If this is the best the left can do, we’re going to have no problem getting Sam Brownback to the White House. Some weirdo going by the pseudonym “plover” came up with this rather weak hit piece: Brownback May Be Pro-Spider, also Pregnant. It seems that the head propagandist, Pinko Punko, who I’ve crossed swords with on occasion, was too scared to pen the piece himself.
They begin innocently enough, pointing out the good work Senator Brownback has done in helping to eradicate malaria-causing mosquitos in Africa, and then segue to what they apparently consider the big question: Is Senator Brownback Pro-Spider?
Asked whether the Senator favored the pro-spider agenda, a Brownback staffer replied, “What are you talking about?” Given Brownback’s prior efforts on behalf of pro-spider principles, it seems necessary to get to the bottom of this. When solicited for comment, a spider outside my window said, “…”
It goes on for awhile with several words separated by punctuation and linebreaks and other such things, when finally, from out of nowhere, the big handful of mud is thrown:
In other news, it is going to have been reported next April that Senator Brownback seems to be pregnant. In a quite literal display of embryophilia, Senator Brownback’s own body appears to be going to demonstrate his devotion to embryos by actually producing one.
Notice the sly use of the uncommon future perfect tense. It hasn’t happened yet, but it will have happened at some theoretical point in the future. Nice rhetorical trap. I can’t disprove a negative can I? And I’m not even going near a future negative.
This attempted attack is similar to the slimy tactics used by Democrat party favorite LBJ who accused an opponent of getting too friendly with farm animals. Although he couldn’t prove it, he really wanted to fool his opponent into denying it. Nice attempt at trapping us in a spider web of your own, plover, but I will already have addressed and dismissed it before you would have thought to have alleged it.
I suspect this is an elaborate gag by a spoof blog simply looking for attention, but they’d probably have taunted me and hurled insults unless and until I responded. So go read the whole thing (blah, blah, blah) and they won’t feel so ignored and cranky. Now, with the 3 Bulls weirdos sated, we can move along to more serious topics.
In all seriousness, it was a pretty funny post. I give them several points for creativity and one point for irony, points which I must take away since they are a bunch of leftist chunderloaves who are objectively pro-sink lettuce. See? Brownback supporters do have a sense of humor. And I have it on good authority that Sam Brownback himself is a very funny person who would probably have enjoyed this.
Belated Update: The rebuttal is in and it burns: B4B makes their position clear as mud while impugning the “Culture of Life”.