice, if you will; but more importantly, it is justice.